Chapter 1

“Ambush! Get down!”  

A bullet grazed above their heads. A soldier beside the wall collapsed without a sound. A grenade flew under the outpost and exploded with a deafening roar. Screams, shouts, and cries filled the air. The despair that clung to the skin felt damp. Amid the chaos, a sergeant grabbed the man’s arm.  

“You need to get down, Lieutenant!”  

The moment he finished speaking, a bullet pierced the sergeant’s forehead. The man, still staring at the fallen soldier who had already become a corpse with his eyes wide open, loaded his rifle. He aimed at the sniper through the sight.  

The sniper was also looking at him. It was going to be one or the other. Either his bullet would reach the other side first, or the other’s bullet would reach him first.  

Did it matter which?  

Without hesitation, he pulled the trigger.  

Helen.  

When the man opened his eyes again, the ground was shaking. No, the stretcher he was lying on was swaying back and forth.  

“Wounded soldier! Critical condition!”  

It was a field hospital. He could only guess since he couldn’t see. The world was pitch black. His whole body felt heavy as though he were submerged in a deep swamp.  

Had I gone blind? 

The man groped his face with hands caked in dried blood, dust, and mud. His face was entirely wrapped in bandages. A medic, who had been searching for something to confirm his identity, shouted. It was a foreign language he couldn’t understand.  

With the sound of hurried footsteps, strong hands grabbed his shoulders and shook him.  

Name, name.  

Clumsy words in the language of Ethelwood pierced his ears. Instead of answering, the man writhed and gasped for breath. His body felt like it was burning, as though he had been thrown under the scorching desert sun.  

The doctor, examining his wounds, gave sharp instructions to the surrounding staff with a grave expression. The ground shook again.  

The moment he was moved to the operating room, the hands probing his wounds caused excruciating pain, as though his flesh was being cut with a sharp blade. The man, writhing silently in his leaden body, finally opened his mouth. Seeing his lips barely move, the doctor leaned in close to hear.  

“Just… leave me… alone.”  

His desperate plea was more like a muffled murmur. Frustrated by his inability to understand, the doctor’s face suddenly lit up with realization. He called out to someone.  

“Helen!”  

The dying man gasped for breath.  

The heartbeat that had been slowing to a near stop suddenly began to race. Light footsteps approached, followed by a calm, slightly low voice.  

Helen.  

It was auditory hallucination. There was no way she could be here.  

And yet, his body reacted. He panted with trembling breaths. The veins on his hand bulged as he gripped the bloodstained sheet tightly. A warm hand covered his own.  

He would never forget.  

“Are you okay?”  

Helen.  

“Judging by your uniform, you’re from Ethelwood, right?”  

Helen.  

“If you understand what I’m saying, please hold my hand tightly.”  

Helen.  

“You have to survive. There’s someone waiting for you, isn’t there?”  

His heart began to pound as if it would burst. The doctor monitoring his heartbeat gestured with his eyes. A nurse prepared a syringe. The anesthetic seeped into his veins.  

No.  

Don’t go.  

Stay with me.  

With the last of his strength, he turned his hand over. The soft hand was caught in his grasp. A gentle voice whispered comfortingly.  

“Don’t cry.”  

Please. Helen.  

*

3 years ago.  

‘Will I be able to do this?’  

As she stepped down from the carriage, Helen took a deep breath. Carefully placing her foot on the ground, she looked around. Everything was unfamiliar. The coachman, who had retrieved her luggage from the roof of the carriage, kindly guided her.  

“If you’re heading to Grown Hall, you can wait for a hired carriage here.”  

“How long will it take?”  

“Let’s see.”  

At Helen’s question, the coachman pulled out an old pocket watch.  

“It should arrive in about fifteen minutes.”  

“I see. Thank you.”  

“Are you the new tutor?”  

“What makes you think so?”  

“Well, from your demeanor and attire, you don’t seem like a maid.”  

It was a statement with many implications. She wasn’t a maid, but neither did she appear to be a noblewoman. After all, a lady of the upper class would never ride a hired carriage.  

“Where are you from—”  

“It seems the other passengers are waiting. Thank you for unloading my luggage.”  

Sensing the conversation would drag on, Helen cut it short and took her luggage.  

As the carriage departed, she was left alone at the makeshift station.  

The city was lined neatly with buildings constructed in the style of the old dynasty.  

It was a cold dawn. With the sun just beginning to rise, there were few people around. A newspaper delivery boy, a chimney sweep with soot on his cheeks and equipment slung over his shoulder, and women heading to nearby factories passed by her.  

“It’s cold…”  

One day, she had come across a job posting for a tutor in the newspaper and impulsively decided to apply. The decision, unsurprisingly, met with fierce opposition.  

—Helen Godwin. Do you really have to go so far away?  

—Simon.  

—Even if you hate me…  

—I don’t hate you, my dear relative.  

Her kind and gentle childhood friend. Helen looked into his tearful eyes and explained.  

—I’ve taken care of Father during his long illness for so long.  

—Helen…  

—Now that I’m finally free, I don’t want to be trapped in this house again.  

—I truly…!  

—More than anything, Simon. You say you like me, but that’s just because I’m ‘familiar’ to you. Just as you are to me.  

—I’ll wait for you.  

—Simon.  

—It’s only a year, right? The contract period.  

—…  

—I’ll wait until you open your heart to me, until you return. So take your time.  

That was the end of it. Her bags had already been packed, and Helen immediately left the small estate and boarded the hired carriage, clutching the concise job posting.  

Job Posting for a Live-In Tutor.

Women aged 23–29.  

High school diploma required.  

Must not be beautiful.  

The moment she saw it, she thought it was fate. Everything about it pointed to her. Her reddish-brown curly hair, which never stayed straight no matter how much she tried. Her rusty-brown eyes, neither this nor that. Unlike the petite young ladies often praised for looking like fairies, she stood over 5 feet 6 inches (approximately 167 cm) tall, with a skinny frame lacking any curves. On top of that, freckles were scattered across her nose and cheeks.  

As the daughter of a parish priest, she had managed to complete a high school education despite her modest means. However, for someone not from the upper class, her high level of education was more of a disadvantage. The response she received was always the same—she was seen as a woman who didn’t know her place.  

After her mother passed away, her father, who had been ill for a long time, also passed away, leaving her in an even more desperate situation. The strict laws of the Empire decreed that women could neither become priests nor heirs.  

Fortunately, her father’s only heir and fifth cousin, Simon, proposed to her. But Helen couldn’t bring herself to accept what was essentially a proposal born out of pity. In the small village, rumors spread like wildfire, and people whispered behind her back, calling her a woman with nothing left but her pride.  

She had arrived here as if running away. A place far away, unfamiliar, cold, and where she knew no one.  

While waiting for the carriage in the biting wind, Helen pulled up the collar of her coat. Suddenly, a woman’s voice broke the silence from not far away.  

“You wretched excuse for a human being!”  

Slap.

Startled, Helen turned her head toward the source of the sound. It came from a nearby alley. A woman, her face flushed red, was hurling curses at a man while wearing nothing but a precariously draped slip.  

“How could you sleep with my roommate? Are you even human?”  

Physical violence accompanied by verbal abuse. Helen’s gaze flickered toward the man’s profile, who silently endured the woman’s outburst. For a moment, she held her breath.  

“……”  

To someone like Helen, who had grown up in a remote countryside, the man before her was the most handsome she had ever seen in her life.  

Broad shoulders, long straight legs. Standing at about 6 feet (approximately 183 cm), his tall, sturdy frame was paired with a face that still retained a youthful charm.  

His skin was as flawless and pale as marble. Thick eyebrows arched sharply, and his deep blue eyes sat beneath them like clear wells. His high, straight nose formed a perfect line.  

While Helen was staring blankly at this striking man, he, who had been standing still like a doll, moved his lips.  

“She asked me to hold her, so I did.”  

“What…?”  

“If you don’t like it, I’ll stop.”  

The deep, pleasant voice delivered words that were cold, even icy. The furious woman raised her hand again, but this time, her wrist was caught before she could strike.  

“Ray, you’ve found another woman, haven’t you?”  

“……”  

“Who is she?”  

“I don’t know.”  

A fleeting expression of annoyance, almost bordering on indifference, flashed across his face before disappearing. At that very moment, the man suddenly turned his head. His gaze met Helen’s.  

The man released the woman’s wrist and strode toward Helen, who was frozen in place. Before she could react, he grabbed her waist and took one of her hands.  

“My preferences have changed.”  

The man kissed the back of Helen’s hand and smiled faintly.  

“Say hello, Sarah. This is my new lover who came to meet me.”  

“What did you just say?”  

Before the words even settled, the woman’s face twisted into a terrifying expression, and she charged at Helen. Her demeanor suggested she was ready to pull Helen’s hair out.  

Helen froze like a cornered mouse, unable to move.  

“Run.”  

The man grabbed her wrist and whispered again.  

“Run.”  

“W-what?”  

“Unless you want this to be tomorrow’s gossip.”  

His words were punctuated by the sound of people emerging from the villa, drawn by the commotion. Before the murmurs could grow louder, the man began running, pulling Helen along with him.  

Behind them, the woman’s sharp voice grew fainter.  

“Ray!”  

Helen, dragged along by the man, ran and ran, unable to make sense of anything. By the time her breath was ragged and her legs wobbled, the sudden escape finally came to an end.  

“This spot should do.”  

Bent over and panting heavily, Helen finally looked up. The man pointed ahead.