He survived a height that would not be surprising if he died instantly. At that moment, it rained in Bremlin. Both phenomena were ‘magical’ miracles.
“I know you turned back time by dying for me.”
“…”
“I would like to express my gratitude for that first.”
“It was something I had to do. If I hadn’t ruined you, it wouldn’t have been necessary.”
“Duke Trisel.”
The man’s throat bobbed painfully. Hyacinth called again, looking down at the teacup she couldn’t drink anymore.
“Ethan Erentis.”
“Yes.”
“…Ethan.”
“…”
“I forgive you.”
The words she had always kept inside after making her decision. She finally conveyed those words to the person concerned. Ethan Erentis began to tremble, unable to believe what he had just heard. His gray eyes were filled with blood vessels.
He even seemed to be afraid.
“I regained my memories later than you. Through the medium of dreams, no less. So, the shock was somewhat less.”
When she first regained her memories, she was furious.
But when the resentment and rage subsided, Hyacinth quickly returned to reality. She was still in a reality filled with love and overflowing happiness, making it hard to be shaken by the terrible past she recalled.
The dreams served as a buffer, and happiness diluted the misfortune.
So Hyacinth, although she recalled the memories, was less affected by those violent times.
“I have already taken my revenge on you…”
The man had witnessed her death clearly. Her last words and her falling to death, all of it became a dagger lodged in the man’s soul. Even though time was turned back, the dagger only lodged deeper, not removed.
Hyacinth knew better than anyone.
That every moment he lived, Ethan Erentis lived with a crushing sense of guilt…
“…”
“So, I forgive you.”
“…”
“I apologize for not understanding your tears.”
Hyacinth bowed deeply.
If it weren’t for Ethan Erentis, she would have remained a naive child, unscathed. The wounds were severe, but she grew from them.
She believed she had become a slightly better person by learning humility and tolerance.
“I hope you find happiness now.”
* * *
After sending the woman away, Ethan remained alone in the gazebo.
It was here that Hyacinth Hener had asked him for a kiss. When he refused, she approached and kissed him herself. What an idiot he was, not realizing the fortune he had.
Ethan cried silently. If Hyacinth could never forgive him, could he still linger around her?
He dreamed of such a shameless future.
Hyacinth must have sensed his selfish desires because she forgave him. Thus, she ultimately banished him from her life.
No, it wasn’t that. What he truly wanted was…
I’m sorry for loving you.
He wanted to apologize. At the same time, he wanted to cry and cling to her. He knew better than anyone how shameless and undeserving he was, but he wished for one last chance, promising never to do it again.
He wanted to cherish her more than anything in the world.
He wanted to worship her like a spring that would never return.
He wanted to confess, to plead, to love, and to be loved. He wanted to be happy. The more he realized he couldn’t be happy without her, the more he wanted it.
But he could never reveal his true feelings.
‘Do you love Hyacinth Hener?’
‘…’
‘Loving that woman won’t bring her happiness to you. Rather, your unhappiness will go to her.’
‘I know.’
Damn Bridget.
Yes, he knew well.
Hadn’t he already experienced it once? One experience could always happen twice. Hyacinth Hener was too precious to risk such danger.
Ethan continued to cry.
Was he five or six? Since he vowed never to cry again, he had held back his tears, but now he let them all out.
Accepting that he could never be happy made him feel a little wronged. Why was there no kindness or love in his life? If he had received even a little of it, he might have realized sooner how precious her feelings were and how courageous her honesty was. He wouldn’t have hurt her.
He kept crying and crying, then suddenly thought.
If he were truly noble—if he had such a nature—no matter what, he wouldn’t have hurt her. Even if life was a series of swords, he would have recognized the beauty of flowers immediately.
Ethan laughed bitterly amidst his tears and resigned himself.
He was just a worthless worm from the start.
A hopeless idiot who can’t even die now.
It was only much later that he managed to leave the gazebo. The summer night in the North was more fragrant with the scent of flowers than he had expected.
…Just like her.
* * *
When Hyacinth suggested they return to Tyche, Benjamin and Caleb opened their mouths simultaneously. Their reaction was one of utter incredulity, causing Hyacinth to frown.
“How long were you planning to stay in the North?”
“No, it’s not that, but… ouch!”
As Caleb stammered, Benjamin’s elbow jabbed into his side. As always, Benjamin was quick-witted and considerate, while Caleb was quick-witted but foolish. No different from a bear.
She pitied the lady who would marry him.
Grumbling internally, Hyacinth began packing more energetically. Seina helped her without asking any questions or making any comments. As always, her nanny was the best.
Although Caleb’s occasional interference caused some delays, the preparations went smoothly. Just three days after Hyacinth’s suggestion, they had packed everything.
After feeding the horses well, they would leave for Tyche.
The ducal household had offered to prepare a farewell banquet, but Hyacinth firmly declined to attend. They might criticize her for being rude.
But these were people she would never see again.
So she skipped the banquet and only appeared when the carriage was ready. She gave a polite farewell to the Duke and quickly boarded.
She didn’t want to carefully observe his expression. This was a relationship that would soon be severed.
Following her, Benjamin, Caleb, and nanny Seina boarded in order. She was a bit curious about what they had discussed with the Duke, but she didn’t ask. He was a man she would never, ever, get involved with again!
“Hyce.”
“Hmm?”
It was when the carriage started rolling. Hyacinth, trying to keep her balance, answered reflexively. As soon as she adjusted herself more comfortably, Benjamin suddenly extended his hand.
Hmm…?
Hyacinth looked at her cousin’s palm with a puzzled expression, then saw it. A beautiful erentis flower, boasting a pale yellow color.
Her already large eyes widened even more.
“The Duke’s gift.”
“…”
“It looks like he picked it himself.”
Even though his leg was injured… Even though he was still in pain.
Hyacinth blinked her eyes for no reason. It wasn’t a sad occasion, but she felt a lump in her throat. The moment she opened her mouth, it felt like her emotions would pour out. Her throat felt hot, as if filled with smoke.
As the sound of the rolling carriage scratched at her ears,
Hyacinth abruptly stood up and knocked on the wall loudly. Startled by the urgent signal, the carriage came to a sudden stop. Hyacinth, who nearly fell, steadied herself and immediately opened the door and jumped out.
The man who saw her ran towards her in a panic. Before he could reach her, Hyacinth ran towards Ethan Erentis and stood before him.
His ash-grey eyes, widened in surprise. His reddened eyes and trembling lips. Evidence that he had been holding back tears after she left.
“How does it feel to love me?”
“…”
“Is it terrible? I hope it’s terrible.”
“I, I…”
“Can you really be happy without me?”
Hyacinth asked, almost crashing into him. It was a blunt expression, devoid of any embellishment.
With that simple question, the man finally broke down.
Tears poured out. Ethan Erentis sobbed aloud. The woman reached out her arms. For the first time in his life, he was given a warm embrace, and he buried his face in her delicate shoulder.
“No.”
No, I can’t be happy without you.
You are my only spring. You are the first kindness and love that came to me, so I am sure.
Without you, I will live a life of perpetual unhappiness.
Hyacinth hugged him tightly. In that warmth, hope blossomed, and Ethan finally voiced his selfish wish.
“I want to be happy.”
“Okay.”
“Please, stay by my side…”
“I will.”
The hands that gently stroked his hair and the arms that hugged him tightly. The soothing floral scent from her red hair. Ethan Erentis engraved every sensation deeply into his bones.
He must not forget. He had to overlay and repaint it over and over again until the last beat of his heart.
“Propose to me next spring. Got it?”
“Okay.”
“You can be rejected once. But propose again!”
“I will, I definitely will.”
“Treat me well from now on. So that I can eventually let go of everything. Will you do that?”
Ethan nodded so vigorously that it seemed his head might fall off, even as he cried.
A magical spring. The most perfect miracle.
It was a wish granted by the fairy of the snowfield.
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i went thru so many emotions in this one chapter 🥹 my heart is full knowing they have finally reconciled after so long (especially for ethan). ik its not gonna be easy to move past what happened between the two of them, but its nice to see finally being honest with each other, with hyacinth forgiving ethan and ethan admitting his happiness lies with her. im just 😭
im actually surprised to see this is the end but im happy to know that there will be additional stories beyond this point. thank you so much for bringing this story to us, dorothea 🩷