Chapter 1.9

As she sat in the chair he pulled out for her, she tried to guess what he might say.

“Are you working because of debt?”

“…Yes.”

Although it was far from enough to cover the debt, it was better than not working at all. Above all, she didn’t want to simply consume food in the Baron’s household. One person bedridden due to aftereffects—her mother—was enough.

“Why a café server, of all things? Usually, fallen noblewomen become governesses.”

“……”

A governess. It wasn’t that she hadn’t considered it. But she lacked confidence. Would she really be useful? Was she someone capable of teaching others? Those thoughts held her back.

“Being a governess would pay much better.”

She kept her mouth shut. At that, he propped his chin on one hand and smirked crookedly. The conversation came to a halt.

The waiter placed the appetizers on the table. The utensils were neatly arranged as well. The waiter left. Even though the food had arrived, he didn’t bring up the main topic. In the end, she spoke first.

“What is it you wanted to talk about?”

There must be a purpose. Whether it was about her mother or herself…

“Not much, really.”

But his answer was unexpected. For a moment, she couldn’t hide her expression. He laughed out loud.

“You look confused. It’s just that I regretted letting you leave like that last time. Do you know how flustered I was?”

“……”

“When I came out after washing up, you were gone. I thought you had just gone to the lounge for a bit, so I waited. But you didn’t come back, so I went to check. And you weren’t there.”

His tone was somewhat reproachful, as if she had done something wrong. 

But hadn’t he already achieved his intended purpose?

“It’s over…”

That was all she could say in response. He, who had been smirking crookedly with his chin propped up, let out a short laugh.

“Did I ever say it was just going to be once?”

“Ah…”

A sigh escaped her lips. She was taken aback. He had never said it would only be once. Her pupils trembled.

Did he mean to continue? Until when?

“Once wasn’t enough for me.”

The crooked smile disappeared from his face, replaced by a radiant grin.

“Besides, you’re the only suitable woman for me right now.”

A suitable woman. Even as he said that, he maintained his radiant smile. A suitable woman… To him, she was just a “suitable woman.” Someone who could be summed up in a single word, someone of such insignificant value.

The expectations she thought she had erased finally crumbled completely, and self-loathing filled her. No, in truth, she had felt it subconsciously. She had just been foolishly deluding herself.

Stupid Leticia Evris. Again. You had foolishly expected something, foolishly deluded yourself. Idiotic Leticia Evris. Pathetic Leticia Evris.

What did I think it would be different?

She clenched her fists tightly and took a deep breath. She forced herself not to cry, strengthening her resolve. Fortunately, no tears fell.

“I want to do it right now.”

Karl Lavresion spoke as if her reaction didn’t matter.

“…Until when?”

“Hmm.”

He rolled his eyes as if pondering, then shrugged his shoulders.

“Until I get tired of it?”

Until he got tired of it.

Until he got tired of it…

A suitable woman. Until he got tired of it.

She chewed over those words for a long time before slowly nodding. She had no choice. She had to pay the price for her arrogance…

Dinner was torturous. It felt like chewing on sand. Karl Lavresion kept trying to start light conversations, but her responses were minimal. Her mood was low. It was at rock bottom.

On the way back to the hotel, unlike before, she didn’t cry. She simply followed Karl Lavresion silently.

As soon as they entered the room, he embraced her as if he had been waiting for it. A faint scent of cologne wafted from him. Only then did she realize she had come straight from work and pushed against his chest. She hadn’t sweated, but she felt unclean.

“I need to wash up…”

“It’s fine. You smell nice. You always smell like roses.”

“…I don’t like it.”

“Do you want me to wash you?”

“No.”

She fled into the bathroom. While filling the bathtub with water, she blankly stared at it as it rose.

Memories from her childhood, buried deep, flashed through her mind. Memories she thought she had forgotten…

‘Ah, Father.’

As a child, she had mustered the courage to approach the Emperor for the first time and call him “Father.” She had heard that his birthday was approaching. She had even prepared a gift and a letter for him. At just seven years old, she had made a teddy bear herself.

‘Your birthday is coming up soon, so… Happy birthday, Fa…ther.’

Her voice trembled terribly. The Emperor merely looked down at her, who was nervously speaking. Unlike now, he had been young in her memory. His jet-black hair, without a single strand of gray, was like the night sky.

‘I am not your father.’

The Emperor spoke in an indifferent voice.

‘Although you were conceived with my seed, I am not your father. If anyone, it would be Baron Evris.’

Those words were unbearably cruel to her as a child. Unconsciously, she clenched the teddy bear in her hands tightly. The roughly made bear became misshapen under the pressure.

The Emperor didn’t accept the gift or letter she had prepared and walked straight out. He visited their home maybe once or twice a month, spending a brief time in her mother’s room before leaving just as swiftly.

As a child, she knew what happened in that room. They didn’t care about the child outside, and the sounds they made made that clear…

She went into her room, crouched in a corner, and cried.

What had she been hoping for?

‘Yes, my daughter. Thank you.’

She thought she had been hoping for just a simple phrase like that. As a child, she cried with the teddy bear still clutched in her hands. She cried and cried.

Her vision blurred. Just recalling the memory caused her tear glands to lose control. She quickly shook her head to collect herself and stared at the bathtub water. It seemed like it was ready; she could turn off the tap and immerse herself now.

Even though she knew it was better not to remember, there were moments when the memories would surface. Foolishly expecting, yearning for affection, and deluding herself with “what ifs”…

It always happened during moments like these.

It seemed people didn’t change. Neither her as a child nor her now. Neither her mother nor the Emperor.

She laughed through her tears.

The second time was easier than the first. There wasn’t even a trace of pain, and from start to finish, there was nothing but pleasure. The only difference this time was that her perspective and position changed several times.

She gasped as she felt him gripping her waist and thrusting into her from behind. Each deep plunge made her supporting arms tremble uncontrollably.

“Ah… ah, ngh.”

He leaned forward, his chest pressing against her back. While pressed together, he rotated his hips, his member rubbing against her inner walls. The new stimulation to her already heated body elicited a scream.

“Hahng!”

He laughed.

“Seems like you like it when I grind.”

Now, instead of thrusting, he simply rotated his hips with his member buried deep inside her. Her walls contracted wildly, twitching uncontrollably.

“Ugh… ah, ngh…”

Her arms, which had barely been holding her up, gave out. She collapsed entirely.

Even as she lay sprawled, he didn’t stop moving his hips. She couldn’t even make a sound anymore, only hiccuping as drool dripped from her mouth. She felt dizzy. Her lower body throbbed, and it felt as though her entire blood flow had reversed.

“Damn… you’re so tight.”

He muttered under his breath and grabbed her body with one hand, forcing her upright. In a seated position, he thrust hard again.

“Ahhh!”

A flash of light exploded in her dizzy mind. He didn’t care about her state, moving like a racing horse that wouldn’t stop. Thrust after thrust, his member pierced deep inside, pulling out only to drive in again. Each time, she let out a scream-like moan, throwing her head back.

She had reached her limit. As he cursed under his breath, he grabbed her chest roughly. His hands, kneading her n*pples, were filled with urgency.

She was in no better state. Unable to endure any longer, she thrashed wildly in his arms. Her nails clawed at his wrists, and her elbows struck his chest.

“No, no, ah, ngh, ah!”

The heat coiling in her lower belly felt like it was about to explode…

At the moment he groaned and cl*maxed, she too released something. A clear stream shot into the air.

Even amidst the overwhelming pleasure, she blushed deeply with shame. Something that should have happened in a bathroom had occurred on the bed. A woman in her twenties, acting so disgracefully…

Like someone burned, she yanked herself away from Karl Lavresion and fled to the bathroom. She couldn’t bear the embarrassment.

She turned on the shower hose and sprayed herself without thought. The heat in her face didn’t subside easily. After finishing a quick shower, she stepped out to find Karl Lavresion standing still with a towel in his hand.

“You didn’t take a towel with you.”

She accepted the towel he handed her and dried herself off. He then stepped into the bathroom.

“Don’t run away like last time, okay?”

As she sat on the bed, drying her hair with the towel, he approached and earnestly repeated himself.

“I told you not to leave. Got it? You can’t leave, okay?”

She didn’t even give a perfunctory “okay.” Karl Lavresion’s eyes scanned her as if he found her suspicious. After repeating his plea several more times, he finally entered the bathroom. She never gave him the answer he wanted.

She didn’t know why he didn’t want her to leave, but if she stayed there any longer… she knew she’d be caught up in strange emotions. And she didn’t want that.

She put on her clothes and, just like before, left the hotel while he was still in the bathroom. She glanced up at the hotel once before walking away, and that was the end of it.