Chapter 149. Almorter

It felt as if her breath was choked by the darkly encroaching despair. Ellen closed her eyes tightly, taking a deep breath.

Seeing how great her disappointment was, she must have been unconsciously hoping. That Nov, the mysterious great mage, might somehow solve her lifespan problem…

But as always, miracles don’t happen in reality.

Ellen smiled bitterly as she faced Nov.

“It’s alright, I’ve… been prepared for this for a year now.”

At that moment, Enoch held her even tighter. It was a force strong enough to crush her bones.

“……”

Ellen gently patted his shoulder and let out a sigh as heavy as a lump of coal. Just as she was about to open her mouth, feeling she should say something, Nov’s voice was heard again.

“…While there’s no way to restore the lost lifespan, there is a way for you to live, Grand Duchess.”

“What…? Really?”

Surprised, Ellen stared at Nov with wide eyes. Enoch too watched Nov intently with slightly trembling eyes filled with hope.

“With my magic… the power to manipulate time, it’s possible.”

“……!”

Enoch flinched greatly and moved his lips. He muttered to himself before Nov could continue.

“So it was true after all. Time magic really does exist.”

“…It seems you’ve been investigating time magic, Your Grace.”

“I had to find a way to save Ellen.”

Enoch carefully set Ellen down on the seat beside him and faced Nov with a much straighter posture. His expression was so serious that Ellen felt rather uneasy.

Sure enough, an unbelievable sound came out of Enoch’s mouth.

“With that magic of yours, take my lifespan and give it to Ellen.”

There was not a hint of hesitation in his attitude. As if he had been determined to do so all along.

Shocked, Ellen reflexively grabbed his arm tightly. Enoch’s gaze briefly brushed over her, but soon left, avoiding her.

Nov, who had been blinking in surprise, soon opened his mouth with a somewhat troubled expression.

“Your Grace, that’s…”

“No.”

Ellen quickly interrupted Nov’s words and shook her head. With a tearful yet resolute expression, she said,

“Absolutely not. I’d rather die than let you do something like that…”

Enoch firmly grasped Ellen’s shoulders as she strongly objected. Madness swept through his glittering golden eyes. Words that seemed far from normal flowed from his mouth.

“I’ll die so you can live. Your lifespan was cut short because of me―”

“No! How could I let you die for me? Don’t say such nonsense!”

Enoch tightly embraced Ellen, who was crying and struggling, and let out a low sigh. He had anticipated that Ellen would object. Even so, he was determined not to yield.

I can do anything to save you. That resolve was firm. It was an obsession he couldn’t let go of even in death.

“Ellen.”

He calmly called out to Ellen. Gently wiping her tear-stained face with his fingertips, he looked into her deep, clear aqua eyes.

“You can live without me. You’re capable of that.”

“No, stop saying such crazy things! I…”

“I can’t live without you.”

There was a deep appeal in Enoch’s voice. Ellen looked at him with resentful eyes, seemingly wondering how he could do this.

“If you die, I’ll go completely mad. I’ll end up shooting myself in the head. Because I won’t be able to bear the pain without ending it all.”

…It was truly nonsensical talk.

Ellen couldn’t understand what this man was saying at all. It felt like peering into an unfathomably distant abyss.

Is this madness really love?

Is love a kind of mental illness?

Suddenly, that Katarian word came to mind. Along with its meaning that she had forgotten.

[Love, death. Death by love, love to the point of death.]

And suddenly she realized. The reason why that word had stuck in her heart so much. Why she kept mulling it over.

On the day she had dreamed her mother’s nightmare, she thought she was going mad. At that time, she didn’t know what was driving her mad. She only guessed that her mother’s madness was born because she had married her father.

But after reading all of her mother’s diary, her thoughts changed. Petra Raman’s madness was conceived along with love. A frenzy born because she loved and resented someone to the point of death, to the point of wanting to kill.

And I too.

Ellen now seemed to understand. That she too had gone mad because she had fallen in love with Enoch, the person she had bewitched and violated.

Because she loved him, she lived a year for him, sacrificing herself even as her lifespan was cut short. It might have been a foolish choice. Perhaps from the beginning, she could have bewitched him and used him after he fell in love. Without revealing the card of foresight magic.

A wicked witch would have done so.

But Ellen ultimately couldn’t do it. She couldn’t become the being her mother wanted her to be.

The witch of the remote island could cast the spell knowing that the other person would come to hate her, because she was prepared for the worst.

But Petra Raman couldn’t do that.

She too couldn’t become the being she wanted to be.

Ellen suddenly smiled bitterly. Mother, you’re not a wicked witch after all. You just wanted to be one.

‘My daughter must not love anyone. Don’t love, but dominate, understand? Don’t become a saint.’

The problem with women generally starts with whether she’s a saint or a witch.

If you conform to everything, you can become a saint. Not daring to rebel against the norms of the world, being obedient to your father and husband, being a mother with extreme maternal love.

Then what about a witch? The being at the opposite end. The evil that should rightfully be shunned and burned. A woman harboring desires and resentments not permitted by the world.

Mother was like that, and she knew herself to be a witch in this world. An eternal outsider. A woman despised, shunned, and made a scapegoat by her family. A witch.

So she whispered endlessly, gripped by madness. To her daughter. Don’t become a saint. Don’t fall in love. Don’t die for love.

‘I see.’

That’s why mother passed down the magic of love to her daughter.

Because you too will be either a saint or a witch in this harsh world, become a wicked witch instead. Don’t love the man with power, but use him thoroughly. Don’t mind if that man comes to hate you.

‘…Unfortunately, I couldn’t do that, Mother.’

I just became an ambiguous witch. Like you, Mother.

No, perhaps even worse than you. Because I loved Enoch Bayern, and because I loved him, I completely ruined him.

What should I do?

What should I do with you? A star fallen to earth. You, broken because of me.

Ellen looked at Enoch with a helpless feeling and cupped his cheek with her hand. If only you could forget me. If only you could never know about my death.

“…I ruined you.”

“…What nonsense are you suddenly saying.”

“I’m sorry for making you fall under a witch’s curse.”

Her eyes grew hot. She didn’t want to cry, but tears flowed down her cheeks anyway. The pain surging from within came in a sudden moment. Ellen covered her mouth as she jerked away from Enoch.

“Ellen!”

Red blood flowed through the gaps between her fingers and eventually gushed out. It was like watching a waterfall of blood.

Unbearable pain rushed in mercilessly. As she felt like she might faint from the pain, Ellen felt something cold touch her forehead.

The pain that felt like it was burning from within gradually subsided. A distant sound mixed with tinnitus could be heard.

“It should be alright now. Although it’s just a temporary measure…”

“Do as you said earlier. Give my lifespan to Ellen. Even if you take it all, let Ellen live. Please.”

No.

No, please… Ellen tried her hardest to make a sound. But her whole body felt as heavy as if submerged in water, and she couldn’t move an inch.

“I can’t do something the Grand Duchess doesn’t want, Your Grace. Even if it’s your request.”

Nov’s voice continued calmly.

“And taking someone else’s lifespan is taboo. I have a prohibition placed on me, so I can’t do that.”

At those words, Ellen inwardly felt relieved and hoped that Enoch would not persist any further. Then, Enoch’s fierce roar, like that of a wild beast, pierced her ears.

“Then? What method is there? Do something with that great time magic of yours! Damn it! …Please, I’m begging you like this. If there’s a way to save Ellen…”

Ellen gaped in disbelief, unable to believe what she was hearing. Is this man actually pleading with someone else? Enoch Bayern?

“Your Grace, please don’t do this. Please get up.”

…Could he have even knelt down?

Ellen was utterly shocked, still feeling as if she were in sleep paralysis.

“There are a few solutions.”

“…Tell me.”

“The first is… the same method I used long ago.”

“The same as what you did?”

“After the Grand Duchess inherits my time magic, she herself stops her own time.”

This… felt like madness. Ellen bit her lip, weakly moving her fingertips.

“Then, the Grand Duchess can live a life close to eternity, preserved in a state where she neither ages nor dies. However, if she chooses this method, she must forever belong to the magic tower. She cannot return to your side.”

“…That doesn’t matter. As long as Ellen can live…”

“There’s another method, so please listen. The second is to use time magic to share and equalize both of your lifespans. This is a kind of loophole that doesn’t violate the prohibition, but…”

“Equalizing the lifespans?”

“Yes. For example… look at these two cups I’ve drawn. The right cup is full of water, but the left cup isn’t even half full. But if we combine the right cup and the left cup like this―”

“……”

“The amount of water has decreased a bit… but in any case, it’s more than what was in the left cup. It’s roughly like this.”

“Yes, I understand.”

“Using this method, your original lifespan will be reduced, but you can die on the same day and time as the Grand Duchess. Like a fairy tale, living happily for a long time and breathing your last together……”

The first method seemed somewhat unsettling, being preserved without dying, and the second method seemed like an ideal solution at first glance. However, there was the problem of Enoch’s lifespan being reduced.

I don’t want that. Ellen, who had been struggling to move, barely managed to lift her heavy eyelids. Just then, Enoch, noticing Ellen’s change, turned to look at her. He asked urgently.

“Ellen, are you alright?”

“……No……”

Ellen squeezed out her voice with difficulty. While trying to keep her eyes open as they kept trying to close.

“No…… Stop, give up……”

“……Enough, I don’t need your opinion.”

Enoch’s golden eyes, wild with madness, turned back to Nov. He was not in his right mind, but he was clearly aware of what choice he was about to make. That’s why he could make a firm decision.

“Do it now, that second method.”