As If Love Doesn't Exist - Side Story Extra 2: Gwiyeon and Ra-yoon (2)
Extra 2: Gwiyeon and Ra-yoon (2)
Once again, the atmosphere at dinner was tense. As soon as the housemaid finished preparing Gwihyeon and Ra-yoon’s meal, she hurried upstairs to her room. She wanted to avoid being in the same space as this young and seemingly dangerous couple. The stifling, cold air felt like it would suffocate her.
“We need to have a child. I can’t wait any longer.”
“I told you I’m not ready to have one yet. We’re not prepared to be parents at all. Why should an innocent child suffer?”
“Did you marry me without knowing I’m the eldest grandson of the head family?”
Gwihyeon slammed his chopsticks on the table. Ra-yoon continued eating calmly, unaffected by his glare. Despite their strained relationship, the frequency of their marital intimacy was high. She found their intimate moments satisfactory, but their purposes were different. For him, it was an act of procreation, but not for her.
“The Seorae Jeong clan isn’t lacking in descendants, and Ijun already has two sons. What’s the problem?”
“Don’t you see that’s precisely the problem?”
“Is this about Baekya Foods? Oh, come on, just live a little. We’re not lacking money, so why do you have to struggle so much?”
Gwihyeon’s lips tightened at her indifferent response and question. Ra-yoon was truly a person fundamentally different from him. She was reckless, lazy, and had no manners. She was like cheap garbage he thought he could recycle by carefully picking her out of the trash bin.
“Don’t you know frowning at the dinner table drives away good fortune?”
She spoke with her mouth full, causing Gwihyeon to frown deeply.
“Didn’t you learn table manners?”
“Yes, I did. The first to eat gets the prize. So if you see it, put it in your mouth first! That’s table manners, right?”
“…….”
“We don’t have love or trust between us, but let’s at least not hate each other. We’re life partners unless something drastic happens, so let’s try to get along.”
She extended her right hand as if to shake hands, but Gwihyeon’s cold gaze briefly touched her hand before turning away. Shrugging her shoulders, Rayoon withdrew her hand and continued her meal.
“I’m not even asking for two children. The sitters will raise them anyway, so there’s nothing for you to worry about. And I don’t plan on leaving the child in your care either.”
“I have something I’m curious about.”
“Tell me.”
“If I were to say I have no intention of having children in the future, what would you do, Gwihyeon?”
“What do you mean by that?”
Gwihyeon replied with a cold expression.
“Will you have an affair? Or will you ask for a divorce? Which way would you go, Gwihyeon?”
“Which one would you prefer, Ra-yoon?”
“There could be a subjective third answer. For example… preparing to become parents?”
“Would that be something a woman who can’t even take a step out of the house because of an affair with K would say?”
“Well, actually…”
Stung by his remark, Rayoon rolled her eyes to the side, pondering for a moment whether to just tell him the truth. But Gwihyeon’s cold voice continued.
“Fortunately, you’re the type who’s very thorough with contraception, so at least that’s reassuring.”
“Just because a man and a woman meet doesn’t mean they only have sex, right? They could be sharing a mental bond or a friendship. There are plenty of other cases of meetings besides that, so why do you only think of it that way?”
“So, have you only shared a friendship or mental bond with K, and nothing more?”
“No, it’s not really like that… Anyway, we’re not really in that kind of relationship, how should I say it…”
Rayoon awkwardly put the spoon in her mouth and then smiled sheepishly.
“But even if you think of me that way, am I so attractive that you can’t give up married life? For someone who’s just aiming to procreate, you’re quite active at night, aren’t you?”
For the first time, Gwi-hyun’s face flushed red. He parted his lips and glared at Rayoon with a look of disbelief. It was an expression that seemed to say, ‘Is this really happening?’
“Huh? It seems like it’s true. I was just saying.”
“….”
“Wait, don’t tell me you actually… like me or something?”
“Have you gone mad?”
“Wow! Why are you denying it so strongly even though I’m just joking?”
Gwihyeon closed his mouth again. He stared at her with eyes that resembled those of a man desperate to kill her right then and there. Rayoon awkwardly smiled at him, then turned her face serious and resumed her meal.
“Let’s have a child.”
“I’ll think about it since you want it that much, but… Well, there’s no love between us, and we’re not exactly the kind of people who would make good parents… It doesn’t seem like a good idea.”
“Even if you won’t be a good mother, there will at least be a good father for the child, so don’t worry.”
Gwihyeon, who was usually not this talkative with her, showed no signs of backing down. He seemed determined to get a firm commitment from her this time.
“Just having money doesn’t make someone a good father.”
“At least it would be better than a mother who drinks and causes rumors, wouldn’t it?”
“That’s just a rumor, not something I actually did. Anyway, it’ll die down in a few days. So just bear with it for a little while.”
She grinned and picked up a piece of bulgogi with her chopsticks, placing it in Gwihyeon’s rice bowl.
“…What are you doing?”
“Don’t frown, just eat your food, dear.”
Gwihyeon looked down at the meat placed on his rice. The bulgogi picked up with someone else’s chopsticks. Even though it was something he couldn’t tolerate from his perspective, he didn’t feel disgusted for some reason.
“Stop nagging and just eat it quietly. If you eat it, I’ll give you more.”
“….”
As he silently looked down at his rice bowl, Ra-yoon pushed the conversation further. Gwihyeon raised his gaze to look directly at his wife. Even though he was certain he had married a crazy woman, there was something about her that wasn’t entirely repulsive to him, which was a mystery to himself.
Rayoon was the type of person Gwihyeon despised and had no desire to be close to. But whenever he sensed a hint of loneliness from her, it would prick at his nerves. When she was in a vulnerable state, she was different from her usual self. He couldn’t pinpoint it, but the fact was that his gaze kept involuntarily drawn to her, against his will.
“That’s to give you some energy at night. Oh, but don’t worry, I’m already quite satisfied as it is!”
“…Can’t you refrain from saying such things?”
Gwihyeon asked with a cold face.
How can a woman not change her facial expression and talk so shamelessly? It’s as if she has never had shame or dignity since birth.
“Isn’t it more ominous to just think about it silently? I’d rather you be honest about your feelings.”
“Since you say I should be honest, let me ask you something.”
“Yes, go ahead.”
“Rayoon, would you have preferred it if it was Ijun, not me?”
Rayoon, who had been nodding absentmindedly, lifted her eyes and stared straight at Gwihyeon. As she blinked a few times, he kept his gaze fixed on her.
“Why would you say that?”
“If I were Ijun, would you have wanted to have a child and stop drinking, instead of running around outside?”
“Do you have some inferiority complex towards Ijun?”
“I can’t exactly say I don’t care at all.”
Putting down her spoon, Rayoon rested her elbows on the table with her arms crossed as she spoke.
“To be honest, I don’t really like either you or Ijun.”
“….”
“Of course, men of that type don’t prefer my style either from the start. And I’m not a big fan of those self-sufficient, ‘manchild’ type of men either… So if I had to choose between you two, I’d still choose you, Gwihyeon.”
Gwihyeon’s facial muscles twitched slightly as he listened to her words. He realized for the first time today that Rayoon’s eyes were clear and sparkling. Usually, her eyes were either drowsy, disheveled from a hangover, or just vacant, but in her normal state, her gaze was remarkably lucid.
“As for a child…”
“Let’s drop that topic for today. Do you know how many times you’ve brought it up already, just this morning?”
“I’ll try to prepare to be a father. So, Ra-yoon, please prepare to be a mother too.”
“Prepare…?”
“It was you who said we need to be qualified to be parents. So let’s make the effort to gain that qualification, and when the child is born, it’ll at least be better than the way things are now, won’t it?”
Gwihyeon said calmly, his attitude much more relaxed than before, as he draped one arm over the back of the adjacent chair.
“If we must have a child, I would like to have a daughter. As the eldest son of the clan, just the thought of it makes me feel sorry for the child already.”
“Being a grandson in a patriarchal family not only comes with obligations but also with corresponding rights. If a boy is born between us, that child will have a lot from the moment he is born.”
He grew up receiving the best treatment from the Jeong family. Simply being the eldest descendant gave Gwihyeon the right to enjoy everything. Looking at Ijun, who had no such rights despite the obligations, Gwihyeon used to have a much stronger sense of superiority in the past. There was an arrogance that no matter how hard Ijun struggled, he would never be able to have any of what Gwihyeon had. In the end, that arrogance did come back to bite him.
“Gwihyeon, wasn’t that sense of responsibility burdensome? Living while unable to say it’s hard, always pretending to be okay, pretending to be mature—is that really a good life? Do you really want to pass on such a life to your child?”
“……”
But can I really say that I’ve lived a good life?
Gwihyeon suddenly had that thought. It was the first time he had ever had such a thought.
“So, Gwihyeon, why don’t you relax a bit and live carelessly? For your own life, Jeong Gwihyeon’s life. Understand? Okay?”
After finishing her sentence, Ra-yoon confidently raised her spoon again.
“……”
Perhaps I can live a fairly decent life with this woman.
Watching her smile with her eyes crinkled, Gwihyeon suddenly had that thought.