122. Only I Can Save My Life
“You don’t want to get married?”
Oksana asked, doubting her ears.
Everything she had planned started going wrong bit by bit.
Starting from when Nikolai returned from the south already married, bringing Duke Smirnov’s daughter as his bride, which she never expected.
Though it was shocking enough for her to faint, she handled it calmly.
She would feel relieved once she dealt with Klavdia.
She could strengthen her power base while simultaneously expelling the Princess who held succession rights from Hersen Palace.
Those who had followed the first Grand Duchess, Yevgenia, and her son Ruslan would join Oksana’s supporters following Klavdia who was marrying Duke Klebov.
Everything had been perfect.
The future she dreamed of—ousting Nikolai and making Mikhail Grand Duke—was right before her eyes!
“I mean exactly what I said. I cannot marry while harboring feelings for another in my heart.”
“So you’ll break the engagement and go to Duke Norbert?”
“I don’t know. But what’s certain is that even before I met him again, I didn’t want this marriage.”
“What?”
“I felt like livestock being dragged to slaughter. It’s not normal for a bride-to-be to feel this way.”
Klavdia knelt before her mother and pleaded while tears dripped down.
She thought if she spoke honestly, her mother would understand.
Oksana had always wanted her happiness.
Though it might be confusing at first, she believed that.
Until she saw the cold gaze directed at her.
Oksana harshly shook off her stepdaughter’s hands that were clutching hers.
“Get your senses back.”
“……What?”
“Do you think Norbert will still love you after learning you’ve already slept with another man?”
“Mother……”
“Once he knows you’ve lost your virginity, he’ll find you disgusting.”
Klavdia looked up at her mother with a wounded expression.
“How can you say such things when you know how much I regret that night?”
“It’s the truth, isn’t it? You got drunk at a party and couldn’t even take care of yourself properly, ending up in bed with Duke Klebov. You know best how much trouble I went through cleaning up after that.”
This marriage was meticulously designed by Oksana from the start.
The Princess who had absolute faith in her stepmother fell into the trap.
At first, she arranged their matchmaking meeting, but Klavdia politely declined Duke Klebov’s proposal.
Though hurt by the rejection, the Duke decided to respect her wishes and withdraw.
“Didn’t you say you were interested in Klavdia, Duke? I’ll push this marriage through, trust me.”
“But marriage requires the parties’ consent most importantly. I believe it’s a gentleman’s courtesy to accept rejection.”
But Oksana wasn’t one to give up the benefits this marriage would bring.
At a party in Hersen Palace, the palace servants followed her orders and spiked both Klavdia and Duke Klebov’s drinks with sleeping pills.
Then they pretended to help the drowsy pair home one by one but took them to Klavdia’s room instead.
Of course, the Duke’s family elders also participated in Oksana’s plan without asking his opinion.
The two unknowing victims woke up the next morning suffering from worse hangovers than usual.
In the same bed, improperly dressed.
They even found blood on the sheets that the palace servants had deliberately spilled beforehand.
It was a situation anyone would misunderstand. Even the parties involved.
Before they could cry out in shock, Oksana, who had been waiting outside, entered and began acting as if she had accidentally discovered the scene.
“What, what is the meaning of this!”
“Mother! No, this isn’t……”
“What do you mean it isn’t?”
“Your Highness, I have committed an unforgivable sin!”
“That’s not what you should be saying in this situation, Duke! You should say you’ll take responsibility for taking an unmarried woman to bed!”
Duke Klebov finally swore to marry her.
Klavdia couldn’t even resist and had to follow her mother’s lead, guilty of the crime of secretly bringing a boyar man into her room.
“Daughter, your mother will take care of everything. I swear your honor will not fall to the ground. You just need to trust me.”
Thus she ended up preparing for marriage with a man she didn’t love, not knowing she had been manipulated by Oksana’s schemes.
Until now, she had simply obeyed whatever her mother said, but she no longer wanted to live deceiving her own feelings.
“If word gets out that you’re the type to carelessly throw your body around, it will disgrace the family’s honor! How can I hold my head up in public from the shame!”
“……What did you say?”
“I raised you to be above reproach! Now ignorant people will gossip. They’ll say I wouldn’t have raised my own child so vulgarly! They’ll say it’s because I’m a stepmother!”
Klavdia slowly rose from the floor with a shocked expression.
It felt like taking a heavy blow to the head.
She finally realized.
That what mattered to her mother was not her, but appearances.
It was betrayal by a family member she thought would understand her best.
During Klavdia’s upbringing, Oksana had used her silver tongue to say only pleasant things rather than give proper guidance.
Klavdia believed that was love.
“And I wanted to show you that sometimes we need the courage to save our own lives first.”
Even Katya who stood in opposition had given such sincere advice, yet how could her mother do this?
‘Is the mother before me truly on my side?’
It was a moment when everything she had believed as truth started shaking.
It was the night when the solid relationship she believed was on her side crumbled.
Katya was right.
In the end, only she could protect herself.
If even she gave up on herself, no one could rescue her life from the swamp.
Only I can save my life.
“Realistically speaking, who else besides Duke Klebov would take you with your flaws?”
Oksana continued making comments to lower her self-esteem.
It was to drain her stepdaughter’s strength to make her easy to manipulate and control.
But Klavdia no longer intended to be led by her.
“Why do you keep forcing this unwanted marriage on both parties?”
“I’m doing everything for you—!”
“Is it really for me?”
“What?”
“I’m not sure anymore, Mother. It seems I’m not what’s important to you.”
Just as the Princess turned her back on her mother to leave,
“Stupid girl.”
“……What did you just say?”
Klavdia turned around hearing Oksana’s mutter.
She was laughing derisively.
She knew her stepdaughter would run to Norbert if she left like this.
There was no turning back now.
“I asked what you just said.”
Klavdia asked in a trembling voice.
Oksana no longer needed to act in front of her either.
She threw off her mask of the loving mother.
“You were foolish then and you’re foolish now.”
“Mother……!”
“I don’t understand what you’re doing after 13 years apart. How long will you live tied to the past?”
“There must have been a misunderstanding. Given that we both still have feelings for each other.”
Klavdia countered her mockery.
She planned to meet Norbert with this one hope.
It was enough just knowing their feelings were still directed at each other.
They could meet and confirm why things happened in the past.
“Misunderstanding? You both just ran away scared because you couldn’t handle it. You think that’s love?”
“No!”
“If you were truly meant to be, you wouldn’t have parted like that then. You had no faith in each other, that’s why you were swayed by mere letters.”
“……”
“Crying and wailing because replies didn’t come. How foolish. Your love amounted to only that much.”
“Mother.”
A shocking suspicion suddenly arose in Klavdia’s mind.
Not noticing the change in her expression, Oksana continued ranting, trembling with anger.
“And now you claim it was true love and want to meet again? There’s a limit to beautifying the past!”
“Is it a sin to reminisce about first love?”
“That’s why I’m saying it’s just beautified in your memory! I watched from right beside you so I know well. It wasn’t love. It was just youthful rebellion.”
“Rebellion?”
“Do you think you would have fallen so in love if the late Grand Duke had been on good terms with the Imperial family? You just acted like you were having some grand secret love affair because your parents would oppose!”
The Princess let out a hollow laugh.
Why hadn’t she realized before?
“I thought you were secretly supporting our meetings without Father knowing, but it seems you desperately wanted us to break up.”
“Yes! After all the effort I put into tearing you two apart!”
Oksana retorted sharply in an elevated voice.
She realized her slip immediately after, but it was too late to take back.
“You hid Norbert’s letters?”
“……”
“I thought it was strange. Even if his feelings changed, he wasn’t the type to not even send a reply.”
It felt like all the questions were finally being answered.
13 years ago, Klavdia fell in love with Imperial Prince Norbert who was staying briefly in the Grand Duchy with his brother.
But she knew her father would oppose if she told him about dating him.
The former Grand Duke Yuri de Vasily did not get along well with the Emperor of the Charmente Empire.
Though they sometimes had to meet due to political issues in the Western Continent, they did not like each other.
Such a Yuri would never allow sending his beloved daughter to the Charmente Imperial family.
Even after the Imperial delegation left, Klavdia and Norbert continued exchanging letters.
Then the two planned to elope, and the promised day arrived.
And that day was when Klavdia’s brother Ruslan lost his life at their father’s hands.
