72. The First Night Has Not Yet Passed

When her husband, who had been offering his arm as a pillow, recklessly got rid of the pillows, Katya was so dumbfounded she couldn’t speak.

“What about the clause about not touching each other’s bodies?”

“About that clause. I think it needs some revision. I clearly have a wife now, so should I spend my nights alone? Even if it’s a contract marriage, it’s still technically our wedding night, so we should at least pretend to be newlyweds.”

“Good grief, there’s only you and me in this room right now. Who else is watching?”

“You never know about these things. By the way, did we… lock the door?”

As they both turned their heads toward the door simultaneously, the closed door suddenly burst open from outside.

At the same time, Katya instinctively improvised by jumping onto the bed.

She ended up naturally falling into Nikolai’s arms.

“Oh my goodness! I’m so sorry!”

The hotel maid, who had entered thinking it was an empty room, hurriedly left after seeing the two people tangled together on the bed.

As the door closed, Katya let out a sigh of relief before making eye contact with Nikolai beneath her.

No wonder the bed felt hard as stone.

“I-I thought you said you wouldn’t force anything!”

She blurted out, feeling awkward for no reason.

“Hey. I’m the one who got pounced on here.”

As she tried to get up in surprise, Nikolai strongly held her waist with one arm.

Their bodies pressed close together again.

“Since I’ve been pounced on anyway, I’m willing to give this body completely to you. Though my heart is beating wildly because things are moving too fast. Want to go all the way?”

Nikolai licked his upper lip like he’s savoring the sight of a rabbit that had walked into a tiger’s den of its own accord.

“We stayed up all night yesterday, so technically our wedding night hasn’t passed yet.”

Katya, who had been silently staring down at him, suddenly lowered her head and buried her face in his shoulder.

The one who had been teasing became flustered at his wife’s sudden action, blinking his eyes.

“Tia…?”

“Snooore…”

Soon, snoring sounds reached his ears.

Nikolai, whose expectations had been high, couldn’t help but laugh in disbelief.

“Well, that’s that.”

He carefully laid his wife, who was snuggled comfortably on top of him like a blanket, down beside him.

Sitting next to her, he pulled up the covers and reached out his hand toward Katya’s face as he looked down at her, who was sleeping like a baby.

Her body twitched slightly as a shadow fell across her face.

Seeing this, he raised one corner of his mouth and gently pinched her prominent nose between his fingers where it sloped smoothly down between her dark eyebrows.

With her nose blocked, Katya suddenly opened her eyes in surprise and sat up.

Nikolai removed his hand from her nose and smirked as if he had known all along.

“How did you know I was pretending to sleep?”

“You don’t usually snore when you sleep.”

“My goodness, have you slept with me before?”

“We have slept together.”

He responded with an expression that seemed to ask why she was questioning something so obvious.

“That’s… true.”

Nikolai had watched her sleep twice before.

Along with their first night together at the inn, there was also the day they went to write the prenuptial contract.

From what he had observed then, she only had one sleeping habit.

“By the way, why do you sleep so dangerously perched on the edge of the bed?”

“I do that?”

“Yes. It worries me. I think I’ll have to tie you down to feel at ease.”

“T-tie me down?”

Could the Grand Duke possibly have such tastes?

That would be quite troublesome for Katya.

As she rolled her eyes around, not knowing what to do, Nikolai lay down next to her with his right arm stretched out.

“I’ll chain you tightly with my arm, so sleep without worry.”

“This was your plan all along, wasn’t it?”

“Yes.”

The snake coiled on the bed readily admitted it.

“I’m really too sleepy to argue with you, Grand Duke.”

“Exactly. Lie down beside me. I promise I’ll just be your arm pillow, nothing else.”

To the sleepy Katya, this snake’s temptation was sweeter than any fruit.

“Most importantly! When a man says ‘I’ll just hold your hand while we sleep,’ you must never believe it! Saying they’ll just hold hands means they’ll hold hands AND do everything else. Do you understand, young ladies?”

She recalled Alyona’s passionate warning again.

Katya tilted her head in confusion for a moment.

‘Since he’s not saying he’ll just hold my hand while we sleep, maybe it’s okay?’

Alyona had overlooked something.

That this young lady might know the theory but not how to apply it.

Drunk with sleepiness and not in her right mind, Katya finally gave in to her instincts rather than making a rational judgment and just lay down using his arm as a pillow.

Nikolai, having achieved his wish of being an arm pillow, couldn’t hide his smile of joy.

Lying side by side looking at the ceiling, he gently turned his head to the side.

The soap scent that Bianca had made mixed sweetly with Katya’s natural scent.

“Strangely, smelling your scent makes me feel at ease.”

At those words, Katya raised her hands to cover the crown of her head in surprise.

“Do I smell musty? But I washed my hair yesterday?”

“No. It’s a pleasant scent. I want to bottle the smell of your skin as a perfume. I think I’ll keep remembering it even after we divorce.”

Though he casually mentioned divorce, in truth, Nikolai feared the approaching end of this contract.

He thought if he could mention divorce as casually as discussing breakfast menus, perhaps he could truly remain composed when that day came.

He had been thinking this way more often lately.

That time seemed to be flowing too quickly.

Before meeting her, time had been tedious and slow for him, to the point where he wondered if it was standing still.

He had to endure and endure through the horrific and arduous present for time to take one step away from him and disappear into the past.

But since meeting this woman, time had begun to pass him by at an unprecedented speed, madly and helplessly fast.

“Is that all? You must like the strawberry scent.”

“Did I like it? I didn’t know before meeting you.”

“Though I asked that way, are there people who don’t like strawberries? Everything made with strawberries is delicious. Crushed strawberries preserved in sugar are sweet and delicious, and fresh strawberries are good too.”

“I don’t have any foods I particularly like.”

“What? Then what do you live for?”

Katya, who considered eating delicious food one of life’s greatest pleasures, asked in shock.

Nikolai chuckled, thinking he could tell just from her voice that she must be making rabbit eyes.

“Maybe that’s why my life was boring before.”

“What about now?”

“I think I’ve found enjoyment since meeting you.”

“What did I do…”

“Just… Simply watching you makes the world interesting.”

This wasn’t good. Being beside Katya kept making him grow attached to this hell-like life.

“I’m glad I went to buy that shamshir that day.”

“Why?”

“Because thanks to that, we met, and you found enjoyment in life.”

“……”

His nose stung slightly at her cheerful response.

How could he not love this woman?

Now, even if he wanted to stop these feelings, he didn’t know how.

“Do you usually sleep hugging Laika?”

Nikolai naturally changed the subject.

He remembered how she had hugged him and rubbed her cheek against him at the inn.

“Yes. But Laika goes to each room in turn to put me and Bianca to sleep, then goes to sleep in Father’s room as if completing a mission. So by the time I wake up, my arms feel empty.”

“I’ll stay beside you until you wake up, so think of me as Laika’s replacement and hug me as much as you want. So your arms won’t feel empty in the morning.”

“Wow, is this why people get married?”

“Aren’t you glad you married me?”

“I think so!”

Though it was a playful response, Nikolai felt quite satisfied.

Katya’s eyes began to droop.

Though the sun was high in the sky and sunlight streamed through the window, her tired body was being overwhelmed by sleep.

Nikolai’s embrace was as warm as the sunlight.

As she was about to drift off pleasantly to sleep, he whispered above her head.

“Don’t drool this time.”

Annoyed at the mention of that embarrassing history, Katya turned her back to him with a huff.

Nikolai turned her body back toward himself.

“I mean you don’t need to leave such a mark.”

“What?”

“Because I’m already your man, even without such marks.”

Meeting his eyes, Katya couldn’t look away from his gaze that was deep as a lake.

It really was a strange contract marriage.

Should physical contact be this frequent in a contractual relationship without love?

“How can one person possess another person?”

Katya murmured softly.

Becoming family wasn’t the same as having complete possession of someone.

Unlike objects, humans had emotions and free will, and above all, limited time.

Someone might think of their loved one as ‘my eternal beloved’ at the very moment the other’s heart changes.

Because love’s expiration date isn’t the same for everyone.

Even if by some miracle their feelings for each other flowed at the same speed and time, they could still part ways due to things outside of their control.

For instance, like Katya’s mother who left this world due to illness.

When she was younger, Katya thought her happy family of four would stay with her forever.

Because they were ‘her’ family, and ‘her’ mother.

But after her mother died, she learned too young that people cannot possess other people.

When her father or Bianca caught even a cold, she worried frantically that they might leave her too.

Using the possessive ‘my’ meant desiring a more special relationship with someone, and giving one’s heart.

So Katya had resolved that even if she married someone someday, she would not give her heart.

She must not think that her husband is truly ‘hers.’

Even if bound by family ties, she must think of him as a complete stranger.

That way, she thought she could survive even if her husband betrayed her, or his feelings changed, or he left this world first.

‘But why…’

But why did this man keep feeling so special?

‘I must not think of the Grand Duke as someone who’s truly my husband, my family.’

I decided not to desire you.

Because once I give my heart, there truly will be no turning back.