Chapter 25 – The Emperor and Empress Visit
Ian Keppel had gone mad. There was no doubt about it. The day after I declared I wanted a divorce, he went to work for just one day and then stopped going altogether, staying by my side all day long.
That workaholic!
I couldn’t believe it. Does almost dying change a person that much? Mother said it was my fault for mentioning divorce too hastily and advised me to stay quiet and not provoke Ian until we were ready. But…
“Go away.”
I don’t know how many times a day I had to tell him to leave.
“I’ll turn around and not look.”
“Just go away.”
“I’m worried you’ll collapse again like last time.”
“I told you, I didn’t collapse. I just got dizzy from getting up too quickly after lying down for so long.”
“Same thing.”
So, he’s just going to stand there while I change clothes? I should have realized he was insane when he befriended Cade. He’s just as crazy. I was so angry that I threw a cushion at the back of his head.
“I said go away!”
Even throwing a cushion felt like exercise, and I was out of breath. How did I end up like this? I felt so wronged and frustrated that tears welled up again.
“Fine. I’ll wait outside the door. Is that okay?”
“Please just go get ready. The emperor is coming, and you have things to prepare for, don’t you?”
“I already told them not to come. Should I tell them to leave if it’s too hard for you?”
“No, just leave my room… and don’t wait outside the door either. Go to the drawing room.”
Did almost dying make him fearless? He used to act like he’d die on Cade’s command, but now he seemed like a madman with nothing to fear in the world. Or rather, he acted like my collapsing was the only thing he feared, and it was driving me insane.
“But it’s hard for you to go down the stairs alone…”
“I can manage.”
“How about a compromise? I’ll wait outside the door, and I’ll carry you down the stairs.”
Ian tried to persuade me as if talking to a child, but I was dumbfounded rather than convinced.
How is that a compromise? It’s just a list of things I don’t want. I’d rather climb out the window. I shook my head to dismiss the thought. If I mentioned that out loud, Ian wouldn’t just stay in the room; he’d watch me like a hawk to make sure I wasn’t trying to escape. I sighed.
“Fine, just go out. Please.”
I sighed deeply as Ian left, and with Jane’s help, I changed into a chemise dress. I applied some makeup to give my sickly face a bit of color. Without Jane’s diligent care, my once healthy and vibrant skin and hair had become dull and lifeless.
The divine energy that once protected me was no longer there. Instead, it was raging uncontrollably, causing my heart to ache with the slightest surprise or excitement.
Moreover, according to Crown Princess Eloise, if my heart was severely overstrained, I could suddenly die. So, the doctor prescribed sedatives. I hated taking them because they made me sleepy, but I had no choice as Jane, my mother, and my mother-in-law would all tearfully insist. I felt like someone with a terminal illness.
Once I was ready, with Jane’s help, I stepped out of the room to find Ian leaning against the wall. Embarrassed, I closed my eyes tightly. Ian immediately picked me up in a princess carry. Never in my life did I think I’d be carried like this by him.
“Sorry, I should have stopped them from coming.”
“Just watch where you’re going.”
How could we stop the emperor from visiting? It’s not just that he’s stubborn; Cade is an absolute ruler who rose to power through a bloody purge. If Ian hadn’t been so loyally obedient, the Keppel family might have been wiped out when he got involved with Celia. When we reached the drawing room, Cade and Celia were already there. With Ian’s help, I gave a brief bow. Celia smiled warmly.
“I’m glad you’re awake, Olivia. We were very worried.”
“Thank you, Your Majesty.”
I was startled to see Cade smiling warmly as well. Feeling uneasy, I sat down. Cade spoke as if giving a blessing.
“It’s good to see you two getting along so well. Now, if the Duchess of Keppel can quickly regain her health and give us a daughter, I’d have no more wishes.”
…What?
“I don’t want too much of an age gap with our Arthur.”
Prince Arthur is already nine years old. Even if I got pregnant immediately, there would still be a ten-year gap. Where’s your conscience? I was so stunned that I couldn’t respond. Ian replied instead.
“Aren’t you here for a sick visit?”
It wasn’t a response; it was an outburst.
“What kind of talk is this to someone who just got out of bed?”
I was startled and looked at Ian. Is it really okay to talk to the emperor like this? Cade, looking a bit wronged, said,
“Why are you getting angry? I was just giving a blessing.”
As the atmosphere grew tense, Celia gently interjected.
“Yes, Ian is right. Olivia doesn’t look well; her recovery should come first.”
“I’m sick of hearing about daughters,”
Ian grumbled. Noticing Cade’s displeasure, I grabbed Ian’s hand to calm him. He was about to say something but held back. I was surprised. He actually stopped because I held him back?
“Wasn’t the Duke of Keppel supposed to be overjoyed once the Duchess woke up? Is there some issue I’m unaware of?”
Cade looked at me with a serious expression. I hesitated. Reflecting on Ian’s previous comments, it seemed many people, not just Cade, had pressured Ian about having an heir.
Now, with Ian treating me well, everyone would likely bring up the topic of pregnancy as a blessing. In this world, a childless woman was a symbol of misfortune. To preempt all that, I put on a sorrowful smile.
“I don’t think I can have children.”
Everyone looked shocked. Cade, suddenly at a loss, stammered.
“W-what? I mean… huh?”
Cade looked to Ian for an explanation, but Ian seemed too stunned to respond. I realized Ian had never considered this issue before. If he planned to stay with me, shouldn’t he have thought about this? Oh, right, he did say he had no plans for children. Whatever. It wasn’t my concern anymore.
“Baron Jodel said your heart should have fully recovered. Was he wrong?”
“My heart is fine, but…” I sighed deeply, indicating it was hard to explain. Ian spoke in a subdued voice.
“I’ll explain later.”
With both of us ruining the atmosphere, Cade seemed unable to maintain his composure. Looking somewhat deflated, Cade said,
“Well, it seems the Duchess is still unwell, so we should leave. I apologize for my unintended insensitivity.”
“No need to apologize, Your Majesty. Just the thought of making my daughter an imperial daughter-in-law makes me happy.”
“……I was going to make her Empress, not just a daughter-in-law…… ugh.”
Cade was about to say more but was pulled away by Celia, who had jabbed him in the side. She dragged him out, with Cade insisting on getting an explanation from Ian immediately.
Left alone in the drawing room, I opened the gift box Celia had left. Inside were tea leaves and a letter. Silently, I read the letter and then tossed it into the fireplace, letting it burn. Ian returned shortly after.
“Liv, why are you standing when it’s hard for you?”
“I was burning a letter.”
“A letter?”
“Her Majesty the Empress said I’m to be awarded a medal.”
The letter had said I could either be recognized for my act of using holy power to save Ian, or the public could be told I was stabbed in place of the Empress, which would lead to me receiving a medal. Naturally, I intended to accept the medal.
Receiving a medal meant getting a state pension, which would be an independent account I could maintain without relying on a male protector like my father or husband. I began to see hope for my life post-divorce.
“Liv, should we go to our villa until the medal ceremony?”
“….”
“You said you wanted to leave the capital. I bought a villa while you were asleep. It’s a nice place. Benjamin drew a magic circle there, so we can go anytime. Mother-in-law decorated the interior herself…”
Ian trailed off as I silently stared at him. He called her ‘mother-in-law’? The unfamiliar term left me bewildered. I couldn’t recall a time Ian had referred to my mother that way. Had he even met her enough times to need such a term?
I carefully chose my words. My goal was an amicable divorce, so it was best not to fight with Ian. Without clear grounds for fault, it was nearly impossible for a woman to file for divorce. I spoke softly and gently, unlike my usual tone.
“Ian, I wasn’t speaking impulsively back then.”
It would be ideal to part on good terms so he might give me some money.
“Was it last winter? When you first mentioned divorce to me after our marriage…”
Ian bit his lip. I tried to maintain a kind tone.
“I’ve been preparing myself ever since.”
“….”
“I was just enduring.”
If I appeared pitiable enough, he might give me the townhouse where my mother lived.
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i feel so bad for ian, hes obviously making an effort to repair things. but then i remembered how he treated cecilia, and then i remembered why im team cecilia in all of this 😓 too little too late ian 😓
thank you so much for the wonderful translation!