Chapter 40. Allen’s Jealousy

Iella’s most fundamental question remained unresolved that day. This was because even Vanessa, the original author, couldn’t provide a proper answer. Thinking about it, this was only natural.

Though not as much as herself, Vanessa had also been living in this world for quite some time. During that period, Vanessa must have seen and felt many things too. Unlike the novel that was merely text, she couldn’t simply deny the vibrant life that breathed, walked, and ran around her.

Moreover, she said she only realized this place was inside a novel after meeting Ailexia. Her encounter with Nix had happened much earlier, but because of Aether’s existence, she hadn’t even thought he was the same person from the novel.

She even said that if she hadn’t entered the imperial palace and met both Ailexia and Allen, if their relationship hadn’t been the same as in her novel, she might never have known for her entire life.

‘The female lead hasn’t appeared yet either.’

In the novel, the female lead’s appearance was quite late. This was because she only appeared after the dark relationship between Ailexia and Allen was thoroughly described in the beginning.

So for now, there wasn’t much evidence to conclusively determine that this place was a novel. At best, only the existence of Ailexia and Allen and their relationship.

Therefore, Iella took this opportunity to hear everything about the novel from Vanessa. All of it—the character settings she had created and even the important parts.

For now, returning to her original body was the priority, so she had no choice, but once the situation was resolved, she planned to investigate. Shouldn’t she at least know whether the world she lived in was real or not?

‘Once I return, it will be time for the female lead to appear.’

Then Iella would only need to watch the situation unfold from afar. Whether it would flow like the novel—Nix encouraging Allen, Allen killing Ailexia, and Allen returning to his homeland to be with the female lead.

‘But what if this place really is inside a novel?’

She wasn’t shocked by the fact that she might be an existence that didn’t even appear in the novel, not even as an extra. Rather, she felt fortunate not to be involved in such a dark story. Her unsettled feelings stemmed from a different reason.

‘What becomes of the pain and wounds Allen feels?’

As she listened to the entire novel, she naturally learned everything about Allen’s past and the hardships he would face in the future. When she heard it all, Iella presumptively thought:

‘I know it’s excessive worry, but……’

It was a thought that would upset him if he knew. “Who do you think you are?” It was exactly the kind of thought that would elicit such a response.

In fact, even to her, it felt like arrogance from someone unbound by text. In a way, it was also deception. She had the freedom to say that everything she saw and felt was reality, but he didn’t.

‘How would it feel to know that everything I’ve experienced was created by someone else?’

Iella couldn’t even dare to imagine. What vaguely came to mind was the feeling of being completely denied as a person. And he would probably feel unjust about why he, of all people, had to endure such hardships.

‘He just…… wanted a place where he belonged. That’s all he wanted…… Just like I did in my past life.’

Yes. This was the one reason why Iella started to care about and worry for Allen.

Now that she knew his entire past, she kept seeing her past self overlapping with him. Seo Ira, who had struggled desperately to create a place for herself.

Was it a sense of kinship?

‘Still, thanks to Seon, I decided where my place should be.’

Of course, she had to work hard even after that. Even more so than when aiming for an ordinary place. To remain by Kang Seon’s side, she first had to continuously prove her usefulness to her family.

Despite all that effort, she ended up dying at twenty.

‘That’s all in the past now.’

Iella, who had been reminiscing about the past, lightly slapped her cheeks twice. There would be plenty of time for sentimentality after resolving the current situation.

She carefully thought about her plans for after Nix’s search was completed. Feeling unsettled and thinking her mind was getting stiff from staying inside, she came out to the corridor, which seemed to help change her mood.

At that moment, she saw a familiar silhouette on the opposite side.

‘…Allen?’

It was the moment when her effort to choose the corridor instead of the garden just in case became futile.

‘W-what should I do?’

They say speak of the devil and he shall appear, but how could he be right in front of her now?

A flustered Iella looked around. However, there was nowhere suitable to hide. The thick pillar caught her eye, but it didn’t seem reliable.

‘Hasn’t he noticed me yet?’

Fortunately, Allen didn’t seem to have noticed her presence yet. He was quietly gazing at the garden outside the corridor.

After a moment of contemplation, Iella slowly turned around. She took quiet steps, suppressing even the sound of her breathing. But as always, things never went as planned in such moments.

Tap. Her toe hit a small pebble she hadn’t even known was there. The sound of the pebble rolling across the smooth, hard floor echoed in the quiet space.

Iella froze in place.

‘Please don’t let him hear. Please don’t let him hear.’

“Lady Ailexia?”

As the sound of the pebble stopped, a voice that betrayed Iella’s desperate wish followed. Reflexively squeezing her eyes shut, Iella had a brief moment of inner conflict.

‘Should I ignore him? Pretend I didn’t hear and leave?’

But it seemed the moment didn’t even wait for her, as she felt a presence behind her. Before Iella could react, a large hand touched her wrist, and her body was quickly turned around.

He appeared right in front of her.

“Why don’t you acknowledge me when you hear me.”

Surprisingly, he seemed calmer than usual. No, perhaps “subdued” was the right expression. Iella blinked at his quietly resonating voice and then looked down at her captured wrist.

Allen then loosened his grip. Seeing the relaxing pressure, Iella realized he had misunderstood her gaze to mean that the part he was holding hurt. But she didn’t bother to correct him.

“Lady Ailexia.”

Allen called her as if urging a response. Iella took her gaze away from his hand, which seemed unlikely to let go easily despite loosening its grip, and looked at him again.

His violet eyes were quietly staring at her.

Suddenly, Iella felt guilty.

‘I feel like a thief who rummaged through someone else’s past.’

It was more than just a feeling; it was the truth. Even though she had heard it as something from a novel, it was clearly his past, and Iella had listened to all of it in detail, so she had indeed stolen a glimpse of someone else’s past.

She knew everything: how he was born as an illegitimate child and abused as the royal family’s illicit fruit, living as if dead in a corner where it was difficult to feel even a ray of sunlight or a breath of fresh air; how despite not dying, he was abandoned to the Empire under the pretext of being a hostage for peace.

She also knew that he was being terribly broken by the hand of Ailexia, whom he had thought was his salvation.

“…I was about to turn around.”

Perhaps because of this, she couldn’t treat him harshly. She couldn’t sharply act as Ailexia would have. Her conscience pricked her too much before she could.

‘I’m sorry for knowing without permission. I’m sorry.’

Iella kept apologizing to him in her heart. In truth, until she met him, she hadn’t expected to feel such guilt. Perhaps that’s why it hit her even harder.

“Ah, then I caught Lady Ailexia before you could turn around.”

“……”

“What brings you here?”

He asked again with a meaningless chuckle. Iella pondered what answer to give and chose the most neutral response.

“I just wanted to walk here today.”

Normally, she should have followed this with a vicious questioning of whether he was in a place he shouldn’t be, but strangely, the words wouldn’t come out. It was as if the image of a young, scarred version of him kept flickering before her eyes.

Iella eventually turned her gaze away. She felt like something terrible would happen if she kept looking.

‘Get a grip. I’m Ailexia now. That person doesn’t act this gently!’

She tried to compose herself inwardly, but her thoughts darted in an unexpected direction. One she had never considered before.

‘…No. On the contrary, couldn’t the situation change if I treat him well?’

Why had she only thought about pretending to be Ailexia until now? Sometimes people do reform. There was no reason Ailexia couldn’t do the same.

According to Nix’s analysis, her imitation was already insufficient and awkward in many ways. It was only a matter of time before suspicions arose. Then what if she behaved differently from usual, citing a change of heart as the reason?

‘No. What if Allen gets hurt more after Ailexia returns later because I did that?’

But she quickly came to her senses again.

If she were to continue living as Ailexia, it might be worth trying, but she was determined to return to her original body. Therefore, such behavior would only cause confusion to Allen and those around him.

“You seem different today.”

At that moment, Allen, who had been quiet, spoke to her. Not knowing Iella’s rapidly changing thoughts, to him she simply appeared quieter than usual.

Allen, capturing her deep pink eyes in his sight, couldn’t help but ask.

“A few days ago…… did you invite a red-haired man into your bedroom.”

‘Red-haired man into the bedroom?’ Iella, not immediately understanding his words, soon realized that the man Allen was referring to was Nix.

They did have their conversation in the bedroom, so if that’s what he meant, then yes, she had.

“Why do you ask?”

“I saw him leaving the secondary palace at dawn.”

‘And?’ Iella couldn’t understand what he was trying to say. It didn’t seem like he was asking just to confirm.

Noticing her puzzlement, he hesitated before finally moving his lips.

“……Did you enjoy it.”