Alendia quickly noticed the discomfort on my face and added an explanation.

“My magic is really insignificant compared to yours, healer. Honestly, how much magic could it possibly take to activate that small mark on the prince’s shoulder? Anyone besides me could have done it.”

With a slightly troubled expression, she continued.

“When I first realized I had magic, I was thrilled just to have a special talent. But when I discovered that with such a small amount of power, I couldn’t accomplish anything significant, I felt hopeless. So I devoured every book I could find and studied like a madwoman, but I couldn’t enhance my innate abilities. As you well know.”

What Alendia said was true. Magic was much like a person’s height; just as you can’t change your height at will, magic can’t be adjusted by external forces.

Because of this, accidents often occurred at the academy. A long-standing false belief that one could steal another’s magic had taken root like a ghost story.

In my case, especially, the amount of magic I possessed was overwhelming, to the point where there was no one to compare with, not even my mentor. It was almost inevitable that I was attacked by upperclassmen just when I had barely learned to write. The desire for strong power often blinded people. However, no matter how much one desired it, it was impossible to make the unattainable attainable.

I shook my head.

“I’m sorry, but it’s impossible, whether it’s in the realm of healing or not.”

“Have you ever tried?”

Alendia asked, almost challenging me, but my answer was firm.

“No, and I never will.”

“Please, can’t you just consider it deeply for once? If I were as strong as you, I wouldn’t be vulnerable to ridiculous threats to my life, and I could fulfill the role of a healer in this principality. How many more people could I help then?”

She clasped her hands tightly together, pleading in prayer. I watched her quietly for a moment before sighing.

“Alendia, listen carefully. Pure magic, not magic altered for healing, cannot be transferred. This has been proven through a long history at the academy. Even if it were possible, I can’t even begin to estimate how much power I would have to pour into you. Healing magic relies on life force, and I could end up dying.”

“I… I didn’t know that at all.”

Alendia’s eyes widened in shock at my words.

“I couldn’t find a single book on healing… If I had known, I wouldn’t have come to see you…”

“I understand. All academy books are prohibited from being taken out.”

The academy itself was a powerful symbol of the empire’s might. Whether in small skirmishes or large wars, the moment a systematically trained healer went to the rear, the empire’s forces were virtually limitless. Therefore, it was only natural for the empire to keep all information related to the academy top secret.

I gently held her hands, which were floating in the air, unmoving.

“I’m sorry I can’t help you.”

“No, it’s fine. I really, really didn’t know. I didn’t know healing worked that way. But if it relies on life force, then when exactly do you—”

As Alendia spoke apologetically, she suddenly clamped her mouth shut. It was a question I had heard often, so I replied with a smile.

“You’re curious about when I might die, right? Those who have enough magic to be healers can live nearly four or five times longer than ordinary people. I can live even longer. Although I can’t know exactly when it will end, if I live diligently fulfilling my duties, I will meet death much like ordinary people do.”

“That’s amazing…”

Nodding in agreement, I couldn’t help but feel a sudden wave of bitterness. It was astonishing to realize that I had depleted such an enormous amount of magic in just a few years. In this life, I vowed never to squander my power so meaninglessly again.

“But Alendia, with all your studies, what kinds of things have you read? Are there really that many texts about using magic without healing? I can’t quite imagine it.”

I had read countless books as part of my research, but Alendia was the first ordinary mage I had encountered, and I couldn’t even guess what they learned.

“Well, what comes to mind is… things like how to handle magic precisely, the range and methods of influencing others, the types of forbidden magic, or general rules about using magic.”

“There’s more content than I expected. That’s fascinating.”

“It’s interesting but also dangerous. Come to think of it, according to what you said, my attempt to enhance my magic would be considered forbidden magic. It’s going against the natural order.”

Suddenly, my mentor’s voice echoed in my head.

‘Those who go against the natural order shall never be forgiven by the gods.’

It was a stern warning I had heard when I returned to the past to seek my mentor’s guidance.

Several chaotic thoughts suddenly surfaced.

“Alendia, what kinds of things go against the natural order? I’m curious because I wasn’t aware of this.”

“It’s literally what it sounds like. Reviving the dead, trying to spy on the divine realm, seeing the future… or turning back time.”

“Turning back time…?”

My voice trembled slightly with tension.

What if my return to the past wasn’t a blessing from the gods but something achieved by human will?

“How… is such a thing possible?”

Who would do this, and for what purpose?

“It’s theoretically explained, but it’s impossible to execute.”

Alendia shook her head emphatically and gave a faint smile.

“There are various types of magic, but only magic with properties completely opposite to existing magic can perform such forbidden acts.”

“If it’s the opposite of existing magic…”

“Your magic and mine are altruistic in nature. They can’t be used to harm others; they simply won’t function that way. But the opposite is different. Magic that harms others, a kind of destructive force, can perform forbidden acts. In essence, it can destroy even the existing order.”

The strength slowly left my hands, which had been clasping Alendia’s.

‘Actually, when I was young, I had magic. Unlike yours, it was the kind that attacked others.’

But Leopold had said “when I was young,” using the past tense.

‘It sounds terrifying, but there’s nothing to fear. Such power disappeared long ago.’

Had it really vanished?

The knights of the Lawrence family often spoke with a mix of fear and admiration about how strong Leopold was. They claimed that a single glance from him could make a person faint or that drawing his sword would send the beasts of the White Forest running. I thought they were just exaggerating tales from people who liked to embellish stories.

But what if their stories were true? What if Leopold still possessed and used magic even after becoming an adult…?

My heart began to race uncontrollably.

“Just out of pure academic curiosity, what do the books say about the process of turning back time or its results?”

“It’s quite lengthy… I should lend you the book instead. I went through a lot to get it, so there might be content you’ve never encountered before.”

“Could you really do that? Thank you!”

Eager to respond before she changed her mind, I answered quickly, and Alendia smiled as she stood up.

“Yes, then I’ll be going now. Sorry for staying so late. I’ll send the book through a servant early tomorrow morning, so feel free to take your time with it.”

***

⌈Chapter 9. Returning to the Past⌋

⌈… In conclusion, unlike the taboos discussed in previous chapters, returning to the past requires the caster’s utmost patience. This is because an equal amount of future time must be sacrificed to go back from the current point (hereafter α) to the desired point in time (hereafter β).

For example, if you want to go back one year, you must sacrifice one year of the future. If five years, then five years must be sacrificed. If you wish to return ten years, you must perform the same act daily for ten years from the moment the regression magic circle is activated, waiting for the magic to complete.

The problem is that as this time lengthens, the physical burden on the caster also increases. While it’s not too difficult to recover a damaged body after a day or two, or even a few weeks, if it extends to a year, it could be life-threatening.

The process is also not smooth. Those who wish to return often do so to erase their mistakes. By using blood and magic to draw the regression magic circle presented below, the caster must relive the time from α to β. They are forced to re-experience the past exactly as it was, which could be extremely painful for someone trying to change it.

Moreover, only the caster retains all memories, which tends to fuel an excessive desire to change the future. This is why they often fail even after painstakingly returning…⌋

***

Unable to bring myself to close the last chapter, I spent the entire day rereading the same page.

What particularly confused me was the part about the caster’s memory. Despite not being the caster, I retained memories from before the regression, and everyone I met, including Jayden and my mentor, seemed completely unaware of the regression. They treated me exactly as they had before.

Except for Leopold.