Chapter 23

The warmth of the parlor enveloped the room. Phyllis glanced out the window and spoke.

“Wasn’t it cold on the way here? You should have called for me.”

The wind was growing stronger as the sun set. He felt guilty toward Karina, who had come through this weather.

“It’s fine.”

“Next time, let me know in advance. I’ll send a carriage or something.”

Karina silently lowered her gaze. Feeling awkward, Phyllis picked up his teacup. The air remained tense for a moment. Once again, it was Phyllis who broke the silence.

“The book you recommended a few days ago—Cornell seems to be enjoying it.”

He was relieved to have something to talk about. Phyllis deliberately continued in a bright tone.

“She must have stayed up all night reading it because she’s been sleeping in late lately.”

“I’m glad she found it interesting.”

Karina responded with a nod as she set down her teacup.

As expected, her words lacked any real emotion. It was the same feeling she’d had on the day their family dinner was canceled and the three of them had gathered. Just as Phyllis was about to share what had been on his mind since that day, Karina spoke first.

“By the way, speaking of which…”

For the first time, Karina initiated the conversation. Phyllis, who felt strangely glad, froze at her next words.

“How are you planning to hold your engagement ceremony with Cornell?”

“…”

“I realized I haven’t heard anything about it.”

Karina added nonchalantly. Her tone was as indifferent as if she were asking about the breakfast menu. That attitude made Phyllis hesitate even more. In the end, he couldn’t bring himself to say what he had intended.

“Well… I haven’t really thought about it much.”

Even to himself, his answer sounded pathetic. Phyllis quickly corrected himself.

“For now, I’m thinking of keeping it private. What matters most is our feelings for each other, and besides, it’s just an engagement ceremony.”

Even though he was only stating the facts, it somehow felt insufficient. Phyllis forced a smile to appear as natural as possible.

Karina, who had been silent for a moment, lowered her head. The sound of her sigh was clearly audible. Phyllis looked at her in confusion. Without meeting his gaze, Karina twisted her lips as if biting them.

“What’s wrong, Karina?”

“It’s nothing. It’s just… I feel like you’re forgetting something.”

Her sudden remark made Phyllis tilt his head in confusion. Karina leaned back in her chair without even looking at him. A cynical air surrounded the two of them. It was an unfamiliar atmosphere that Phyllis had never felt before.

“Maybe I asked the wrong question. Let me rephrase it.”

Karina’s slightly colder voice echoed in the parlor.

“When are you planning to bring up the topic of our broken engagement? To the adults, and to me as well.”

At some point, Karina was staring directly at Phyllis.

Once again, there was nothing wrong with her words. What unsettled Phyllis was the look in Karina’s eyes.

From his dry throat, he forced a single word out.

“…Oh, right.”

To a simple question, his heart pounded as if he had heard something dreadful.

“I guess I’ve been distracted lately. I’m sorry. I should have brought it up first.”

Empty excuses and apologies followed. Karina blinked without any reaction.

Phyllis pressed his thumb hard against his palm. Even when a mark appeared on his skin, his mind remained blank.

‘What should I say? Where do I even begin?’

He felt overwhelmed. He didn’t know where to start or how to explain. No, he wasn’t even sure if he should.

The engagement with Cornell had already been planned. In fact, it wasn’t much of a plan—it was more like a natural decision. The engagement itself was the plan for the two of them.

‘I want to do it before we come of age.’

‘Yes, that seems best.’

‘And on the day of the first snowfall. We’ll have the ceremony in a white field of snow, wearing flower crowns.’

‘A flower crown in winter… That’s romantic.’

It was a conversation they’d had in early summer, during a particularly warm day. At that time, Cornell had looked happier than ever.

When it was just the two of them, Phyllis wanted to cater to Cornell in every way. She had given up so much for him. That’s why Phyllis had talked about the engagement that way. It was a vow and a promise meant solely for one person.

‘Let’s make it happen. This winter, on the day of the first snowfall.’

Not once had he regretted it. Even when he confessed everything to Karina, he hadn’t felt regret. But why now? When he had to explain everything again, his lips felt sealed.

“You must have been really busy. Too busy to even bring it up.”

Karina didn’t wait for Phyllis to respond.

When Phyllis finally raised his head, Karina was looking at him. His lips moved, but what came out was another mistake.

“It wasn’t just being busy… There were some things going on.”

“I see. That must have been it.”

Karina let out a small, bitter laugh and spoke in a noticeably different tone.

“That’s enough. I tried to ignore it, but I just can’t anymore.”

Her pale hand pushed her teacup forward. The simple gesture made Phyllis’s heart drop.

The Karina sitting before him now seemed like a completely different person. Her unwavering gaze showed no signs of hesitation. Her tightly closed lips slowly parted.

“You really haven’t thought about me at all.”

Her trembling eyes quivered faintly. Phyllis loosened his grip on his clasped hands. His mind went blank. Even the sound of branches tapping incessantly against the window faded away.

Phyllis stared blankly at Karina. Her voice, tinged with bitterness, broke through his defenseless state.

“I’ve already told my parents about the broken engagement.”

“…”

“Someone will be sent in a few days. You should know about it.”

Her words weren’t difficult to understand, yet they didn’t register immediately. All he could see was Karina’s cold expression filling his vision.

Karina hesitated for a moment, as if deciding whether to say more, before speaking.

“How long were you planning to make me wait? Until autumn passed and the first snow fell?”

Though it was phrased as a question, it didn’t feel like one. Karina was simply pouring out the emotions she had been suppressing.

“I didn’t say anything because I thought you’d bring it up first. I didn’t want to be the one to say it.”

“Karina.”

Phyllis let out a single, futile word. He knew it was meaningless, yet he said it anyway.

Karina closed her eyes briefly before opening them again. There was no trace of emotion left in her gaze.

“Don’t worry. Since I’ve said it myself, there won’t be any turning back.”

Phyllis’s heart finally hit rock bottom. His open mouth released a powerless silence.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking.”

“…”

“Maybe you had your own plans. Plans that didn’t include me, of course.”

Her tone was calm, as if she had already come to terms with everything.

Phyllis struggled to gather his scattered thoughts. Just as he was about to speak, his disorganized words slipped out of his control.

“Kari…”

“There’s nothing more to say. I’ll be going now.”

Without hesitation, Karina stood up and turned away. Instinctively, Phyllis reached out. His hand caught her slender wrist, but his weak grip quickly let go.

Karina turned to look at him. Her face was terrifyingly expressionless, and Phyllis was struck with fear.

‘Don’t go, Karina.’

The words he couldn’t say lingered in his throat. Karina turned away again. He couldn’t let her leave like this. The unfamiliar sight of her retreating figure jolted Phyllis into action. He quickly stood up.

“Goodbye, Phyllis.”

But the final time Karina called his name bound him in place like a shackle. And so, Karina left the room. Even after the door closed, it felt as if her footsteps echoed endlessly.

Phyllis stood still for a long time before finally stepping into the hallway. He saw the butler walking toward him.

“Where is Karina?”

“She just left the mansion. She said she had said everything she needed to.”

Before the butler could finish, Phyllis was already moving. What had started as a brisk walk quickly turned into a run.

It hadn’t been that long. If he chased after her, he could definitely catch up.

“Young Lord! Where are you running off to?”

A servant near the entrance called out in alarm. Phyllis, about to run past, grabbed the servant and asked.

“Is her carriage still here?”

“Pardon?”

“Has her carriage left?”

The servant, looking confused, thought for a moment before shaking his head. Phyllis immediately ran outside.

“It’s cold out! At least put on a coat…!”

The moment he stepped out of the mansion, the cold wind wrapped around him. The servant’s worried shout was drowned out by the sound of his footsteps.

In the distance, among the row of carriages, he spotted one just about to depart. Phyllis ran without stopping. He felt as if he could catch it if he just ran a little faster, as if he could reach it if he just stretched out his hand.

But his feet, which had been running as if they would never stop, gradually slowed. Finally, Phyllis came to a complete stop.

“Why…”

The word he exhaled with his held breath scattered into the air. The carriage was already gone. He had thought it was close, but it had been farther than he realized. As he watched the carriage disappear into the distance, Phyllis suddenly looked around.

“Young Lord! Young Lord Phyllis!”

The servant who had been chasing after him called out desperately, but Phyllis didn’t hear anything.

Faded leaves drifted across the dull grass. When he raised his head, he saw a tree that resembled himself. Winter was just around the corner. The unusually chilly wind brushed against his aimless feet.