【On Irreversible Mistakes】

Crack.

The sound of breaking glass echoed. At the same moment Catherine startled at the sudden noise, the surroundings were instantly dyed in darkness. Simultaneously, the figures that had been at the bottom of the stairs could no longer be seen.

No presence could be felt either. The previous count’s sobs mixed with boiling laughter and the whimpering child’s cries abruptly cut off.

The noisy surroundings became quiet in an instant, leaving only an eerie silence. Catherine, left alone in the pitch-black darkness, only then realized she was breathing heavily.

In the still surroundings, the unstable sound of her breathing seemed to echo throughout her entire body.

She bit her lips. She held her breath, fearing someone might hear her unsteady breathing. Dry saliva slid down her throat. She blinked while trying to release the tension from her shoulders that had stiffened from nervousness.

Nothing could be seen due to the sudden disappearance of light. At the same time, her body trembled from the cold that seemed to flow coolly through her fingertips.

Catherine, who had been staring at the dark bottom of the stairs with narrowed eyes, groped for the wall with her hand. Soon something solid touched her fingertips. She placed her hand on it and exhaled a shallow breath.

“I love you, Catherine.”

Then she startled and raised her head at the whisper that came without warning.

The sound seemed to come from behind her. It was a voice that seemed familiar yet strange. Catherine belatedly listened carefully.

However, the quietly muttering voice disappeared after shaking the low, quiet surroundings before she could be certain whose it was.

Following that, the faint sound of rain could be heard. It sounded dim like something was blocking it, then the sound of cautiously tapping on the window began to become clear. 

Catherine, who had been quietly listening to that sound, suddenly realized that the back of her hand was visible. Light was faintly entering the surroundings that had been covered in pitch-black darkness.

Catherine blinked. It had definitely been a landing just moments before, but what appeared in her dimly brightened vision was an unfamiliar space.

The stairs that had been in front of her were nowhere to be found, and she could see walls so black that their original color couldn’t be determined, dyed in shadow.

At that moment, Catherine heard what sounded like someone rustling near her ear. At the sudden sound, Catherine startled and froze, then slowly turned around by tilting her shoulder. 

And Catherine soon realized where this place was. The large window that occupied one side of the wall wasn’t unfamiliar.

This was Catherine’s drawing room. However, it was quite different from the drawing room Catherine remembered.

The room was entirely covered with white cloth. The table placed by the window, the black harpsichord, the display case placed against the wall, and even the fireplace…

The white cloths that filled the dark drawing room were like remnants of frozen time. They also looked like ghosts standing blankly.

The surroundings, where not even the slightest warmth could be felt, were desolate. The layered silence was thick, like it had been empty for a long time. Because of this, it took some time to realize that someone was there.

Beyond the furniture covered with white cloth, there was a small figure sitting alone by the window where rain was falling. It was young Saul. Wearing a white shirt and black jacket, he seemed buried in the entirely white and black space.

From him sitting without the slightest movement, a long silence that seemed heavily sunken could be felt. Catherine looked at his appearance immersed in deep melancholy, like a tragic masterpiece.

Whoosh. The sound of leaves bumping into each other could be heard. Catherine turned her head toward where the sound came from. Through the glass window, she could see the blackly dyed sky.

The quietly falling raindrops could be seen falling long along the glass surface. Beyond that, rain-soaked tree branches swayed. Their shadows were cast inside the window, scattering chaotically above young Saul’s head…

Catherine, who had been watching that bustling movement, unconsciously wrinkled her nose. 

This was because she belatedly realized that the scent of something burned was faintly lingering in the room. Mixed in with that, she could feel the distinctive fragrance from wet, damp flower stems…

Catherine unconsciously placed her hand on her knee, then gripped the hem of her skirt that touched her fingertips. Though she couldn’t know the exact time period, she seemed to know what this memory the evil thing was showing was about.

The acrid lingering scent, that distinctive afterimage like crushed grass wasn’t unfamiliar. She finally understood the deep sadness felt from young Saul and the presence of white cloth covering every corner of the drawing room.

This was a space filled with beings left behind by loss. The only thing alive and breathing within it was Saul alone. For several minutes, probably only him.

The moment she realized that fact, she too was drawn into the deep sadness. The drooping white cloth seemed like it would flutter at any moment.

The white feet extending from beneath it seemed like they would softly step on the carpet and walk to young Saul’s front.

Catherine recalled the one who would have been the owner of this room long ago, swallowed her saliva, and closed her eyes.

The sound of rain pouring fiercely could be heard distantly. The end of the silence that had swallowed them couldn’t be seen. However, it was soon broken not long after.

This was because the sound of briefly knocking on the door like tapping could be heard. Catherine opened her eyes.

However, young Saul was still there in the same place. He was lost in thoughts so deep that he couldn’t hear the knocking sound. This continued until the knocking sound was heard again, followed by the sound of the door quietly opening.

At the sound of the door opening, young Saul, who finally noticed, raised his head. And seeing the priest standing outside the door, he slowly blinked like awakening from a dream.

“…Eli.”

At the quietly calling voice, a thin crack formed in the heavy, damp air. That crack shattered completely under the footsteps of the priest walking into the room covered with white cloth.

“…Young master, you were here.”

The priest who crossed the room with neat steps soon stood directly in front of Saul who was looking at him.

However, he soon lowered his body and sat with one knee near Saul’s feet, looking up at him. Saul’s blue eyes, tilted diagonally, gazed at the priest.

“I came to see you because I have something to tell you.”

The priest carefully opened his mouth with a slight smile on his calm and gentle face.

“Though it’s sudden, I’ve come to give my final farewell.”

The priest’s voice, whispering while trying to appear calm, was trembling terribly. Because of this, Catherine soon realized something was strange. Catherine’s gaze swept over the priest’s profile as he quietly looked at young Saul. 

The priest’s smile, faintly pulling at his lips, felt somehow unnatural. The priest was struggling to smile, like someone who had forgotten how to smile.

“Thank you for everything. To the Count as well…”

“Eli.”

The priest’s trembling voice stopped at the voice that fell sharply without any trembling, unlike his own. Young Saul’s gaze, which had fallen downward like blinking, turned toward the priest. 

Young Saul’s complexion as he looked at the priest was extremely pale. Saul quietly gazed at the priest like he was lost in some deep thought. It was after time passed for a couple of long breaths that he opened his mouth.

“Mother…”

The voice that had been faintly leaking stopped for a moment. Hesitantly, his bloodless lips were soon pressed between his teeth. As deep shadows fell under his lowered eyelids, several strands of fine hair that had been neatly combed scattered over his pale forehead.

It collapsed. Under that soundless collapse, it seemed like more than just that was crumbling…

“Really, she’s gone, isn’t she?”

A long breath leaked out. He muttered like he had heard something he couldn’t quite understand. He looked down at his hands drooping over his knees, those hands that had been stained with his mother’s blood, and blinked blankly.

Under Saul’s lowered eyelids, his eyelashes trembled finely. But why… And he asked with a voice that was just as messily disheveled, spitting it out.

“Can I still hear her voice?”

Young Saul whispered.

“Mother has passed away, so why do the prophecies continue?”

Saul raised his head.

“Eli, this must be something wrong.”

He looked with eyes that appeared black, dyed in the dark surroundings.

“Maybe mother hasn’t actually passed away…”

Like trying to find the faint hope remaining in that deep box where nothing could be seen.

“So maybe that’s why the prophecies continue?”

Despite being in the form of a question, Catherine seemed to know that it wasn’t really a question. Saul’s voice whispering like that wasn’t wet at all… but somehow it sounded like he was crying. And Catherine wasn’t the only one who heard that dry crying.

“Young master.”

At that moment, that clumsy smile that had appeared on the priest’s face lost its form. His face contorted in an instant. At that sudden reaction, young Saul didn’t have time to wonder or show any reaction.

The priest dropped his face, which had become a mess colored with guilt and grief. Then he grabbed young Saul’s two hands that hung powerlessly over his knees and collapsed at his feet like a sinner.

“I was wrong.”

What followed was an apology spat out in a tone that seemed about to break by the priest who had prostrated himself before young Saul. I’m sorry… I was wrong. His suppressed voice leaked out like his throat was choked.

His voice continued, confessing his sins repeatedly like a broken phonograph. It’s my fault. I was arrogant in my desire for your well-being, trying to hide you who receives God’s favor. Thus, I committed an unforgivable sin against you for life.

“I dared to misinterpret God’s will…”

The priest’s sobbing, like suppressing boiling breath, his pouring confession shook the suffocating silence.

“Please, do not forgive me. Do not forgive me…”