2.2

Realizing this, she felt deflated. She had gotten her hopes up for nothing. What could she possibly expect from Lucian Declan, who couldn’t even handle romance?  

Clearing her throat to hide her embarrassment, Iliana brought the teacup to her lips as Lucian rose from his seat. Moving his long legs, he retrieved a bottle of wine from the bookshelf and placed it in front of her.  

“I’ve been thinking about this a lot.”  

“Hm.”

His slow movements turned toward the tray. As Lucian placed some food on the table, he continued.  

“I thought, to fix my drinking habits, I need to know my alcohol tolerance first. After all, drinking habits are actions that come out when you’re drunk…”  

Lucian’s words were deliberate and serious, as though he had given the matter a lot of thought.  

As Iliana watched him set down the glass, she accepted it, and Lucian promptly poured the wine.  

“So, I wondered what my alcohol tolerance might be. After some thought…”

“Hm. Hm…?”

“Aside from how much alcohol it takes to get drunk, there’s another factor that affects it. Alcohol content. How strong the drink is. They say that’s what gives rise to the phrase ‘it hits you hard.’”  

…Wait a minute.  

The confident way he rattled off his ideas set off alarms in Iliana’s mind.  

She hoped he wouldn’t confirm her suspicions, but oblivious to her unease, he continued speaking, indifferent to her silent plea.  

“Normally, outside of festivals, people don’t drink that much. So I thought, if we’re going to test with smaller amounts, wouldn’t it be easier to figure out with something stronger?”  

The wine glass emitted a scent sweeter than what she’d encountered during festivals, lingering at the tip of her nose. It didn’t take long for her to realize.  

This wine had been aged exceptionally well, with an alcohol content far higher than anything served at festivals.  

Faced with this revelation, Iliana had no choice but to hastily dismiss the hypothesis forming in her mind.  

Lucian Declan was a complete novice. A total amateur who didn’t even know his own tolerance!  

“…”  

That was just the kind of person Lucian was.  

An idealistic figure, striving to present a perfect image as the future lord. The textbook example of a kind ruler.  

So, for someone who cared deeply about his reputation, getting drunk during a festival and clinging to her was something that should never have happened.  

And yet, it had.  

Even if he couldn’t refuse the drinks offered by other retainers, in the ideal he pursued, there was no place for a “lord who causes a scene while drunk.”  

The fact that he had gotten drunk and spent the night with her meant he had lost control. And for someone who sought perfection, losing control meant…  

‘It means he didn’t know his own limits!’

To think I had lectured him about his drinking habits. To think I had even spent the night with him!  

Faced with the need to reevaluate everything from the very beginning, Iliana pressed her fingers to her temple.  

So, this whole conversation was about figuring out his alcohol tolerance before addressing his drinking habits!  

“Haah…”

Oh, heavens. How could this happen to me?  

“Lana?”  

Ignoring the voice calling her name, Iliana downed the wine.  

Lucian’s eyes widened as he watched her hurriedly empty her glass.  

“Lana, wait…!”  

She had thought she agreed to his proposal because he was Lucian Declan.  

As the future lord of Declan, a territory renowned for its wine, having a bad reputation for drunken behavior would negatively impact neighboring territories.  

For a leader of people who valued loyalty and honor in wine, refusing alcohol was unthinkable. Even if they outwardly agreed, there would be those who secretly disapproved.  

To prevent that, she had thought the focus was on “fixing his drinking habits.”  

But now, realizing that she was the only one who had given it such deep thought, Iliana emptied her glass.  

The concerned gaze that entered her vision felt both frustrating and endearing.  

“You really emptied the glass… Are you okay? Do you feel any effects yet?”  

“…I’m fine. I just needed the alcohol to organize some mistaken thoughts. Sorry if I worried you.”  

“No, I should be the one apologizing. I’m the one asking you to go along with this ridiculous method because I don’t want to take up too much of your time.”  

The sandwich he handed her, telling her to eat if she was okay, felt unfair.  

The fact that he didn’t question her about what she meant by “mistaken thoughts” and instead apologized made it feel like he was drawing a line.

Her efforts to suppress her expectations and come here felt pointless.  

Any faint hope that Lucian might have had personal feelings for her shattered.

Unfamiliar with the cycle of expectation and disappointment, Iliana blinked.  

“So, you’re saying we’ll measure your limit by drinking small amounts of strong wine, right?”  

“Yeah, that’s about it. Was there something strange about my idea?”  

He looked adorable, which only made Iliana dislike herself for thinking so. She waved her hand dismissively.

“No, it’s not that. It’s just…”

Iliana felt as though she was the only one who had any expectations. Yet, she couldn’t bring herself to voice all the words she held inside.  

“I just never imagined you wouldn’t know your own alcohol tolerance, Lucian.”

When she shared this simple truth, Lucian finally wore an expression of understanding.  

The relief evident in his raised eyebrows left a bitter taste on her tongue.  

Looking back, it had always been that way. Lucian had only ever treated her as a friend, never as a romantic interest.  

The reason he made this suggestion in the first place was likely because Iliana held the title of “close childhood friend.”  

It was a trust born from the belief that she was on his side, someone who wouldn’t mind if he wasn’t perfect.  

This precarious sense of satisfaction was slowly killing Iliana’s feelings for him, partly because her own desires were growing.  

So she told herself: 

He must never find out. Never.

“During the coming-of-age ceremony, I thought you knew and controlled yourself.”  

Having composed herself, Iliana revealed her empty wine glass. Lucian’s face brightened visibly.  

“It was the opposite. Ironically, I didn’t even have time to drink during the coming-of-age ceremony.”  

As he refilled her glass, Lucian set the bottle on the table and sat beside her.  

The unusually close distance made her mind go blank. She wondered why he had chosen to sit next to her but didn’t voice her question. After all, it was to her benefit.  

Iliana ignored the selfish thoughts creeping out and focused on the conversation.  

“After the coming-of-age ceremony, it must have been hard to attend banquets due to the drought… So this is your second time?”  

“Something like that. I drank out of courtesy, though.”  

The atmosphere lightened. Perhaps sensing the tension had eased, Lucian tilted his empty glass toward Iliana.  

When she grabbed the wine bottle, he smiled brightly and whispered, 

“It’s a bit embarrassing, but I’m counting on you.”  

Lucian’s lips, curving into a playful smile, were a deep red. Iliana quickly averted her gaze from his lips and poured the wine into his glass.  

The red wine clung stickily to her hands.  

“If you feel like you’re getting drunk, Lana, it’s okay to stop drinking.”  

“You too. Let me know if it gets too much.”  

Iliana bit the inside of her cheek and repeated to herself: 

No selfish thoughts. Absolutely forbidden.

Steeling her expression, she clinked glasses with Lucian. The sound of the glasses meeting was bright and clear.  

As she stared at her glass, Lucian suddenly smiled, showing her his empty one.  

“Well, I think I’m okay with one glass so far.”  

“Did you drink that all at once?”  

“The first glass is supposed to be drunk in one go. You did it too, Lana.”  

“Well, I know my limit, so it’s fine for me. But Lucian, you don’t!”  

What am I supposed to do if you get drunk right away?!  

She hastily set her glass down and studied Lucian’s face. Even as her hand brushed against his flushed cheek, he laughed and leaned into her touch.  

“I think you’re just a little warm!”  

“Don’t worry, I’m not drunk yet. But, Lana, your cheeks are redder than mine.”  

Iliana froze as Lucian’s green eyes roamed over her flushed cheeks.  

When she pulled her stiff arm away, Lucian’s eyes crinkled with amusement.  

For some reason, the loosened atmosphere made her heart race.  

Was this really okay? Perhaps it would have been better to refuse altogether.

“More importantly… Aren’t you going to refill my glass?”  

If she was going to falter this easily—  

“My glass.”  

Lucian held out his empty glass and blinked slowly.  

The sight overlapped with the memory of his sweat-soaked eyes from that night, making her quickly avert her gaze and grab the bottle.  

The sound of the glass filling was drowned out by her thundering heartbeat.  

What if he hears it?  

She wanted to close her eyes, but doing so would make her breathing too loud.  

She couldn’t even follow through with her resolve.  

“…Drink in moderation, Lucian.”  

“Thanks for the concern.”  

And this is why I can’t confess!  

Anas’s nagging echoed faintly in her mind.  

Clinging to her fading rationality, Iliana decided she had to make it through the night.  

So she matched Lucian’s pace, emptying her glass each time he did.  

One glass, then another.