Chapter 8 Part 3

“Minjoo.”

He sent the message and waited, but there was no reply.

“How are you?”

He tried again, but still no response. Overcoming his reluctance, he called, but received a message saying the number was not in service. The voice made Gihyun freeze momentarily.

He stormed out of his room and ran down the hill, worried that something might have happened to Minjoo.

He stood in front of Minjoo’s one-room apartment. What had once been an easy place to enter with a key code now seemed impossible. He rang the doorbell quietly. There was no answer from inside. With a glimmer of hope, he rang the bell again. Still silent.

“Minjoo.”

Even calling her name yielded no response. Wondering if she had gone to school early, Gihyun decided to head to the school.

He headed to the humanities building where Minjoo usually attended classes. Again, he couldn’t find her. Instead, he saw a familiar female student from the same department as Minjoo. Gihyun ran up to her.

“Have you seen… Cha Minjoo?”

“Minjoo? She hasn’t been coming to school lately. She didn’t even take the midterm exams…”

The fact that Minjoo, who had been struggling to get a scholarship, hadn’t taken the exams shocked Gihyun. He stood there dumbfounded.

The next day, and the day after, he searched everywhere for Minjoo but only heard that no one had been able to reach her. Eventually, Gihyun sought out HyeKyung and headed to the Life Sciences Building, but he couldn’t meet her immediately. After inquiring about HyeKyung’s schedule, he finally saw her two days later. As soon as she saw Gihyun, HyeKyung tried to ignore him and go her own way. Gihyun hurriedly stuck close to her.

“Where’s Minjoo?”

HyeKyung glared at him without meeting his eyes.

“Why are you asking me?”

“…Minjoo is missing.”

HyeKyung laughed as if in disbelief. This time, Gihyun patiently waited for an answer.

“Why are you looking for Minjoo? Didn’t you break up?”

“Where is she?”

“You used to say it well, right? Mind your own business.”

“Will you tell me if I kneel?”

“Are you crazy or something?”

HyeKyung ignored him and walked past. Gihyun persistently followed her.

“Just tell me where Minjoo is. I have something to say.”

“Don’t act like you care. Getting involved with someone like you will only make things worse for Minjoo. She’s had enough trouble already; why put her through more?”

“…Please.”

“Don’t come near me either. I really don’t know.”

“Why don’t you know?”

“I haven’t been able to reach her since the day before yesterday.”

“…Aren’t you worried about a friend not contacting you?”

“Are you in a position to say that?”

He was at a loss for words. Gihyun, leaving HyeKyung behind, picked up his phone and contacted the police station.

“I’d like to report a missing person. The name is Cha Minjoo, and the age is….”

– What is your relationship to the missing person?

The indifferent tone of the question made him hesitate. He continued haltingly.

“School… friend.”

– Have you tried contacting the family first?

“…The family doesn’t know.”

– They might be with the family, so try contacting them first.

“Isn’t there any way to track her location?”

– We can’t just do that arbitrarily, and even if we could track her, the range is too broad, so you’d need to search for her directly. Try contacting the family first.

The call ended, and Gihyun stood there in despair.

He then headed to the bench in front of the Humanities Building. It was where Yoonjung had worn her shoes. It was also where Minjoo had sadly looked. He sat there absentmindedly, hoping she might pass by or that they might run into each other by chance.

Sorry, I want to be with you again.

Thoughts of words he knew would never be accepted came to mind. Still, Gihyun couldn’t leave that spot until morning. As the night dew wet his shoulders, a security guard came and told him to go home. Instead of going home, Gihyun headed to Minjoo’s place. He rang the bell again, but there was no response. He finally slumped down beside the door.

Unlike Gihyun, who came home late from playing, Minjoo always came home early. Except when she had tutoring, she was always there when he came back. She seemed to always be waiting for him. Maybe that’s why Minjoo’s absence felt so profound.

Why hadn’t he paid more attention to Minjoo? Why hadn’t he properly ended things with Yoonjung? Regret welled up. He thought he would never receive such love again. At the same time, the cold air settled on Gihyun’s shoulders.

He remembered sitting alone in his room, solving workbooks after his mother died. The loneliness he had forgotten suddenly surged back. Tears unexpectedly fell from one eye.

What if he had devoted himself to Minjoo? Would Minjoo have stayed by his side? Would they have dated well and eventually married? Would they have had children and built a family? Even though it was just imagination, it felt warm.

In his imagination, Minjoo was walking laboriously with her swollen belly, leaving Gihyun behind. And she walked away, disappearing into the distance without looking back.

In this nonsensical imagination, the tear that was just a droplet became a stream. Soon, the tears turned into sobs.

The day Minjoo disappeared felt more piercing than the day his mother passed away.

***

He searched everywhere for Minjoo, but she did not appear until the end of the semester. He could not find her among HyeKyung’s acquaintances either. Focusing solely on finding Minjoo, he became mentally exhausted.

Although he occasionally ran into Yoonjung on campus, they never made eye contact and simply passed each other by. Others said that Gihyun had been dumped by Yoonjung and was now in a hopeless situation. Gihyun did not bother with excuses and just continued to go back and forth to Minjoo’s place.

What eventually stopped him was a comment from a staff member in the administration office.

“Gihyun Park, you look terrible. Are you living off your face?”

“…….”

“Didn’t Cha Minjoo take a leave of absence? Is that why?”

“…A leave of absence?”

“She submitted the leave of absence form the day before yesterday.”

The fact that she had been at school for a brief period drove him nearly mad. Gihyun asked, “Didn’t you ask why she was taking a leave?”

“Why should I….”

That day, Gihyun also submitted a leave of absence form. He signed up for military service and went to the army, which he had postponed.

Every time he was on leave, he would go to school. He checked with the department office to see if Minjoo had returned. Since she had taken a leave, he thought she would return eventually. However, that too was in vain.

“Cha Minjoo? It seems like she was expelled.”

“…Expelled?”

“She didn’t submit a re-enrollment application.”

Unable to believe even the department assistant’s words, Gihyun waited for another semester. Still, Minjoo did not return to school, even after he was discharged from the army and until the day of re-enrollment.

Along with Minjoo’s absence, the death of Professor Park Joosung also found its way to Gihyun. The news was that Professor Park, his wife, and their only son had all died instantly in a traffic accident during a family trip. The school was in an uproar, and the tragedy of the Seyoung Group was discussed in gossip columns.

Even though he had despised him so much, he didn’t feel relieved. It was just emptiness. Once an orphan, now with neither mother, father, nor Cha Minjoo. The realization that there was nothing left brought a wave of emptiness.

Gihyun drank every day, just like his mother. The more he drank, the more memories of Minjoo came flooding back. Words that had comforted him, warm gazes, thoughtful actions, first experiences, first emotions, first love….

He could not accept the conclusion that the woman he had once regarded as insignificant was love. Yet, he missed her. Since she was not in reality, he had to bring her back with alcohol. He drank and then vomited.

One day, he vomited until blood seeped from his throat. Gihyun staggered out of the bathroom and collapsed on the bare floor. It felt as if he might die, with all his strength draining from him. At that moment, one face came to mind.

Cha Minjoo.

The image of Minjoo sobbing on the day of their separation flickered before Gihyun. He covered his eyes. Yet, the sound of Minjoo crying seemed to echo in his mind like tinnitus, as if he were mentally unwell.

If she were crying next to him, he would try to do something.

He wanted to remember Minjoo as she was when she used to run to him, smiling just at the sight of him. But he realized he would never see her again. Whatever the reason, it seemed that Cha Minjoo would never love Park Gihyun again.

Yet, he still wanted to see her. Even if she did not love him. Even if she were that Cha Minjoo.

Without Minjoo, the thirst for this emotion would never be quenched. He had to be near her somehow, keep her by his side. Now, Cha Minjoo was the only thing left in this world for him.

How should he find her? How should he keep her by his side?

“I can’t live with a beggar.”

Yoonjung’s words were a reality. His current state was unacceptable. Gihyun spent the night of that day contemplating.

The next morning, he headed straight to the library. He searched for information on the computer and organized the business plans he had been developing. Some days, he visited acquaintances and seniors he had been keeping an eye on and tried to persuade them. In his spare time, he went to the Seyoung Group headquarters and observed the surroundings. He tracked the chairman’s movements.

After three months, he had a concrete plan. By then, Gihyun had borrowed money from a friend and acquired a suit. Dressed neatly, he headed to the Seyoung Group headquarters. Thanks to his attire and handsome appearance, the security did not chase him away.

That day, the chairman was leaving the office at his usual time. The chairman and several executives were coming out together. Gihyun approached the chairman boldly.

When the young man appeared, the chairman and those around him looked at him with suspicion. Gihyun looked directly at the chairman and mentioned his mother’s name.

“Do you remember Park Hyojin?”

It was the best way he could introduce himself.

The chairman’s eyes narrowed. After scrutinizing him, it seemed he recognized Gihyun.