Chapter 1 (Part 3)

It would’ve been nice to sleep soundly until Levin returned, but unfortunately, when she opened her eyes again, it was still far from noon.  

What should I do today?  

She looked around the house idly, momentarily lost in thought. Then, she suddenly remembered what she had planned to do today. 

Hadn’t I told Levin earlier that I would prepare a raspberry pie for him?  

After changing into a thick dress, she immediately picked up a basket, hooked it on her arm, and stepped out of the house.  

“Wow, the fruits are already starting to grow!”  

The garden she saw as she descended the stairs was vibrant with flowers just beginning to bloom. She loved plants, and it was thanks to Levin’s efforts that flower seeds had been planted for her. He had said that looking at pretty things whenever she felt bored would be good for her recovery.  

Perhaps because of his care and affection, the flowers he had planted never seemed to wither completely. They bloomed and fell repeatedly, enduring through several seasons. The environment here was so favorable for plants to grow that even the fruits, which she had picked not long ago, were already starting to grow anew.  

There were the small strawberries she loved, the tomatoes Levin liked, an olive tree that had grown as tall as Levin, with tiny round olives starting to form, and various herbs and medicinal plants.  

These were also planted by Levin. According to his somber explanation, back when she had been on the brink of death, he hadn’t been able to find even a single blade of these plants nearby, which had prolonged her suffering. Determined to prevent such a situation from happening again, he had started growing them.  

After passing through this beautiful garden, filled with such stories, the fence finally came into view. The fence was built slightly taller than her height, making it impossible to see outside without opening the gate.  

In any case, there was nothing but forests and trees near the house where she and Levin lived.  

Because of this, there was no need to worry about unexpected visitors, but there was always the concern of wild animals coming down from the mountains. Additionally, the garden was full of delicious plants and fruits, which might attract them. This was why the fence had been erected, acting as a protective barrier.  

She carefully opened the gate.  

Ever since she started going out alone, she always felt like a fledgling bird leaving its nest. The outside world was both fascinating and frightening. This was why she usually only went out with Levin or, like today, to pick berries in the forest on her own.  

Fortunately, she didn’t feel particularly confined. After all, her only interest was spending sweet, loving days with Levin. For her, simply wandering around the house or garden was enough. Though, of course, the lack of physical activity was a downside.  

She walked familiarly toward the forest near the back gate, where the raspberry trees were located.  

Near the back gate was a stable for Skoll, and since there wasn’t a separate door in the fence there, she had to take a detour to reach that area.  

“There it is…! Wow, there are so many golden ones today! I must be lucky!”  

There were about three raspberry trees planted together, and, interestingly enough, they always bore enough fruit to pick whenever she wanted. Although the trees were slightly shorter than her, they were laden with fruit. Excitedly, she began picking them.  

The yellow raspberries were especially sweeter than the red ones, and finding them often felt like a stroke of luck. Today, however, there seemed to be a cluster of them. She thought about how delicious the pie would be with these as she eagerly picked them. But then, something felt strange on her fingertips.  

“What is this…? They’re all rotten?”  

The fruits squished into a mushy mess the moment she touched them. It seemed they were all spoiled and on the verge of bursting. Just when she thought she was lucky, this happened. It felt like cold water had been poured over her excitement.  

To think that the seemingly intact exterior was completely rotten inside. Was this a bad omen, or was I just being overly sensitive?  

Feeling uneasy, she wiped her hands and avoided the yellow fruits as she continued filling her basket.  

But then, it happened.  

Suddenly, a long sound, “Boooo─,” echoed near her ears. At first, she thought it might be the horn of a hunter, so she quickened her pace. She planned to inform them that this area wasn’t a hunting ground. However, contrary to her expectations, following the sound led her to a high cliff.  

“So, this is why Levin told me not to go any further…!”  

She gasped and listened carefully to the repeated sound. Soon, she found its source.  

Far below, a small path came into view. On that path, countless people were moving in a procession. From such a high and distant vantage point, they looked like a swarm of ants. Occasionally, a few people would break away from the group as if trying to escape, but someone would always chase after them and force them back into the crowd. It was an endless, unceasing stream of people.  

She watched them in amazement. Then, amidst the procession, she spotted a face that seemed eerily familiar. Startled, her shoulders trembled.  

A woman who resembled her mother, the one who had given birth to her, was staggering along within the crowd.  

However, it couldn’t possibly be her mother. If she was twenty-four now, it had only been six years since they last saw each other. Yet, that woman looked far older than the mother she remembered. Moreover, she was much thinner, her hair had turned completely white, and for some reason, she was holding a child in her arms. Her chest, visible through her shabby clothes, appeared swollen, as if she had just recently given birth to that child.  

‘Why do I keep seeing such unsettling sights today?’  

Even if that woman wasn’t her mother, it was clear at a glance that she hadn’t lived a happy life. That thought alone made her heart ache. Unable to watch the woman walk any further, she averted her gaze.  

Then, she noticed a black carriage racing furiously alongside the procession. It was one she had seen before, at the place where Levin worked.  

Could he possibly be there?  

For a moment, she looked toward where the carriage stopped, filled with a faint hope of seeing him. But the carriage disappeared into the distance, far too far away to make out anything. Disappointed, she turned her head and began walking back home.  

Come to think of it, this wasn’t the time to be sightseeing. She still needed to make the raspberry pie, heat some warm water, and clean herself up. As she thought of the romantic evening ahead with him, a hum escaped her lips once more.  

Regaining her composure, she opened the gate to the fence.  

***  

When making a pie, one had to stay in front of the fire the entire time, which inevitably made her sweat profusely.  

Still, the thought of the smile on the face of the person who would enjoy it made such effort feel like joyful labor. She successfully completed the pie, which she had made larger than usual, and immediately took a bath.  

Soaking her body in the warm water, the sweat and the uneasy feelings from earlier seemed to wash away completely. Feeling refreshed, she finished her bath and fetched the sweetly fragrant oil she had saved for the evening.  

The oil had a faint floral scent mixed with a slightly sharp herbal aroma. It was the same oil she and Levin had used the first time they shared a bed together. Thanks to its slippery effect, applying it to her intimate areas made penetration much easier.  

He had said he’d come back as quickly as possible, hadn’t he?  

Lately, he had been becoming noticeably impatient. Perhaps it was because their bodies and hearts had grown closer, and there was no longer any need to hide their desires from one another. That’s why, even today, he might pounce on her right after briefly washing himself upon arriving. If she prepared herself thoroughly like this in advance, it would be an enjoyable experience for her as well.  

With a strange mix of excitement and anticipation, she finished applying the oil and put on a dress over it.  

“…What’s this?”  

It was when she opened the drawer to return the oil to its place. Suddenly, a small box she hadn’t seen before caught her eye.  

Had that been there earlier? 

Tilting her head in curiosity, she took the box out. There shouldn’t have been anything in their house that needed to be hidden away like this. 

Could it be that Levin had prepared some kind of surprise gift for me again?  

I’ll secretly check it out and pretend I don’t know.  

Feeling like a mischievous child, she slowly opened the lid of the box.  

What could possibly be inside? A necklace? Or a bracelet? Or maybe a letter, or even a hand-drawn picture?  

“No way…… ?”

She still regrets what she did that day. That box was a secret she should never have opened.  

If she could turn back time and undo all her mistakes, she would gladly do so. She might even endure the pain of losing her memories and starting over from the beginning. But she couldn’t, and instead, she chose the path of foolish curiosity and opened it.  

As if the heavens were immediately chastising her foolishness, a thunderclap roared in the sky. Normally, she would have been so frightened that she’d run to her bed and hide under the covers.  

But not this time. Her mind was elsewhere.  

“What…are these papers?”  

When she opened the box, she saw papers inside. However, all of them were torn to pieces.  

They looked nothing like a gift, no matter how one looked at them. At a glance, she could tell they were something she shouldn’t be seeing.  

But curiosity is such a foolish thing. 

Why do we have eyes that betray us? Why do we lack even the smallest bit of restraint?

 She made the decision to piece them together.  

“Oh, there are letters. If I piece them together, I might be able to read what they say.”  

Why on earth had Levin kept something like this?  

She began piecing the fragments together, feeling a sense of unease.  

But something felt off. The more she assembled the pieces, the more it became clear that the handwriting on them was not his. She had a habit of twisting the letter ‘S’ in a peculiar way, and that same characteristic appeared in the writing on the paper.  

Did this mean I was the one who had written it?  

Finally, when the fragments were fully pieced together, she read the text over and over in disbelief. It was impossible to accept. The contents were utterly absurd.  

「I wish he would just die. No, if I could kill him with my own hands, I’d have no regrets. Levin. Levin, whose very name I want to erase from this world.  

The fact that I’ve carried the seed of that devilish man has driven me into agony day after day. I’ve tried to end my life countless times, but I couldn’t because of this stubborn child clinging to life within me.  

Soon, this child will drain every last bit of life from me and be born. Then, with a face that looks exactly like his, the child will beg for my love. With a face that mirrors the hell I’ve endured, they’ll demand affection.  

I hate it. I despise it. I loathe every bit of this reality, and it’s horrifying.」  

The words were unmistakably a curse.  

Moreover, every single letter carried a vivid resentment directed at Levin.  

“Wishing for death…? How could I say such a thing…?”  

Looking at that beautiful man, had I really harbored such thoughts?  

Why? Why on earth? How?  

It felt as if someone was draining her blood drop by drop, from her face down to her fingertips. She continued reading the next paragraph with a heart full of despair.  

「Looking back, he and I were never meant to be. Perhaps I had sensed it from the beginning. Those hunter-like eyes of his, as if all his filthy and vile nature was laid bare for me to see. Yes, from the moment I saw those piercing blue eyes—the ones I wanted to claw out and crush underfoot—I hated him.」  

And then, one word stabbed her like a dagger to the heart.  

“What… what is this supposed to mean…?”  

Outside the window by her bedside, a fierce lightning bolt struck with a deafening crash, as if tearing the world apart. Her vision momentarily flashed white.  

With trembling lips, she forced out words in a shaky voice.  

“My husband… Levin… has golden eyes.”