Not only was she furious at being accused of a crime she hadn’t committed, but it wasn’t even funny how he was painting her as a filthy woman while pretending he had been a noble and perfect husband. Moreover, she was even more angry at herself for still protecting his secret in this situation.
Cutting off Rian’s words, Belita, seemingly having gone completely mad, crossed her legs just like Rian and leaned back comfortably. She tilted her head down slightly and even smirked. Her appearance somehow resembled Crazy Rian.
“What have you done for me? Oh, you gave me the position of Grand Duchess…? Did I ever ask for it? If I had known what kind of position this was, I would have refused it first.”
“What…?”
“I didn’t know being a Grand Duchess would be such a boring position. If I had known it was a position where even a mere count could despise the Grand Duchess and nobles could openly insult her, I would have kicked it away first. And if I had known my husband was such a coward, I would never have married you! Though I suppose I’ll live longer because of it.”
She smiled slightly and whispered.
“Since I’ve been fed so many curses.”
“Wife…?”
Belita felt like a decade-old indigestion had finally cleared as she watched Rian’s expression turn stupid. Perhaps because she had become immune to Crazy Rian, her hands were drenched in sweat, but she managed to pretend to be strong without much difficulty. It was partly because her mind had slightly snapped, but the immunity forcibly injected into her by the man before her was quite useful.
“A-are you really my wife…?”
“Haa…… I suppose so. It seems I’ve developed a split personality like someone else.”
“What did you say…?”
“Nothing. Anyway, I’ve never taken a lover, and as your wife, I’ve never done anything shameful. Whether you believe it or not is up to Your Grace. Sigh……”
After taking a moment to catch her breath, Belita straightened her posture and looked directly at Rian.
“Let’s get divorced.”
“……What?”
“I’ll do as you wish. But give me alimony. Ah, since you already spent money buying me, I won’t ask for too much in good conscience. Just give me enough to live on.”
“Wife!”
Looking at Rian’s face contorted with shock and surprise, Belita delivered one final blow, recalling and throwing back the words of the other man inside him.
‘Don’t take the word ‘fun’ so lightly. Not knowing that is why some people end up with split personalities like me. Do you know how important fun is in life?’
“I want to live my life with some fun now too. Someone very kindly taught me what happens when you live a boring life. So…… living with you isn’t fun.”
Yes, that’s it. It’s better to live alone than like this. Better to have neither a cowardly husband nor a crazy one.
“Do you…… mean it?”
“!?”
A chill ran down her spine at the man’s solemn voice as he suddenly bowed his head deeply. Perhaps because it was a familiar situation she had experienced many times before, her body reacted first.
“Wife.”
Belita jumped up from her seat and ran out of the room frantically, as if his call was a signal pushing her back. She straightened her trembling legs and fled quickly in case he might follow. Because Crazy Rian always appeared after that expression.
She didn’t know why she ran away. Perhaps it was a habit. Belita quickly fled, afraid he might pounce on her after her suggestion of divorce.
As Belita suddenly left, Rian stared blankly at the wide-open door. He couldn’t understand what he had just heard.
“Did she hate me that much? What exactly did I do wrong to her…. Ugh!”
Rian clutched his head and bit his lip tightly as pain suddenly stabbed and gouged through his mind.
This pain, which he had felt since childhood, was still difficult to bear even as a grown adult. Whenever he experienced severe stress or faced an unbearable situation, his head would ache just like now.
“Ugh…. It’s starting again. I thought I was better……”
When he could no longer endure the suppressed resentment that he had been holding in, his head would start to ache. It was like his mother’s beatings, severely disciplining him that he should never express anger or emotions.
After writhing in pain, he would somehow fall asleep, and when he woke up, his mind would be blank. Fortunately, the terrible pain would be completely gone. He realized his memories were missing when he noticed people’s attitudes toward him had changed.
But he didn’t think much of it. It felt like he could survive because the memories and those terrible feelings disappeared while he slept. No, he even felt somewhat refreshed. So at some point, he just let go of his consciousness when the pain appeared. It was less painful that way.
As an adult, he drowned his resentment in alcohol. Although he occasionally lost his memories, his head didn’t hurt, and he didn’t lose entire chunks of memory like before, so he didn’t worry too much.
‘But why has it returned now…?’
He had thought it was just because of the alcohol, but it seemed that wasn’t the case.
“When exactly did I start losing my memories this time?”
Suddenly, Belita’s words came to mind.
‘If I had known it was a position where even a mere count could despise the Grand Duchess and nobles could openly insult her, I would have kicked it away first. And if I had known my husband was such a coward, I would never have married you!’
“That’s right. It was that day.”
That day, he had heard the noble ladies being rude to her. He was furious to the point of exploding at their behavior, openly making the Grand Duchess a laughingstock. But they weren’t the type to bow their heads simply because of his rank. Just as he was contemplating how to punish them, he saw her silently standing up to leave despite the insult, and everything went black before his eyes.
He had no memory after that. He remembered trying hard to suppress his anger, but after that, his memories were completely gone.
“So, I’ve had no memories since that day? What date is it today!?”
Realizing the seriousness of his condition for the first time, Rian jumped up and hurriedly headed somewhere.
Belita, who had been pacing in the garden for a while, quickly hid behind a tree when she saw Rian urgently leaving in a carriage.
“What? Where is he going? Has he changed? Is he coming to catch me…?”
The thought alone made her shiver with goosebumps. Surely Crazy Rian inside him might have heard everything she said. The current Rian might not remember, but Crazy Rian had always clung to every word she had said.
Above all, what terrified her most was if Crazy Rian found out that she had slept with Grand Duke Rian…… Ugh…… she didn’t even want to imagine it.
“Should I just run away now? If he catches me, my limbs might be torn apart this time.”
Biting her nails, Belita paced back and forth like someone with anxiety. Now that her relationship with that man had also soured, she was afraid to stay here any longer.
This wasn’t what she had intended…….
Although she had spoken in anger, these were words she had been holding back. She was furious at the man who showed his teeth only to her while never revealing them to others. So her own aggression, which she hadn’t been aware of, exploded. But it felt surprisingly refreshing. Was that why he had split himself too…?
“I’m not much different from him.”
He was right. It was just a matter of showing it or not; everyone has duality. The only difference, if any, was that he had split into two, while she remembered both aspects of herself, but neither could control it.
“Haa…… What should I do? Should I just leave now?”
If she took only the jewelry and money she currently had and left, she could manage for a while. But if she fled with the jewelry he had given her, as if stealing it, it felt like she would be admitting to the misunderstanding he had mentioned. Yet she was afraid of Rian’s sudden changes to stay here peacefully.
Unable to decide what to do, Belita stomped her feet and bit her nails until they tore. Ridiculously, she even wished she could turn back time.
“Should I go to my hometown first? But what if he comes looking for me…?”
As her thoughts spiraled increasingly negative, Belita just wanted to disappear like dust. If that wasn’t possible, she almost wished that crazy Belita from earlier would emerge and resolve everything. Another self like Crazy Rian who could solve everything.
“Good heavens. I never thought I’d end up envying him. Ha…!”
Clicking her tongue at her absurd thoughts, Belita headed to her room.
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Nous_Defions
Her ranting was just sooooooo satisfying… 🤣🤣🤣 I love you, Belita… I love that you’re no pushover, and finally fought back at Grand Duke Rian… He clearly doesn’t know what he’s missing…