3.2

As expected, Vanessa returned late at night. Half-asleep, he kissed her forehead and held her tightly. That was his last memory.

When he woke up in the morning, the space beside him was empty again. After experiencing a similar situation a couple of times, a foreboding feeling crossed his mind. Though it was difficult, he decided to look for Vanessa himself. As he struggled to get up, he noticed something placed on the pillow beside him. A folded piece of paper was sealed with wax along with a pressed cornflower. He quickly unfolded the paper to find a short letter written in neat, round handwriting.

[ To Julian,  

By the time you read this letter, I will already be gone. Please understand why I couldn’t say goodbye in person.  

Hiding me may be the best for you, but I cannot abandon my son, so I cannot accept your proposal. Therefore, I am leaving so as not to be a hindrance to your life.  

I will borrow your money for a while. I will use it to hire a Grand Mage, so don’t worry about me. If I survive, I’ll repay it with interest.  

Our meeting ends here. Thank you for helping me all this time.  

Blessing your future as Earl Hendrick’s knight, Vanessa.  ]

The letter crumpled in his clenched fist, and the dried cornflower was crushed. There was nothing under the pillow where the purse should have been. His blood ran cold.

It felt like he had returned to his childhood when his mother left him, leaving him alone in the world. He never grew immune to someone leaving him.

The sense of loss quickly turned to anger. Furious with betrayal, his neck tensed. He never thought she would truly leave. 

Was my worth to Vanessa only this much? Is this how she repays the benefactor who risked his life for her?

Gritting his teeth, he clutched his wound. He nearly stumbled down the spiral staircase several times in his haste, finally reaching the stable.

The stable master, perhaps forewarned, refused to give Julian a horse. In such cases, one would usually offer a bribe, but now penniless, Julian chose to beat up the stable master. As he grabbed the stable master’s collar and raised his fist, a shout came from afar.

“Julian! Stop at once!”

Earl Hendrick, returning to the stable on horseback, perhaps from an early morning ride, called out. The two escort knights following the Earl immediately dismounted to restrain Julian. Reluctantly, Julian released his grip, and the pitiful stable master scurried over to the Earl.

“How do you plan to ride a horse with your injured body? Don’t waste your energy. I just saw the lady off myself.”

The Earl said, stepping onto the mounting block the stable master laid out. His expression was as cold as ice, having already heard the whole story.

“Foolish, did you think you could deceive me forever? This is how you repay my mercy.”

“Where is Vanessa?”

Julian asked harshly, without offering the proper courtesy to his lord.

“She’s returned to her family, so you should give up.”

“Why didn’t you tell me before she left? You knew she’d be in danger if she left the estate, so how could you let her go?”

At that moment, disregarding the vast difference in status, Julian poured out his anger at the Earl. The stable master gasped in shock, and the escort knights seemed ready to teach him a lesson. The Earl clicked his tongue lightly at Julian’s audacity.

“Stand down, both of you.”

“Earl, but…”

“That’s an order.”

The stable master and the two knights, after exchanging glances, moved away. They watched the Earl and Julian from a distance, ready to rush in if necessary.

Earl Hendrick stared at Julian for a moment before irritably running a hand through his hair.

“You’re not the one who should be angry. You nearly put me in a position of harboring a heinous criminal. Do you realize how politically sensitive this issue is? Bringing such trouble into the family could have jeopardized me with Earl Plar.”

“That wasn’t my intention.”

“Ha, you’re trying to deceive me again. I didn’t ask directly, fearing the lady would be ashamed, but do you think I don’t know you? It’s obvious you deceived the lady in distress with empty promises and mocked her. When I offered to accept you, you changed your words and cowardly revoked your promise to become the champion in the trial by combat. By doing something so despicable, you’ve disappointed not only Madame Cloet but also me!”

Hendrick’s scolding echoed deafeningly in his ears. Having his mistakes revealed through another’s mouth, he couldn’t lift his head in shame. Saying that circumstances had changed since he first promised was just self-justification. Even though it wasn’t his intention, the result was that he took Vanessa’s body and broke his promise. 

Is that why Vanessa was disappointed in meand left? 

Regret came belatedly.

“What you did was against the chivalric spirit of protecting the weak and upholding a woman’s honor. When will you wake up and live like a decent person? Julian, seeing you like this, how can I trust you?”

The Earl, who valued honor, could not tolerate his subordinate committing such disgraceful acts. In front of the Earl, who was pouring out his anger, Julian had nothing to say, even if he had two mouths.

“We agreed to bury the past and become a new person. I’ve given you several chances, so stop wandering. Don’t let father’s last wishes be in vain.”

Hendrick’s final words were not a scolding but a heartfelt plea. The last wishes of the late Earl Arenshen were like a magical phrase that effectively bound Julian. Every time Hendrick mentioned those wishes, Julian had no choice but to obey him like livestock tied by the neck.

“My offer to accept you still stands. So let Vanessa go.”

But Julian couldn’t let Vanessa go like this. He couldn’t give up. 

Forgetting and moving on would be best, even if it hurt?

Only then did Julian realize how contradictory it was when he told Vanessa to forget her son. There was no way to forget. It was impossible from the start.

Unlike Hendrick, who had the power to control others’ lives, Julian was a powerless commoner. Julian had neither the military force to impose his will nor the gold and silver to bribe. He had no choice but to hope for Hendrick’s mercy.

“I admit to deceiving you and failing to keep my promise to Vanessa. It’s all my fault. But I can’t let Vanessa go like this. It’s okay if you don’t appoint me as a knight. Just take pity on this worthless me and help me just this once.”

“Don’t make unreasonable demands. Why should I help her?”

“You always told me to live bravely and honorably, so I will fulfill that will. If it’s to prove Vanessa’s innocence and protect her honor, I’ll give everything.”

With the mindset of going to the battlefield unarmed, Julian knelt before Hendrick. The Julian Hendrick knew would rather die fighting than kneel to beg for his life. Yet here he was, lowering his pride and pleading with him for someone else.

“This is my lifelong wish. If you help me, I will dedicate the rest of my life to you. I will remain loyal and stay by your side until I die.”

“What if you die?”

“Even if I die, I will die with Vanessa. It will be a regretless, honorable death.”

The eyes of a man prepared to die shone more brilliantly than any star in the night sky.

Hearing that Julian was severely injured while trying to save Vanessa, Hendrick had known for a long time that his affection for his partner was great. But he didn’t know it was to this extent.

He had felt sorry for Julian, who could not love others and only had physical relationships since that day. How Vanessa melted Julian’s frozen heart in such a short time, he couldn’t fathom. But after much deliberation, he decided to help him just this once.

The last wishes of the late Earl Arenshen were also valid for Hendrick. He was instructed not to hate Julian, who was lacking in many ways, but to guide him on the right path.

Hendrick swallowed his silence and raised Julian to his feet. When Julian braced himself, thinking he was about to be dragged down, Hendrick placed the reins in his hand. Only then did Julian realize his intention and looked at Hendrick in surprise.

“What are you doing? Go quickly.”

With Hendrick’s support, Julian mounted the horse with a bewildered face.

“Thank you. I won’t forget this kindness.”

Instead of answering, Hendrick slapped the horse’s rump, driving Julian out of the castle.