Chapter 6 – Part 1  (The Crown Prince’s Confession)

‘The Crown Prince has feelings for me…’

The Crown Prince gently pushed my teacup with his fingertip. When I instinctively reached out and grasped the cup, the warmth spread through my fingers.

Even though I was in a daze from the sudden confession, I took a sip, and the familiar taste of black tea filled my mouth.

It was only then that I clearly heard the Crown Prince continue speaking beside me.

“…I promise. I won’t use my affection as an excuse to intrude on your life.”

As I listened to his calm and low voice, I felt my scattered thoughts slowly coming back to me.

“I promise not to use my position as a weapon to oppress you.”

From what I’ve seen of the Crown Prince, he wasn’t the type to lie about such things.

‘Is it okay to feel a little relieved?’

I couldn’t help but let out a sigh.

As I sipped the warm tea and calmed my nerves, a sudden question arose in my mind.

‘When did the Crown Prince start having feelings for me?’

A few days ago, he suddenly started treating me kindly and even took me to see the greenhouse. Was that when he began to develop feelings and his behavior changed?

But his gaze was too serious for it to be a recent emotion.

However, it didn’t quite make sense to think he had liked me for a long time.

The Crown Prince had fired my previous senior maid and quickly dismissed Libby, who was my direct superior.

Wasn’t I next on his list to be fired?

I cautiously asked.

“I thought Your Highness was planning to dismiss me, just like the others…”

The Crown Prince responded urgently.

“No, absolutely not! Why would I ever dismiss you?”

It was the first time I had seen the Crown Prince so startled.

But really? He never intended to fire me? Up until last week, I was sure he was constantly calculating when to let me go.

I decided to recount the many close calls with dismissal I’d faced since I started working at the Crown Prince’s palace.

If I went through them in order, maybe I could figure out when he began to like me.

“There was that time you reprimanded me for serving tea during afternoon tea. It was when Count Phlox visited.”

“Ah, that time. I apologize if it came off as criticism. I noticed you seemed to enjoy tea, and I wanted to discuss it with you.”

So that’s why he sat me down and questioned me so thoroughly?

‘I thought I was being interrogated.’

To think it wasn’t an interrogation, but flirting. It was so poorly executed that I didn’t even realize it was flirting.

It seems safe to assume he had feelings for me back then.

Then, could it be that the next day, when he randomly asked me about tax policies and troubled me with the trolley dilemma, it was the same?

Was the Crown Prince trying to initiate a conversation in his own way?

‘What kind of man is this?’

I was baffled.

“And then, when I served you tea in the evening…”

Since I had served tea in the evening many times, the Crown Prince tilted his head in confusion.

“I’m referring to the time when Your Highness said nothing and just stared at me.”

“Oh, that day….”

It seemed he remembered.

The Crown Prince pursed his lips slightly as if he were embarrassed but then confessed honestly.

“My aide advised me to keep quiet and maintain eye contact since I’m not skilled at making conversation.”

His overly honest answer made me chuckle.

That was fine, but the tea I was drinking went up my nose. I started coughing, and a weird sound came from my nose and mouth.

Feeling embarrassed, I wiped my nose and mouth with a napkin.

The Crown Prince, with a smile in his voice, continued.

“Still, seeing you smile like this now makes it all worthwhile.”

“Then, when you wore the attire of the Southern Kingdom the next day…”

That was earlier this month. The Crown Prince suddenly tried the daring fashion style of the Southern Kingdom.

There wasn’t a delegation from the Southern Kingdom visiting, nor were there any special diplomatic meetings, so it couldn’t have been a political gesture.

As I brought it up, the Crown Prince’s ears turned slightly red.

“That day, my aide suggested that I should try it…”

At that time, I thought I might have stared a bit too intently at the Crown Prince’s exposed body.

‘So he did it for me to see.’

Feeling much lighter, I asked another question.

“Then, when you asked if I was planning to get married and what kind of man I liked, I thought you were trying to arrange a marriage for me. Was that not the case?”

Even thinking back on it now, I couldn’t believe it. It was as if he was meddling like a relative during a holiday.

The Crown Prince waved his hands in denial as he explained.

“I would never try to arrange a marriage for you. I never wanted you to leave your job. At that time, I just wanted to know what kind of man you were interested in.”

I responded immediately.

“My ideal man is someone kind, thoughtful, and gentle.”

I like a man who feels like a friend from my diary. The Crown Prince is the complete opposite.

But when he heard this, the Crown Prince’s face brightened.

“I’ll do my best.”

His words were humble, but his expression seemed to say, “Wow, that’s exactly like me.”

‘No, it’s not. My diary friend is the complete opposite of you!’

No matter how hard he tried, the Crown Prince could never become the gentle and adorable man I imagined.

I cut to the chase and said, 

“I already have someone I like.”

The Crown Prince’s face darkened again, and he seemed to deflate like a balloon losing air.

Even though he looked pitifully deflated, the beautiful Crown Prince still asked me, 

“Would you give me a chance?”

“What kind of chance are you asking for?”

“A chance to win your affection.”

“If I say no, will you stop?”

“I can’t extinguish my feelings for you. It’s my heart, but I can’t control it.”

The Crown Prince’s eyelashes fluttered like the delicate wings of a butterfly.

“But I’ll pretend I don’t have feelings for you. No one will know.”

The Crown Prince withered away, just imagining my rejection.

Seeing that made me feel uneasy.

I’d heard that the right thing to do with a hopeless confession is to reject it firmly without leaving any room for hope. If you truly care for the other person, that’s what you should do.

But doing that to the Crown Prince of the Empire would surely lead to sleepless nights.

I decided to let it go for now, hoping to smooth things over.

“Do as you wish. Who am I to stop you from doing what you want, Your Highness?”

“You have that right.”

As if I really did.

Talking about my rights in a relationship where he speaks informally and I have to use formal language made no sense to me.

“I was afraid that courting you as the Crown Prince might burden you. Even courting you as just a man, I was worried it might be too much for you.”

‘You know that, and you still confessed?’

The Crown Prince’s eyes sparkled as he continued, ignoring my internal grumbling.

“I will do my best not to waste the chance you’ve given me. I will never use my authority to pressure you. …I hope you won’t see me as your superior.”

His dreamy words made me feel suffocated.

As I instinctively shook my head, the Crown Prince surprisingly backed off without much fuss.

He was a difficult person to understand in many ways.

For someone like me, the second daughter of a barely significant count’s family, to be on equal footing with the future emperor of the Empire? No matter how strong romantic feelings might be, it seemed impossible.

Perhaps my thoughts showed on my face because the Crown Prince cautiously added, 

“But I won’t force my wishes on you. I will always seek your consent in a proper manner.”

No matter how much I listened, it all sounded like wishful thinking.

Maybe, in this moment, he truly believed what he was saying.

But does the world really work that way?

Having worked in the Crown Prince’s palace for some time, I noticed that even he went out in disguise occasionally. So why were his values like this? Has he never had a lover outside the palace?

‘An idealist like him might be a good ruler, but as a romantic partner? Absolutely not.’