Chapter 41
Julian’s voice was gentle and yet pitiful. A mix of longing, sadness, and helplessness was buried in his eyes. I raised my hand to cover Julian’s hand, holding my cheek.
I wanted to comfort this man.
I wanted to be comforted by this man.
These two opposing feelings swirled through me, making my toes tingle, moving up to my knees, below my navel, and eventually throughout my entire body. Julian gently stroked my cheek with his thumb and spoke.
“You’re already a dear friend and family to me. Don’t you feel the same?”
I nodded quietly. We had undoubtedly met through a contract. But now, I felt empty when I didn’t see Julian, worried about disappointing him, and afraid of appearing foolish in front of him.
“You’re also a friend and family, Julian.”
“As long as you don’t betray me, I’ll always be on your side. I’ll gladly protect you.”
I couldn’t nod at that. I was already betraying Julian. But Julian hugged me and pulled me into his arms as if it didn’t matter.
“So, don’t ever say that again.”
With my cheek resting against Julian’s chest, I wiggled my head to look up at him.
“What do you mean?“
“Don’t say that this is just a marriage of convenience and that I shouldn’t care about you.“
“… I’m really sorry for that.“
“I’m not blaming you now.“
“But I still feel sorry.”
I heard a short laugh above my head.
“Do I need your forgiveness because I’m the Grand Duke?”
At his words, I broke free from his embrace and slapped his shoulder hard. It made a loud sound, but Julian showed no signs of pain. Instead, he still had a playful smile on one side of his lips.
“You’ve become more playful. You were much more dignified when we first got married.”
I rolled my eyes and leaned back into his arms. Julian hugged me with one arm and buried his nose in my shoulder.
“It’s your fault.“
“Don’t blame me. If I think about it, you’ve always played pranks whenever you got the chance. You must have been a mischievous child, right? I can imagine how much trouble you gave the former duchess.”
Julian sighed at my nagging, but his voice was filled with amusement. He seemed to find my words quite entertaining. I hugged his waist tightly with both arms and swayed back and forth.
Julian did not move in rhythm with me but just looked at me as if wondering what on earth I was doing. His expression made me laugh again.
With a face full of smiles, I kissed Julian’s cheek. I nodded vigorously while he brought his hand to his cheek in bewilderment.
“I’ll see the doctor as soon as we get home.“
“Really?“
“Why would I lie? If it puts your mind at ease, I’ll do it.”
Gratefully, Julian promised not to ask anything or investigate. Knowing him, he would keep his word. He spoke with confidence.
“I’ll find the best doctor for you.”
My trust in doctors had long since been shattered, but for some reason, a part of my heart filled with hope. Perhaps this time, it would be different. No doctor had ever found my symptoms or a cure, but the one Julian found would be different.
Maybe I could keep living.
Maybe I could even bear Julian’s child. Unlike my previous life, I might hear a child’s laughter calling for me.
“Thank you, Julian.”
I was genuinely grateful to Julian.
I thought it was okay to tell him everything. Maybe he would help me with this issue. It was a shameless thought, but I needed the courage to speak it aloud.
We walked hand in hand through the small garden and sat at the tea table that had been prepared. Before long, a maid placed a teacup in front of me. As she was about to leave, I stopped her.
“Bring one more teacup,“ I said.
The maid quickly glanced at Julian to see his reaction. However, Julian only looked at me, showing no sign of stopping her. After she left, I hastily spoke, afraid of what Julian might say.
“You can just leave it here.”
When Julian opened his mouth, I interrupted him again.
“I get lonely drinking tea alone.“
“Duchess.“
“Just this once.“
“I…”
Before our back-and-forth could continue, the teacup arrived. As the maid placed it in front of Julian, I looked at him earnestly. After the maid left, I even clasped my hands together pleadingly.
Julian shook his head at me.
“I was going to say I don’t mind.“
“Really?“
“Yes. You didn’t even give me a chance to speak.”
I pouted as I poured tea into Julian’s cup.
“You hurt my pride.“
“Pride?”
I nodded emphatically at Julian’s question. That was the easy part, but explaining why was much more complicated.
Yet Julian, with his boundless patience, just looked at me without any movement, waiting for my explanation. In such a battle of wills, I was bound to lose.
“…I heard that Princess Abigail often had tea and meals with you.”
Saying it out loud embarrassed me, so I quickly added.
“Well, it’s your freedom, but if we set up a tea table like this, I can have my say later, right?”
Next time, I wouldn’t have to lose to Princess Abigail. I glanced at Julian for his reaction, expecting him to take it playfully. Instead, Julian stood up abruptly.
“Ju-Julian?”
Was he angry? I thought I should apologize immediately. But Julian approached and knelt beside me, bringing his eyes level with mine.
“If you’re okay with it, I can remove the mask.”
I gasped in surprise. Julian never removed his mask, even in bed. He always covered parts of his body with a long cloak, wary of it getting displaced.
“You dislike being seen…“
“And you?“
“Me?”
“You’ve always wanted to see.”
That was true. But it wasn’t just curiosity.
“It’s not because I’m curious. I don’t mind seeing it if you don’t want to show me. I just want to be… closer to you.”
Julian nodded shortly at my words.
“I know, and that’s why…”
Was he nervous, too? His words trailed off, and he looked down, then slowly raised his eyes.
“I’m okay now.”
His simple words tugged at my heart. How could someone be so endearing? I reached out and touched Julian’s mask. The cold texture of it filled me with pity. He always had to wear this cold mask.
I removed the mask from the man kneeling before me, placed it on my lap, and looked at his face.
I couldn’t help but be a bit surprised. Not because his face was hideous. What covered Julian’s cheek wasn’t just stone.
“It’s a magic stone.“
Julian’s slight nod accompanied a gentle hum.
“Yes.”
I placed my palm on Julian’s cheek, which was covered with magic stone. Julian obediently closed his eyes. The cold, smooth texture touched my hand. Instead of finding it ugly, I thought…
‘Beautiful. And dangerous.’
The blue-tinged magic stone was undoubtedly a rare material. I had never heard of Grand Duke Zan’s face being covered with such a rare stone.
“I thought it was just stone. It was stone, wasn’t it?”
Julian pulled back his cloak and removed his long glove, revealing the hand I had seen before. It was still covered in stone.
“As time passes, the magic stone loses its luster.”
It was fortunate he was of noble status. Otherwise, he might have been dragged to the black market.
The thought gave me chills, and I quickly put the mask back on Julian’s face.
“Don’t show this to anyone.“
“Is it that hideous…”
Before Julian could finish his nonsense, I cut him off.
“Not at all. You’re so handsome that it just looks like a unique mask.“
Julian’s eyes widened slightly, a rare occurrence. His sharp eyes rounded, amusingly making me laugh. But I quickly stifled my laughter and put on a stern face.
“Does His Majesty the Emperor know about this?“
“No.”
“It’s better if he doesn’t. Absolutely.”
Only the Emperor could extract the rare magic stone from the Duke’s body. Though the Emperor seemed to cherish Julian in his own way, he was still a ruthless ruler. He had tried to stop Julian’s marriage. Since I couldn’t gauge how much the Emperor cherished Julian, it was safer to keep it a secret.
I pressed Julian to promise he wouldn’t reveal it. While doing so, a thought came to my mind.
‘Princess Abigail must also know this secret.’
Princess Abigail hadn’t informed her father, the Emperor, about Julian’s condition. Her possessiveness over Julian must have been stronger than I had thought. This realization left me uneasy, and I shook my head to clear my mind.
“Duchess?“
“It’s nothing. More importantly… thank you for trusting me.”
I took Julian’s hand and stood up from my chair. Julian followed suit. I glanced at the slowly cooling teacups and chuckled.
“Let’s have our tea inside, just the two of us. What if someone sees my husband?“
“Who would be around in such a secluded place?“
“No way. Your handsome face might get worn out.”
I tugged Julian’s hand and called for a maid. After asking her to move the tea set inside, I returned to Julian.
His face wore a warm smile. Seeing that smile made the surrounding air feel less cold.
TL NOTE: A more advanced chapter of this story is already up on the site. Visit dusk blossoms for more advanced chapters and stories.