Chapter 64

That night, late into the evening, Nife came to visit. She wore a stylish dress, but her carefully combed hair was completely disheveled.

Just a while ago, I thought she must have been in a good mood since she was holding hands with Louis, but now, she looked completely drained.

“Why do you look like that? Come here.”

I gestured from where I was sitting on the bed. Nife hesitated, then awkwardly approached me. I could tell from the clouded look on her face that something must have happened.

“Nife…”

I muttered sympathetically, and Nife bit her lip. The girl who used to cry whenever she wanted was now struggling to hold back her tears, and it pained me to see her like that. When I reached out my hand, Nife stepped closer again, standing right in front of the bed.

“Anna, could you give me a handkerchief?”

“Yes, My Lady.“

“…No, it’s okay.”

Nife shook her head, but her face looked like she might cry. I gently pulled her down to sit on the edge of the bed. She slumped down weakly, sniffling.

“I know that if Louis rejects me, you will feel relieved… But I didn’t have anyone else to go to. I knew it was foolish, but I felt like you would comfort me…“

Eventually, large teardrops began to fall from Nife’s eyes as she hiccupped, her shoulders trembling.

“Can’t you comfort me, just this once? There really isn’t anyone in the world who supports my love…”

I spread my arms wide, feeling so sorry for Nife, who had finally burst into tears. Her words about having no one to support her love broke my heart.

Nife threw herself into my arms, hugging me tightly. She began to cry, her tears and snot soaking into my shoulder. I sighed and patted her back gently.

“I hate Louis so much! Why does he have to be so kind? If he doesn’t like me, he shouldn’t be kind to me! He made me fall for him! I could abandon my family for him at any time! Why does he have to be so wonderful?”

Nife sobbed loudly, clinging to my neck as she vented her anger towards Louis. I kept wiping her tears with a handkerchief, hugging her repeatedly, comforting her repeatedly.

After crying for a long time, Nife finally pulled away from my embrace. But she wasn’t ready to leave yet.

“Your Grace, can I sleep here tonight?”

She asked with a tone full of affection, squirming a little. The cute girl was still adorable even after crying so much that her eyes were swollen. Feeling a bit weary from the situation with Julian, I couldn’t help but burst into a big laugh.

“Alright. Let’s sleep together.“

Nife’s maid seemed at a loss, but since I said it was fine, she had no choice. The maid brought Nife’s nightgown, and we lay beside her. Nife spoke up, her voice still a bit wet but filled with excitement.

“Wow, this is my first time sleeping with a friend.“

“Am I your friend?”

I gently pinched Nife’s nose. She made a slight hissing sound, like “Tsk.“

“We were friends when we were little. But I always knew you would become someone important.”

I tucked a strand of Nife’s hair behind her ear. She blinked lazily as if she was enjoying herself.

“How did you know?“

“Well, you’ve been cool since you were young. Do you know? Some so many girls like Your Grace.”

That couldn’t be true. I knew how many people at parties laughed at me, envied me, and glared at me. The nickname “the woman who married a monster for power“ always followed me. I laughed, finding it hard to believe.

Then Nife suddenly sat up. The blanket was thrown off, letting in a chill, but Nife didn’t seem to mind.

“It’s true. Everyone calls the Grand Duchess and Duke’ Beauty and the Beast,‘ saying it’s so romantic.“

“Beauty and the Beast?”

I burst out laughing. Julian was too gentle to be called a beast. And he was incredibly handsome, too.

“Ever since you married, you’ve hosted parties and attended hunting tournaments together. Everyone envies how close you two are.“

“Is that a rumor?“

“Rumor? I can tell you two are really close. There’s another rumor that the Grand Duke is too handsome to be called a ‘beast.‘ Did you know that?”

“Really?“

“Yes, really! Some brave young ladies have been secretly sneaking glances at him whenever he appears. Even I was shocked when I saw him. He doesn’t look like he would eat someone… It’s like he only drinks dew. Though he’s still a bit scary.”

I laughed heartily and gently pushed Nife back onto the bed, carefully tucking her in with the blanket. However, Nife’s eyes were still wide open, showing no signs of sleepiness.

“Is it true that you had a love marriage? Since when did you like each other?“

“Nife, let’s go to sleep now.“

“Why not? Can’t you tell me? I’ll keep it a secret.”

I patted Nife’s shoulder, but she wasn’t a baby, which wasn’t nearly enough to make her fall asleep. Letting out a sigh, I finally opened my mouth to speak.

“Our marriage was indeed arranged.“

“And yet you still get along so well?“

“That’s because the Grand Duke is a good person.“

“How much?“

“What?“

“How much do you like him?”

I was taken aback by her question. Saying he was a good person, and then being asked how much I liked him? But Nife seemed determined to get an answer, clinging to me persistently. I had no choice but to answer if I wanted to escape her grip.

“I like him as a friend. He feels the same way. We’re lucky for an arranged couple.”

I thought I had answered well, but Nife suddenly sat up faster than before, throwing her pillow into the air as she burst out in frustration.

“Why, what’s wrong?“

“If that’s being friends, then I don’t have any friends!“

“But Julian and I really are—“

“Who holds a friend’s hand like that?”

She suddenly grabbed my cheeks with both hands, squeezing them so hard that they started to feel numb.

“N-Nife?“

“Who grabs a friend’s face like this!”

With my cheeks squished, I couldn’t say anything. My face felt like it was burning.

Nife completely denied everything I had done with Julian in the name of friendship, all the affectionate gestures.

“You two are worse at romance than I am, and I just got dumped!”

It felt like a huge weight had dropped onto my chest. Was I really worse at romance than a girl who had just been dumped? This was my second life, wasn’t it? I didn’t think I was terrible at romance, just that I wasn’t doing it.

Nife sighed heavily, pounding her chest in frustration, before flopping back on the bed.

“Sigh, what am I even talking about after getting dumped today? This is boring. Let’s just sleep.“

“Y-Yeah, goodnight.“

“Goodnight, Your Grace.”

Shortly after, Nife started snoring lightly as she fell asleep.

“Ugh, Louis… you jerk…“

“Huh?”

Surprised by the sudden cursing, I turned to look at her, but it seemed to be just sleep-talking. I gently patted her back, and she snuggled into my arms, holding me tightly.

“That jerk… I like him…”

Tears welled up in Nife’s eyes as she mumbled. Though I felt sorry for the girl rejected today, I couldn’t help but feel envious. That love, where she could give it her all, was so endearing.

As I watched Nife’s tears, her earlier words echoed.

“Who holds a friend’s hand like that? Who grabs a friend’s face like this?”

Could it be that Julian and I seemed closer than just friends to others? Was what I did with Julian that unusual?

Lying on my back, I stared at the dark ceiling. The conversation Julian and I had earlier came to mind.

“Maybe we should distance ourselves for a while.”

I had expected Julian to disagree, but after a brief thought, he nodded. After that, we parted without saying much else. Since Julian left, I haven’t done anything. If Nife hadn’t come, I might have stayed like that all night.

Looking back, that was probably where I went wrong. Wasn’t I expecting Julian to be overly protective, especially with an assassin involved? If things continue like this, I might really…

“I might end up liking Julian.”

Was there anything more shameless than such a feeling? I buried myself under the covers, tossing and turning in shame all night.

* * *

“Gosh, Your Grace, is my sleeping habit that bad?”

The following day, Nife was horrified the moment she saw my face. I touched my face with an embarrassed expression.

“You did cry and cling to me.“

“Did I? Really?“

“Yeah, saying ‘Louis, that jerk‘ while crying.“

“Oh no!”

While Nife shrieked beside me, I checked the mirror with Anna’s help. What I saw in the round mirror was a complete mess. My eyes, probably tired from staying up all night, had prominent blood vessels and dark circles under them. My cheeks also looked lifeless.

“How am I supposed to face anyone today?”

I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror. It was a day when I would meet many nobles. And Julian, too… I didn’t want to show him this haggard appearance. He once joked that I was more beautiful than Ari Eriant… But why does that even matter?

I told Anna to prepare quickly, emphasizing “quickly.“ Anna tilted her head in confusion but diligently got me ready.

As soon as I opened the tent’s entrance, I saw Julian standing directly before me. Meeting his gaze, I immediately covered my face and turned to Anna.

“The sun is too bright. Could you get me a hat? One with a veil.”

TL NOTE: A more advanced chapter of this story is already up on the site. Visit dusk blossoms for more advanced chapters and stories.