Chapter 79

How could something supposed to happen a year later be happening now? Princess Abigail was still alive. If I volunteered for the beast extermination mission now, everyone would be branded as traitors, just like in my past life.

With a pale face, I rushed out of the tower without thinking. I had to quickly get to the Winsley estate by carriage.

“Duchess!”

Julian called me loudly from behind, but I couldn’t hear him. However, I couldn’t resist the force that grabbed me, stopping me in my tracks.

I struggled to free myself from him, but Julian didn’t let go quickly this time. Desperation tinged my voice as I pleaded with him.

“I have to go now! My family is in danger.”

“Are you talking about the Winsley family? If it’s them…“

“They’ll all die at this rate!”

I shouted in a panic. Julian, seeing my distress, gripped my shoulders firmly. As our gazes met, his bright red eyes brought me back to my senses, if only for a moment.

“Calm down. I’ll send a messenger to the Winsley estate. That will be faster.”

While I panted for breath, Bley, standing nearby, spoke up.

“That’s right, Your Grace. It’s pouring rain outside. The roads here aren’t well-maintained, and carriages can’t travel in this weather.”

“Then I’ll ride a horse myself!“

“Duchess, you need to stay calm. You’re not in any condition to ride.”

Julian signaled to Bley, who promptly brought over paper and a pen. Bley then went to prepare the horses and messengers. With trembling hands, I quickly scribbled a message on the paper.

「Do not volunteer for the beast extermination mission. There’s a plan to brand the Winsley family as traitors. – Laila Zan.」

I hastily signed the letter and sealed it as if even one more time spent writing would be wasted. I handed the letter to the person already mounted on a horse, then hurriedly ran up the stairs, ready to follow them myself.

“Duchess, your injuries…“

Julian’s urgent voice echoed behind me, but I couldn’t feel the pain in my leg as I climbed to the tower’s upper levels. When Julian entered the room, I frantically stuffed clothes into a bag.

“Laila.”

I was too frantic to hear him calling my name. I rushed around the room in a panic, unable to properly pack my things, but also unable to leave everything behind.

I had no idea what I should be doing at that moment. My mind was a jumbled mess, and my vision blurred and then became overly sharp in turns.

The past is repeating.

The past that I had desperately wanted to prevent is repeating.

That thought was the only thing in my mind.

“Laila Zan.”

Julian called me once more. Finally, responding to an unconscious impulse, I turned my head toward him. He approached me, knelt on one knee, and took hold of my ankle.

The pain I had forgotten suddenly rushed back, overwhelming me. My mind went black, and I stumbled, unable to keep my balance. If Julian hadn’t held me firmly by the arm, I would have collapsed completely.

“Slowly. Lower your body slowly.”

Julian spoke to me gently, like soothing a child, and I gritted my teeth as I lowered myself. He carried me to the bed.

“We have to leave quickly. My family…”

I clung to Julian’s arm, practically clawing at him in desperation, but he remained firm, laying me down on the bed and examining my foot.

“The wound is swollen. It was almost healed, but you’ve been careless. As I said, you can’t ride a horse in your current condition.“

“But Julian, I have to go to my family.“

“Calm down. Your family is the honorable Winsley household. Your father is the Count of Winsley, protecting the Empire’s borders against beasts. He would find your fear shameful.”

I pushed Julian away forcefully. Of course, his solid chest didn’t budge, but I used all my strength to shove him and shout.

“None of that matters!“

Julian’s face briefly showed confusion, bewilderment, and the faintest hint of disappointment. But I had no space left in my heart to be hurt by that.

“If they die in vain, that honor will mean nothing!”

Saying this, I tried to get up again. But Julian pressed me back onto the bed, holding my shoulders firmly. I attempted to kick him, but the pain in my leg surged, making me gasp in agony.

“Ugh…“

“Calm down.”

Julian urgently pressed down on my knee, preventing me from thrashing around in pain and making my injury worse. He looked straight into my eyes and asked,

“Lilaa. What exactly do you know?”

At his question, the future I knew flashed through my mind like a vivid scene. The baby I gave birth to, my father and mother, Louis, and even Adam… My family had fallen into tragedy. They either died or became slaves.

I hadn’t been there for any of their final moments. All that remained for me was the label of “traitor’s daughter.“ And that life ended with my death.

Tears welled up in my wide-open eyes. My eyes ached like they were about to burst, but I couldn’t close them. If I did, it felt like I would fall back into that hell again, and this miraculous second chance at life would dissipate like a fleeting dream…

As tears streamed from my red, burning eyes, Julian whispered,

“Please, let me help.”

Ah, I had him.

He was the one who held me at the end of my hell and continued to protect me in this new life.

I turned my head to look at him. Julian’s eyes were filled with infinite kindness, and I asked,

“Will you believe me, no matter what I say?”

It was a story I had never told anyone. Partly because I thought no one would believe me but mostly because I feared that speaking it aloud would shatter this fragile dream.

But…

“I will believe you.”

When Julian nodded and gave his brief answer, I knew speaking was okay. I slowly sat up in bed. Julian remained kneeling in front of me, looking up at me. I took his hand and began to speak.

“I’ve lived this life before. This is my second life.”

Julian seemed about to say something, but I gently pressed my fingertips to his lips, silencing him. Then I told him everything I had experienced.

I explained how I had initially been married to Kazak, how I had given birth to a frail child, how I had been imprisoned and prevented from participating in the beast extermination mission, how my family had been branded as traitors, how I had to endure the sight of mistresses living in the same mansion, prostitutes visiting daily, and how I had eventually died without receiving proper treatment.

“I don’t know why, but I came back, and in this life, I vowed to protect my family. That’s why I married you… to protect them.”

Julian listened quietly to everything I said. I finally voiced the thought I couldn’t leave out of the story.

“I think it was my fault that I gave birth to a frail child. So, from the start, I never intended to have children with you. I figured I’d die in two years anyway, so it didn’t matter. In other words, I deceived you into this marriage.”

I lowered my head. While I had my desperate reasons, Julian also had his own hopes and dreams. From the beginning, I had decided to waste two years of his life.

“I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for what I did.”

I expected him to be angry. Whether he called me insane or selfish, I thought he would be justified in his anger. But instead, Julian gently wrapped his hands around my knee and said,

“You didn’t have a choice.”

I lifted my head slightly. Julian’s eyes were filled with confusion. The story I had told him was hard to believe. Yet, he had promised to think of me and was doing his best to keep that promise.

“Anyone would feel like they were standing on the edge of a cliff after going through something like that.”

He was even comforting me. My lips trembled as I tried to respond. Should I thank him? Apologize?

I didn’t know what to say first, so the words that came out of my mouth were selfish.

“Will you… forgive me?“

“Hmm.”

Julian reached out and gently stroked my hair. I could hear his fingers brushing against my ear so clearly.

“You’ll have to make it up to me while we live together. You’re not going to die this time.“

“But the curse is still…“

“You’ll live. You came here for that reason, didn’t you?”

Julian’s voice was full of conviction. His certainty immediately quelled the anxiety that had been gnawing at me. I was amazed.

In this life, I have constantly been plagued by anxiety. Even when I smiled and was busy, the worry was always there. But right now, at this moment, all I could feel was astonishment at how Julian’s presence brought me peace so effortlessly.

I touched Julian’s cheek and whispered,

“You’re a miracle to me.“

“In what way?“

“Because there’s no way someone like me could have such a perfect husband like you…”

I whispered this as I leaned in closer. As I pulled Julian’s mask away and kissed him, the calm heartbeat I had felt earlier began to race again.

I wrapped my arms around Julian’s neck and pulled him down. He resisted momentarily, but then we both fell onto the bed.

Julian looked at me with an expression of discomfort. It wasn’t out of displeasure, though. His face was filled with impatience and a rising heat.

He gritted his teeth and tried to pull away from me. But as if possessed by something, I held him tighter.

“Julian, it’s raining heavily outside. I can’t take a carriage or even ride a horse. I’m so anxious because I can’t do anything…”

Julian tried to look away, but I pressed my lips to his ear and whispered,

“Please, comfort me.”

TL NOTE: A more advanced chapter of this story is already up on the site. Visit dusk blossoms for more advanced chapters and stories.