Chapter 6 – The First Message

Kairan had already noticed Lenoa’s cautious demeanor, as she had refused both an audience and an escort with him the previous day. Having no attendants or vassals around him, his focus was solely on her. If he had no interest, he would have kept his distance. However, since Lenoa was not a man, that was not the case.

During the dinner the previous evening, Kairan had noticed the bloodstain on Lenoa’s seat and assumed it was an external injury. However, after ordering a random maid to bring a royal physician to Lenoa and returning to his bedroom, he realized what the blood was.

‘Was it… her period?’

Kairan was aware of the monthly, painful, and bothersome physiological phenomenon known as menstruation. Though it had always been someone else’s concern, witnessing it firsthand was a first for him. The person in question was none other than Lenoa, the only one he didn’t keep at a distance.

In any case, if anything had happened to Lenoa, he had resolved to use his power to fire either the maid or the royal physician immediately. Fortunately, the maid who discreetly visited him reported that Lenoa was somewhat better and currently resting.

Their handling was settled, but unfortunately, the next day was the reception of the Kingdom of Merzen’s delegation. With the schedule set a month ago and the delegation arriving the night before, the meeting couldn’t be postponed.

‘Why did they have to come when Lady Lenoa is unwell?’

Kairan’s perception of the allied nation, which he had viewed positively, plummeted instantly.

Seated next to Kairan and in the place of honor, Lenoa pushed herself to proceed with the meeting. Her pale complexion and labored breathing were already noticeable. Her pitiful condition was frustrating to the point of madness.

The meeting was merely an exchange of pleasantries between allied nations. He was itching to halt the meeting immediately and quickly call for a royal physician or maid. As the seemingly endless meeting neared its conclusion, a bombshell was dropped by the delegation.

The decree from the King of Merzen subtly suggested a royal marriage proposal, implying his son should be introduced officially to Lenoa. This added filth to the already declining perception of Merzen.

‘How dare they? A royal marriage? Introducing the first prince?’

Kairan wanted to grab the unfortunate delegate by the collar and ask if they had come for a matchmaking session, accusing them of trying to seize power by wooing someone unwell. If not for Lenoa’s touch and words, the alliance might have exploded long ago.

“Kairan… It’s the first time I’ve heard it from her lips.”

Since their first meeting, Lenoa had always called him Grand Duke Blandi. He had longed for her to call him by his name, especially when they were alone.

For the first time during this meeting, she publicly called him by his name and introduced herself as someone who cared about him. Hearing her words quelled the turmoil that had overwhelmed him.

He had considered breaking the alliance but regained his senses and maintained his usual composure. The irritating meeting finally ended, and the unpleasant delegation left.

Watching Lenoa, who looked more exhausted than usual, drove Kairan to the brink of worry.

‘Should I try to talk to her?’

But whether he spoke to her or not, she seemed to avoid him, likely causing more harm than good.

He knew that the best remedy for menstrual discomfort was to avoid stress, eat well, and rest. The symptoms had likely spread, and she was probably receiving care from the maids and royal physician. Even if he pressured them for proper treatment, it wouldn’t alleviate her condition. Furthermore, if Lenoa heard about his harsh words to the maid, she would distance herself even more.

Kairan buried himself in his office, reading and approving documents without a break, but his heart raced with worry for Lenoa, and the text on the documents blurred. Ultimately, he couldn’t even complete half of his usual state affairs and dropped his pen.

He blamed himself for not recognizing Lenoa’s condition sooner. All he could do for her pain was call a royal physician.

‘If I had known, I would have learned more about… menstruation.’

In any case, he had once studied tirelessly to take the throne in her place, leaving no time for such matters.

Even though he hadn’t become king, Kairan supported her with all his might as her closest aide, using the skills he had honed. He couldn’t stand the thought of an unfamiliar foreign boy sitting next to Lenoa. The idea of marrying her off to strengthen alliances and instantly becoming in-laws was intolerable. Above all, he saw through the shallow scheme to take her body and heart.

Kairan tried to suppress his burning emotions by pulling his hair and washing his face with dry hands, but he couldn’t control his feelings. Eventually, he opened his desk drawer and took out a glass ornament.

He often secretly had servants place such ornaments in his office and bedroom. He disliked them as mere decorations, using them only as tools to break easily.

Kairan took a deep breath and threw the ornament to the floor. Crash. The sound of it shattering into pieces was deafening. Unconcerned, he took out and threw another ornament.

Since childhood, Kairan had a habit of throwing things around when overwhelmed by emotions. The court officials on the fourth floor knew this habit but kept it a secret through bribes or threats.

‘She mustn’t know.’

His hope that Lenoa would never find out was unwavering, even amidst his turmoil.

As the glass shards covered the floor, he paused to catch his breath. Knock, knock. The knock sounded unusually foreign today.

“Your Grace, it’s Betier Meriel.”

Lenoa’s personal maid and head maid. Kairan knew of Betier’s position. He couldn’t possibly let the head maid into the office. She would surely be shocked at the mess, and despite any attempt to keep it quiet, Lenoa would find out.

“What is it?”

That was all Kairan could say to Betier.

“Her Majesty has sent a message. She wishes to see you soon.”

‘A message…? From her to me?’

Kairan had sent countless messages to Lenoa, but it was the first time she had sent one to him. Receiving Lenoa’s message for the first time, Kairan felt his heart tingle instead of racing.

He managed to convey a single word of acknowledgment and, after hearing no more footsteps from the maid, stepped out of his office and looked around the corridor. The lack of an attendant to call upon in times like these was problematic. He spotted an unknown servant cleaning the corridor.

“Hey, you there.”

Startled, the servant’s pupils widened, and he quickly scampered over like a squirrel.

“Clean this place immediately.”

Kairan placed a finger to his lips, silently ordering the servant. And this task, he insisted, must remain a secret.

Leaving the servant hastily cleaning the shattered ornaments behind, Kairan hurriedly found a mirror. Fortunately, the mirror was intact. He tidied his disheveled hair and wiped the sweat from his face. This was her first message, and he wanted to look his best.

After about ten minutes, the office seemed somewhat tidied.

“That’s enough. You may go now.”

The servant hurried out. Although not fully cleaned, he needed time to appear as if he had been waiting leisurely.

“Hmm?”

Kairan glanced down and noticed glass shards left behind by the servant under the desk on the carpeted floor. Alarmed, he hastily bent down and touched the sharp fragments. Even a slight contact near his wrist caused blood to flow. The pain from the hairline cut seeped throughout his body, but it was nothing.

However, he couldn’t let her see this. Kairan stuck his head out into the corridor and called the servant back.

“Br-bring a bandage.”

The servant, startled once again, hurried off. He moved even faster than when cleaning earlier.

Kairan didn’t want Lenoa to see him injured or in pain, especially if it was due to his mental issues.

The servant returned quickly with a first aid kit and cleaning tools. Upon witnessing Kairan’s bleeding wrist, the servant was nearly in shock.

“Your Grace, are you hurt? Should I call a royal physician…?”

“No, no need. I’ll do it.”

He disliked others touching him, except for Lenoa.

The servant offered to finish cleaning, but Kairan declined and sent him away. Not having learned first aid in royal studies, he had no idea how to treat the wound.

‘Perhaps I should have asked that fellow for help.’

All he could do was wrap a bandage around the wound. At least the pain that spread like hairline cracks throughout his body seemed to subside somewhat.

Amidst the chaos, he hadn’t noticed Lenoa’s arrival.

“Um… Grand Duke?”

Hearing Lenoa’s voice, which he considered quite beautiful, brought him back to his senses. He quickly rolled down his sleeve and turned around.

Lenoa stood there in a simpler dress than usual, her long hair flowing. Her hairstyle, which he liked the most, gradually calmed his mind.

Queen Lenoa’s request to Secretary Kairan was to visit her nanny’s estate for two days. In other words, she was asking for leave.

However, there was much work for both of them to do. With more tasks for him, who was taking on the state affairs she wasn’t familiar with, it was clear that her absence for two days would cause disruptions.

But if he scheduled it for one day and increased the workload, it was somehow manageable. Moreover, Lenoa had been struggling with her recent coronation and menstrual issues, so he had to let her go out of humanity.

‘Leaving me behind? No way.’

However, Kairan saw through her hidden intention to be away from him, even for a day. Although guards would accompany her, her true intention was to go alone.

Kairan had many frustrating moments while staying in the palace, but knowing Lenoa was also there brought him peace. Without her, he might truly go mad this time.

But it wasn’t just because of his mental issues. Kairan didn’t want to be apart from Lenoa, not even for a single day. Wherever she went, he wanted to go with her, and no matter how much she avoided him, he was determined to approach her and eventually reach her.

As Lenoa regretfully disappeared from sight, Kairan, instead of resuming document approvals, found himself lost in thoughts about going out with her in a few days. He knew about Lenoa’s nanny. He also knew about her nanny’s husband, Viscount Elwen, the former commander of the knights. Although he had never met them, he felt a pang of bitterness hearing about their close family-like relationship with Lenoa.

“Don’t forget to make her call me by my name.’

Muttering the promise with Lenoa, Kairan felt excited for the first time in a while.