Chapter 17

That was why.  

Freddy impulsively rejected Faivel’s proposal with a clumsy excuse. It was clear that no one present would believe the excuse that Olivia wasn’t in good health. He knew it was an utterly foolish action, but for some reason, his mouth kept moving.  

Thankfully, Basili and Andrew stepped in and resolved the situation smoothly. Otherwise, the consequences might have fallen on Olivia.  

Freddy let out a short sigh and pressed his eyes shut.  

Somehow, the last words of the letter kept floating in his head.  

「My answer to your question is this.  

Yes, I would have smiled as if I were the happiest person in the world.」  

“She didn’t smile at all, though. She just widened her eyes in surprise.”  

Freddy recalled Olivia’s wide, blinking eyes.  

“What? What did you say, Sir?”  

Simon, who was sitting in the passenger seat, asked back after hearing Freddy mutter. But Freddy didn’t respond to his question.  

He had planned to review documents and finish the tasks he had scheduled for the day on the way back to the Grand Duke’s residence.  

However, as he spent more time looking at Olivia, Freddy ended up spending the entire journey watching her breathe evenly on his shoulder.  

Though being tied to her disrupted his plans, he didn’t feel bad about it.  

***

Olivia was walking alone in a pitch-black darkness.  

No matter how much she looked around, there was nothing to see. Something sticky beneath her feet was pulling her down. Instinctively, she knew this wasn’t reality.  

Even so, the unpleasant feeling lingered, and she struggled to escape from that place.  

She had no idea where she was heading.  

Then, she stumbled over something and fell. A squelching sound echoed in her ears.  

Something sticky touched her hand, and at that moment, a faint light flickered.  

She lifted her head toward the light. She could tell it was the only way out of this suffocating darkness.  

Olivia placed her hands on the ground to push herself up. It was then that she finally saw what the strange object was.  

What her hand touched was none other than herself.  

Her own body, with her head pierced and her eyes wide open in death.  

***

“Madame?”  

Olivia jolted awake as if having a seizure.  

Looking around, she saw that the carriage had stopped, and the sky was dark. Her head throbbed, and the unpleasant dream lingered faintly in her mind.  

Cold sweat dripped down her face.  

At that moment, Freddy’s warm hand touched her forehead.  

“You must have been very tired.” 

His calm voice helped her erratic heartbeat return to normal. Olivia took several deep breaths. Then, she rubbed her face against the hand resting on her forehead.  

Freddy, watching Olivia’s body tremble intermittently, asked in a low voice.  

“Are you all right?”  

“Freddy.”  

“Yes.”  

“Please stay like this for a moment.”  

Olivia waited for the faint remnants of the nightmare to disappear. Freddy silently offered her his shoulder and hand.  

Much time had passed. Olivia finally realized what she had done.  

She quickly pulled away from him.  

That morning, she had resolved to keep a proper distance from Freddy, giving him time to adjust to her presence. Yet here she was, acting so childishly—both at the palace and now.  

“I’m sorry! You must have felt burdened. I’ll be more careful from now on.”  

She shut her eyes tightly and apologized.  

When no response came, Olivia bit her lip. Perhaps because she hadn’t fully shaken off the nightmare, her headache hadn’t subsided.  

The lack of a reply made Olivia feel a lump in her throat.  

Falling into an unfamiliar world, believing she was replacing “Liv,” having blurry memories of her death—all of it weighed on her. And now, she was even having strange dreams.  

On top of that, her head felt like it was splitting apart.  

Her mood sank so low that no matter what Freddy said, she felt she would take it badly. She knew it was entirely her problem and not his fault, but she still wanted an apology from him.  

She hadn’t realized how impulsive, selfish, and childish she could be. Olivia felt ashamed of herself and berated herself silently.  

Yet, even amidst these conflicting emotions, she didn’t want to be apart from Freddy. She wished he would simply accept her flawed self.  

Timidly, Olivia reached out and grabbed the sleeve of Freddy’s coat.  

The suffocating silence in the carriage was filled only with the faint sound of their breathing.  

Then, Freddy’s face suddenly leaned close to Olivia’s.  

It wasn’t the hand she was holding, but his other hand that he brought to her forehead.  

Freddy placed his palm on her forehead and rested his own forehead against hers.  

“You don’t seem to have a fever, but are you feeling very unwell?” 

He murmured.  

At the sudden closeness, Olivia opened and closed her mouth in surprise.  

Freddy was staring at her with a serious expression.  

The nightmare that had clouded her mind disappeared, and even her headache faded.  

“I’ll call for the physician.”

When Olivia didn’t respond, Freddy began to pull away from her. But she quickly grabbed his hand and placed it back on her forehead.  

“It feels like I’m getting better when you’re like this.”  

She thought he might frown at her strange words, but Freddy simply watched her actions silently.  

Certain that he wouldn’t stop her, Olivia smiled bashfully and enjoyed his touch.  

Even when Simon came to find Freddy, his hand remained on Olivia’s forehead.  

In that brief moment, Olivia fell asleep again.  

Freddy carefully held her in his arms.  

When Simon opened the door, Freddy stepped out of the carriage, moving quietly to avoid making noise.  

The servants waiting for the Grand Duke and Duchess stood by the entrance.  

Ignoring them, Freddy walked straight to the couple’s bedroom.  

He gently laid Olivia on the neatly arranged bed.  

Her golden hair spread out across the bed. Moonlight streaming through the window danced on her hair.  

Reaching out, Freddy brushed away strands of hair stuck to her face.  

When his warmth touched her, Olivia smiled again.  

“She smiles so easily.” 

His hand, which had been brushing near her lips, froze.  

He recalled the frightened expression she had when she woke up earlier.  

When he had woken her, she had looked as though she might cry at any moment, letting out soft whimpers as if she were having a nightmare.  

“What kind of dream could it have been to scare her like that?”  

Would she be that frightened again if she had another nightmare?  

Freddy imagined Olivia sitting alone in this vast room, feeling desolate. The thought left him unsettled.  

He felt certain that if he stayed by her side, she wouldn’t have to spend the night in fear.  

Though he still had unfinished work and hadn’t accomplished any of his plans for the day,  

“Having days like this…”  

Didn’t seem so bad.  

It was a contradiction, wanting to keep his distance from Olivia while also staying by her side.  

Freddy chose to ignore his conflicting emotions.  

He loosened the tie around his neck and began reviewing documents in the bedroom instead of the study.  

By the time dawn broke, Freddy had only managed to review a single page.  

***

Three days had passed since their visit to the palace. It had also been three days since Freddy began appearing in Olivia’s mornings.  

For reasons unknown, the man who had always avoided her was now sharing the bedroom with her.  

“Good morning.”

Freddy greeted, sitting neatly in the chair beside the bed.  

It was still a sight Olivia wasn’t used to.  

“Good morning, Freddy.”  

“Let’s have a simple breakfast and then depart.”  

Freddy checked the watch on his wrist.  

Only then did Olivia remember that they were supposed to visit somewhere together today.  

Because there were limited ways to learn about theology, Olivia had decided to visit the church.  

She also hoped to consult someone about her unclear memories.  

Though there was a physician residing at the Grand Duke’s residence, Olivia feared that asking him might lead to the information reaching Freddy’s ears.  

So, she sought external help by planning a trip to the church.  

Initially, she intended to go alone. But for some reason, Freddy adjusted his schedule and decided to accompany her.  

“If you plan to attend a service, we should move quickly.”  

“Understood.”  

Freddy rose from his seat, holding documents in his hand as he walked toward the door.  

Just before opening it, he turned back to Olivia and said,  

“After touring the church, let’s explore the capital of Silvest. I promised, didn’t I?”  

Olivia stared at him blankly.  

Though his back was turned, and she couldn’t see his expression, one thing was certain.  

The tips of his ears were red.