5.2

Larisa bit her lip, then lifted her head sharply to look at her father. A chilling smile spread across her face.  

“So, you’re saying you’re going to sell me to some old pervert for a bit of money.”  

“Where do you get off speaking like that…?”  

Larisa cut off the Marquis mid-sentence.  

“I won’t do it.”  

“Larisa!”  

“Exactly! How does it make any sense to marry her off to such an old man? She’ll die if she goes there!”  

“And what about the man you’re so adamant about pushing forward? Is he any better?”  

Larisa’s gaze shifted to the Marchioness. With a smug expression, the Marchioness nodded and said,  

“Of course, he’s better.”  

“A foreigner with no money, no notable family background, and nothing to his name but a handsome face?”  

The Marquis ground his teeth and shouted,  

“Don’t think I don’t know you’ve taken a liking to that wretched man!”  

“What nonsense are you talking about? Do you think I’m as shameless as you are?”  

“Do you think I haven’t heard about you running around with that scoundrel? Ha! Imagine trying to marry off your daughter to your lover—have you completely lost your mind?”  

“What did you just say?”  

Larisa’s head throbbed. The man the Marchioness had in mind for her marriage, while the truth of the matter was unclear, was clearly someone the Marquis knew about. This meant he was someone the Marchioness treasured deeply.  

But Larisa didn’t want the man her mother favored either. The Marchioness had been deceived by handsome faces and conned multiple times before. There was no guarantee that the man she was now suggesting as a marriage prospect wasn’t of the same ilk.  

Larisa watched the couple as they raised their voices, arguing fiercely. She couldn’t help but blurt out,  

“Are you two… really my parents?”

At her words, both the Marquis and the Marchioness turned to look at Larisa. Pale and trembling, Larisa spoke as if screaming.  

“If the two of you truly cared about me, would you even consider presenting such people as my potential spouses? What about my happiness? My desires? Have you ever thought about those? Father, you’re suggesting an old man surrounded by scandal, and Mother, you’re pushing a foreigner who seems like a con artist—have you never once felt sorry for me?”  

“What nonsense are you spouting!”  

“Are you putting your father and me on the same level? How could you do this?”  

Larisa suddenly stood up. She could no longer bear to continue this conversation with them. No, she couldn’t even find a reason to try.  

“I won’t marry anyone.”  

“Are you defying me?”  

“If you want me to follow your wishes, at least bring someone who matches my dignity.”  

“What are you saying now?”  

“The same goes for you, Mother. Instead of someone whose background is unclear, find someone respectable and well-regarded in this social circle.”  

The Marquis and the Marchioness yelled angrily, but Larisa covered her ears and stormed out of the Marquis’s study. The maids and the butler, who had been waiting outside, looked at her with pity. Even their gazes felt humiliating, and Larisa wanted nothing more than to disappear.  

She didn’t even remember how she managed to return to the townhouse. Once inside, she locked the door to her room, preventing anyone from entering. She tore off the ornaments in her hair and threw them onto the floor. Then, she hastily removed the suffocating dress and flung it aside before crawling into bed and pulling the blanket over herself.  

This can’t be real. It just can’t be. 

She couldn’t believe it.  

She felt pathetic for all the effort she had put into becoming someone desirable in high society. Any of the men she had casually passed by could have been a better match than the ones her parents had presented today.  

She hadn’t spent her time casually meeting and parting with men just to end up with such a conclusion.  

She hadn’t coldly rejected Pavel just to end up like this…  

“Ugh…”  

A sob escaped through her clenched teeth. The injustice of it all was driving her mad. 

Why did I  have to be treated like this?  

Perhaps it was her own fault. From the beginning, she had tried to find the love her parents never gave her by surrounding herself with different people, only to let them go. It was her fault for pushing Pavel away out of fear, even though he had genuinely cared for her.  

No, maybe she should have just been stronger from the start. Instead of seeking satisfaction in someone else’s affection, she should have become a strong person herself. But now, it was all too late to change.  

Then, suddenly, a thought struck her.  

She sat up abruptly. There was still a way to escape this dreadful situation. Of course, even she knew that this method was despicable and cowardly. She didn’t even know if it would work. But it was her only option.  

Larisa was fully aware that she was about to rely on someone else’s help to crawl out of this miserable pit. But this was the only solution she knew.  

***

Would it be enough to grab hold of someone and cause a scandal? 

Larisa’s thoughts spiraled further into extremes. The Marquis of Lochrain had declared that the wedding would take place in the spring, once the new year began. 

Just a few months—was there any way to avoid this absurd marriage within that time? 

She adorned herself and attended even more gatherings.  

However, no matter how many men she observed, none seemed to stir her interest. One man had an abrasive personality, another treated those beneath him harshly, and yet another was simply unappealing in appearance. She couldn’t bring herself to extend her hand to any of them.  

In the meantime, it seemed the elderly Earl of Membrane had subtly spread rumors. Wherever she went, Larisa heard whispers behind her back.  

“They say he cherishes his daughter so much, but it seems he’s just using her for his own gain.”  

“How could they deceive everyone so well?”  

“Well, the Marquis of Lochrain is infamous for his love of money…”  

“It seems he loves money more than his own daughter.”  

Each time people’s gazes swept over her from head to toe, Larisa was overwhelmed with a sense of humiliation. The fact that the truth she had tried so hard to hide—that her parents didn’t love her—was now exposed was unbearable. Moreover, the growing certainty of her impending marriage to the Earl of Membrane was driving her mad.  

Yet, she couldn’t sit idly by and step into that dreadful life.  

Then, news came of a grand ball to celebrate the end of the year, to be held at the royal palace.  

This event was an exceptionally long affair, lasting a week and three days. Every noble from across the kingdom was required to attend, and refusal was not an option.  

Larisa instinctively knew this was her last chance.  

‘I must find someone at this ball to marry instead of the Earl of Membrane.’  

The thought briefly crossed her mind that Pavel might also attend this ball, but she quickly erased his face from her thoughts. There was no way he would accept her now, and she didn’t have the courage to face him.  

Besides, how much must he be mocking her? After rejecting him so coldly, she was now on the verge of marrying someone like the Earl of Membrane. 

“Bring me a brighter dress.”  

Larisa adorned herself more beautifully than ever before. She made herself so captivating that no one could take their eyes off her, so enchanting that anyone would fall for her at first sight. As they called her the “Black Lily of Lochrain,” she ensured she would draw everyone’s attention.  

Today, she decided to attend separately from her parents. Her father insisted they go to the royal palace together, but Larisa adamantly refused.  

On the way to the palace, her heart pounded wildly. She wanted to bite her lips, but she couldn’t risk smudging her makeup, so she refrained. Instead, she wrinkled her dress repeatedly in her nervous grip.  

“Welcome, Lady Lochrain.”  

“Thank you.”  

Larisa gracefully smiled at the attendant who opened the carriage door for her and stepped down lightly. As she walked toward the ballroom, she felt like a swan frantically paddling to stay afloat on a pitch-black lake. If she stopped struggling for even a moment, she would be dragged into a horrifying future—a pitiful life she couldn’t escape.  

As the grandest event of the year, everyone had dressed to impress. Yet, even among them, Larisa stood out like a shining star. As she walked in, her silver dress swaying in time with her steps, everyone—young and old, men and women alike—turned to look at her.  

“Ha ha…”  

“As expected of the Black Lily, isn’t she?”  

“She’s far too stunning to be given to that old man as his wife.”  

Feeling the lingering gazes of the men scanning her, Larisa straightened her back even more. 

Someone—anyone—just fall for me. Please.  

As she walked further inside, two people immediately caught her attention.  

There stood Pavel, dressed in a deep navy uniform. In front of him was Princess Alicia, wearing a stunning wine-colored dress. Larisa couldn’t help but bite her lip.  

Why? Why do they look so perfect together?  

The way Pavel looked at Princess Alicia wasn’t exactly tender, but it wasn’t cold either. Likewise, Princess Alicia spoke to Pavel with a calm expression. Pavel nodded or responded to her words, appearing natural in his demeanor.  

Larisa felt as though something inside her had crumbled to pieces.  

Was this how it was all going to end?  

Her steps slowed, and eventually, she came to a complete stop. Standing in the middle of the ballroom, Larisa’s eyes refused to leave the two of them.  

It was Princess Alicia who noticed her gaze first. The princess glanced at Larisa briefly before saying something to Pavel. At her words, Pavel turned his gaze directly toward Larisa.  

The moment his eyes met hers, Larisa felt as though her breath had stopped.  

‘Pavel…’  

She wanted to turn around and run away. She didn’t want him to see her in this pitiful and wretched state. But her feet refused to move.  

No, the truth was, she wanted to see him. That’s why she couldn’t take her eyes off him.  

‘This isn’t right, Larisa. Please…’  

If she could, she would have slapped herself to force her gaze away. Gritting her teeth, she tried to take a step, but Pavel moved first.  

For some reason, he strode directly toward her. Larisa was so startled that her mind went blank. She couldn’t fathom why Pavel was coming to her.