First time

Radel forcibly embraced Kim In-woo.

It was an easy thing to do. Though In-woo cried, he didn’t resist. In-woo simply resigned himself quickly. He looked at Radel with vacant eyes before closing them. Embraced, embraced, and embraced again. Spread his legs and r*ped him. In-woo accepted it all. Or rather, didn’t accept any of it. He simply didn’t resist what was happening.

And soon, In-woo stopped responding to anything.

<Again.>

***

Second time

Radel disappeared from In-woo’s sight. And placed a suggestion. For In-woo to cleanly forget all memories.

In-woo, having forgotten everything, constantly questioned his blank spaces. At the same time, he felt a loneliness as if he alone remained in the world.

Humans cannot live alone. The same was true for In-woo. Craving the warmth of others, In-woo quickly came to like someone new. So,

<No. Again.>

***

Third time

Radel appeared before In-woo having erased his own memories. As Lee Sun-ho, a kind citizen who remembered nothing bad. It was the same way he had told In-woo before.

In-woo yelled at Lee Sun-ho. He constantly got angry, telling him not to do such useless things. He got irritated, and cried too.

In-woo acted as if he would never accept Lee Sun-ho. But at the same time, he couldn’t completely drive him away. Sometimes he would tell him to get lost because he couldn’t stand hating him so much, but when Lee Sun-ho actually wasn’t visible, he would have anxiety attacks.

Though precarious and unstable, In-woo lived together with Lee Sun-ho for a while. It was time that could never be called peaceful or happy.

Then one day, unable to endure anymore, In-woo strangled Lee Sun-ho. However, in the end unable to kill him, he hanged himself instead.

<Again.>

***

Sixth time

Radel threatened Kim In-woo.

Over the past 5 years, many people besides Radel had gotten close to In-woo. Radel kidnapped one of the close actors and tried to kill them in front of In-woo. It was someone who had been irritating him by pretending to be close to In-woo.

In front of the resistant In-woo, he slit the human’s throat. Blood shot up like a fountain from the human’s neck. Seo Jae-hyun would be next. He warned that In-woo’s mother would be after that.

Faced with the succession of lives presented, In-woo had no choice but to accept Radel’s proposal.

Radel came to live with In-woo again as Lee Sun-ho.

The two were clearly lovers. Even though it was a relationship formed through threats, their daily life continued as before. Because that’s what Lee Sun-ho demanded.

The same life as before continued. Having accepted his role, In-woo continued acting. In-woo was an excellent actor who had recently received the Grand Prize. In-woo’s acting was perfect.

Though he couldn’t fool himself alone.

One day, when returning home, In-woo had slit his wrists. The blood that had escaped from In-woo’s pure white body was completely red. Though he put him in a treatment capsule and restored In-woo to his original state, he had become unresponsive to anything.

<Again.>

***

Eleventh time

“What’s so great about Lee Sun-ho that you like him that much?”

“He saved me, liked me, and I liked him.”

“Then why don’t you like me?”

“I do like you.”

“No you don’t.”

“You are Lee Sun-ho.”

“If you know that, why do you push me away?”

“You read others’ minds but don’t know even that?”

“Even reading, I don’t understand.”

“Because I can’t forgive you.”

“What do I need to do for you to forgive me?”

“I don’t know.”

<Again.>

***

Thirty-first time

Radel cherished In-woo who was trapped in a cage from the beginning. He did everything he could while raising In-woo as a pet human.

In-woo, who had been captured without knowing anything, was extremely wary of Radel. But the cage was a very dangerous place, and the only time In-woo was safe was when his giant master visited.

Confined in a narrow space, In-woo quickly came to depend on Radel.

Unlike his previous cage life, many things were given to In-woo. The cage size was also increased. He used an entire artificial planet in space for In-woo. He filled it with other humans like Lampresh’s training facility. He completely brainwashed specially selected humans so they couldn’t threaten In-woo.

In the comfortable planet where danger had been completely removed, In-woo enjoyed a much more comfortable life than when he lived on Earth. That’s how In-woo quickly adapted to the situation.

However, after about 3 years, In-woo began showing signs of abnormality little by little. He got angry at humans who only showed kind responses to him, and even hit them. The brainwashed humans smiled at In-woo who was assaulting them. In-woo’s condition worsened moment by moment. He would spin around in the same spot before banging his head against the wall, or lie down anywhere and do nothing.

<Again.>

***

Sixty-second time

Radel was a capable businessman.

He came to Korea on a business trip from abroad and persistently courted Kim In-woo whom he fell for at first sight by chance. At first, In-woo kept his distance, thinking the overly handsome foreign businessman was strange. However, as he consistently showed up and courted him kindly, he gradually lowered his guard.

A few months later, In-woo accepted Radel’s courtship. That’s how they became lovers.

In-woo was faithful to Radel who had become his lover. He contacted him when work was done, and enjoyed dates whenever they had free time. He was a devoted lover.

But at the same time, In-woo was an actor who loved his work too much. For his future, In-woo constantly accepted the endless flow of work. Vacations and dates with Radel were always second priority. Work was always the priority for In-woo.

“Am I not as precious as life itself?”

“What are you saying?”

“I guess you don’t love me as much when the circumstances don’t support it. Well, the circumstances were quite dramatic then. When I was Lee Sun-ho.”

“What on earth are you talking about?”

“I’m thinking of trying completely random situations.”

“Please speak so I can understand.”

<See you later, In-woo.>

***

“Please stop this now!”

Raseti snatched In-woo from Radel’s arms and held him. In In-woo’s arms, Kim In-woo was pale as if he would draw his last breath right now.

The numerous simulations taking place in Kim In-woo’s brain. Unable to withstand that overload, blood began flowing from In-woo’s nose.

Radel’s gaze, which had been rummaging through countless dreams, gradually returned to normal. In Radel’s eyes glaring at Raseti, there wasn’t a speck of affection for someone who had been together for hundreds of years.

It was an act that meant death even for Raseti. Because to Radel, others’ lives were merely consumables.

“He’s going to die at this rate.”

“He won’t die. How many times do you think I’ve done this?”

“……”

“Put Kim In-woo down.”

For a thousand years, all Radel had done was rummage through others’ minds to extract information or kill them. There was no way he would make a mistake now and kill In-woo. In-woo still had strength left too.

Despite Radel’s warning, Raseti couldn’t let go of In-woo.

Though Radel said he wouldn’t cause problems, he already had a record of attacking In-woo. Though unconsciously, Radel’s ability had indiscriminately reached out and stabbed into In-woo, and In-woo had collapsed from the shock and couldn’t properly remember what happened then.

“Nothing can be changed with your way, Radel-nim!”

Though their fingertips trembled finely, Raseti desperately protested. Actually, in Raseti’s view, the solution was very simple.

They could erase his memories as In-woo had said before collapsing and start over. Of course, that would still mean deceiving In-woo, but what could they do when he himself wanted it? Besides, Radel could make sure In-woo wouldn’t even know he was being deceived until he died.

They couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t use the easy method and was trying to go about it the hard way. Even while giving honest advice, Raseti thought these words would probably become their last will.

But the expected end didn’t come. They had clearly thought the angry Radel would turn their mind inside out and make them commit suicide.

When they slightly opened their eyes, Radel was looking at In-woo with an expressionless face. Though his expressions had become easier to read in the recent 5 years, it was now a face whose thoughts couldn’t be read, as if he had returned to before.

“I already know that I’m a being that harms Kim In-woo.”

“……”

“Let’s go back, Raseti.”

At the sudden words, Raseti’s eyes went round. As it was a completely unexpected gain, they couldn’t process Radel’s words at once.

“G-go back? Where?”

“First we need to resolve Ezel’s matter. There’s a lot of work we left pending.”

“All of a sudden?”

“Yes.”

Speaking nonchalantly, Radel took In-woo from Raseti’s arms. Even in the gesture of dusting In-woo’s collar as if Raseti’s touch had been unpleasant, no agitation could be found.

“Radel-nim.”

“Return to the ship first.”

Raseti hesitated before turning around. Ezel, who had been quietly watching the mess, also disappeared with a sour face, and Radel reached out toward In-woo lying on the floor.

In-woo’s blood stained Radel’s pure white fingertips. Though he had no thoughts of backing down, he knew well that this way would only lead to destruction. He came to know it even though he didn’t want to. Most of the results he had seen over a hundred times were destruction after all.

But he had no intention of giving up. He would absolutely never give up. Withdrawing now was just laying groundwork for the future. Radel slowly withdrew his hand.

***

Kim In-woo opened his eyes on the bed.

As if no tragedy had occurred, gentle sunlight softly covered In-woo. Though it felt like he had dreamed countless dreams, he couldn’t remember any of them clearly.

But what was certain was that they were all dreams with Radel.

Some were horrible, some were happy. And everything was foolish. He hated himself who had met foolish endings in most of the numerous dreams.

Rising from his spot, In-woo looked around the entire house. One person’s traces had been perfectly carved out. As if he had lived alone from the beginning.

If it was going to be like this, it would have been better to live forever in the dream, never opening his eyes.

In-woo clutched his head and collapsed.

“You f*cking bastard, you left without erasing the most important thing……”

No answer came back.