July 25

I made a meal for In-woo after a long time. To make up for not being able to cook for him for a year, I made it specially with ingredients imported from space. Since it’s made with particularly precious ingredients, it should help restore In-woo’s health too.

Though In-woo didn’t specifically compliment that it was delicious, he finished everything that was served. Seeing him eat well made me very proud and happy. It’s so nice to see him after a long time. He’s pretty. He’s lovely.

After the meal, In-woo locked himself in his room and didn’t come out. Since he asked me not to look, I refrained from using my ability to peek inside. As I can’t see into the room without focusing, I hope he can feel at ease and forget I’m even here. If it makes him uncomfortable, I’ll make sure not to look, no matter what.

I like Kim In-woo so much. I want to be with him. I don’t want to hurt him. I won’t read Kim In-woo’s mind either. Because he doesn’t want it.

That’s all I want right now. I’m not asking for much right now.

Of course, thinking long-term, I do have the desire to restore our previous relationship…

***

July 26

Just like yesterday, In-woo came to wake me up again this morning. There’s something so comforting about starting the day by seeing his face. For the past year, it had only been a hologram of In-woo waking me up. While the hologram, designed to mimic only his appearance, offered a fleeting sense of comfort when I first opened my eyes, it was never the same. Knowing it wasn’t the real Kim In-woo, I couldn’t bring myself to feel anything more.

For the past year, I stayed very well-behaved thinking of In-woo.

This morning, I had breakfast with In-woo again, just like yesterday. He seemed a little down, and honestly, it was endearing how he’d snap at me sharply, only to feel guilty about it right after. I wish he wouldn’t feel bad, no matter what he says to me—I’m more than ready to take even harsher words.

After the meal, In-woo went out to exercise. I wanted to join him, but he didn’t allow it. I considered monitoring him but held back. Still, I couldn’t help attaching guard androids for his safety. I had no choice—just the thought of the moment he tried to end it all still drives me to the edge.

As long as you’re healthy, In-woo, I don’t need anything else. You don’t even have to look my way.

***

I still can’t help but worry—will this approach really work? What if he ends up gone the moment I take my eyes off him? Would it be safer to implant suggestions to prevent him from dying and lock him away now? All I want is for him to stop thinking about death, so I can continue being gentle with Kim In-woo.

I know I’d regret it if I acted on my impulses. What I truly want is to fully win Kim In-woo’s heart. I’ve already held back for an entire year. With him by my side now, I should be able to summon even more patience than before.

***

July 27

Today, I got to share not just breakfast but dinner with In-woo as well. Normally, he just grabs something from the fridge, but tonight he actually let me cook. It made me incredibly happy.

I also had a chance to talk with In-woo today. As he spoke to me casually, I made an effort to highlight my good qualities, though it didn’t seem like he was taking me too seriously.

For the past five years, I’ve worked hard to become the perfect partner for In-woo. I admit there were flaws in the person I used to be, but beyond that, there’s no deception. I genuinely want to be a devoted and caring lover for him.

There are also practical benefits if In-woo accepts me as his partner. I can personally help prevent smaller disasters from affecting Earth—things like epidemics and climate change are solvable with our technology. In fact, I’ve already intervened in several situations.

It’s true my past might seem questionable, but I have no reason to harm this frontier planet, especially with Kim In-woo here. From Earth’s perspective, my presence won’t bring any harm. I hope he can let go of the guilt he feels for allowing a “strange alien” to stay here.

And just so he knows, this isn’t something I’ve just picked up from his thoughts recently—it’s something I read from him a year ago.

***

July 30

Today, I told In-woo upfront that I had personal business to take care of outside. He gave me a suspicious look before deciding to come along with me.

My destination was In-woo’s agency. Though he seemed to think I changed my plans because he came along, I was simply heading where I originally intended. I knew he’d be suspicious and follow if I went out alone—it wasn’t hard to predict.

Of course, my understanding of In-woo’s behavior wasn’t from reading his mind but from knowing his habits. His patterns are easy to figure out. After all, we’ve been lovers for six years now. (And yes, the timeline is accurate—we never actually broke up during that period.)

Anyway, thanks to In-woo suspiciously doubting me, I went in while getting scolded… There was a minor issue of In-woo grabbing my collar asking what I did when the CEO and employees naturally recognized me rather than Lee Sun-ho as In-woo’s lover. But as I explained to In-woo, I didn’t manipulate anything except changing <Lee Sun-ho>’s existence to <Radel> in other people’s recognition.

He might not like me touching others’ memories but this was really unavoidable. Since In-woo hates me changing into <Lee Sun-ho>, I can only be <Radel> from now on. If I hadn’t changed others’ recognition, <Lee Sun-ho> would become the past lover and <Radel> would become the second lover, but I don’t want that. I want to monopolize Kim In-woo’s past, present, and future.

I am Kim In-woo’s only lover. Just as I have been until now and plan to continue being Kim In-woo’s only lover in the future, I needed to continue being Kim In-woo’s only lover in other people’s memories too.

…After hearing this explanation, In-woo punched me in the face.

It didn’t really hurt. Honestly it tickled. For someone who exercises, why was he so weak? He’s gotten even weaker than before. In-woo’s small cute fist… What to do being this weak. I have no choice but to keep worrying about Kim In-woo’s wellbeing…

Anyway, going to the agency today was to find new work for In-woo.

Honestly I want to monopolize Kim In-woo. But since In-woo really loves his work. Rather than listlessly wandering around the house every day, it would be better for him to find vitality doing his work. He needs to regain vitality, recover his strength, and restore his health for this frail fist to get a bit stronger too.

Though In-woo got annoyed at me, he couldn’t get angry at the CEO and manager who were worried about him. Honestly that was a bit unpleasant but I endured it. It would be nice if he treated me kindly too. Of course I can wait as long as needed if he wants to be angry. But still…

Anyway, the CEO passed him a good script that came in, saying In-woo’s face looked quite better and he should at least take a look. In-woo couldn’t refuse.

He’s reading it in his room now, but it should be good right?