A pure body with no s*xual experience until now. For someone who had never even m*sturbated, it was too much stimulation.

The liquid that gushed out from below soaked her partner. Hyacinth released her stinging lips and covered her eyes with one arm. In the darkness that came late, she felt the man holding her knee tightly.

Her mind was in turmoil. Words floated around without order. It will hurt, Seina’s warning. A more detailed explanation that someone would enter her.

Nanny.

That wasn’t all, was it?

What if even the detailed explanation wasn’t everything…?

At this moment, she didn’t know if she should resent the nanny who never gave her proper s*x education, cling to her aunt, or hate her husband who took full advantage of her ignorance.

But Hyacinth instinctively realized that her real first night was about to begin. It was an instinctive realization.

She didn’t know why her unfeeling husband suddenly changed his mind. She only sadly acknowledged that this was an opportunity. Though it was miserable to rely on her husband’s whims… what could she do?

Hyacinth steeled herself.

Her chest swelled with an inhale and fell with an exhale.

“Ah…!”

The end finally pierced her skin and began to carve a path. Hard and relentless force. Only Hyacinth, skewered like a harpoon, shuddered in pain.

Below, it burned. It felt like sparks were flying to her head.

Three rough thrusts. The man finally created a perfect path and buried himself to the end. The suffocating, sharp pain left Hyacinth unable to even scream. Only silent moans flowed from her parted lips.

When her body, accustomed to the pain, finally relaxed. When her stiffened legs slightly softened.

“Ugh, huh.”

Ethan, who caught that moment precisely, began to move quickly. The squelching sound was clear each time he entered and exited.

The wet noise made her ears burn. Even as her whole body turned bright red, Hyacinth tried not to show any reaction.

She didn’t know why.

Even though she knew that there was no such thing as dignity in bed, or perhaps realizing that there might not be such a thing, she still wanted to suppress her voice. She didn’t want to allow any meaningful reaction.

This act, it’s nothing.

It’s really nothing… She didn’t want to admit that her self-esteem crumbled just because she couldn’t consummate on the first night. She wouldn’t admit it.

So Hyacinth stubbornly suppressed her voice throughout the rough shaking. Even if she had to glare under her palm to avoid crying. Even if her finger joints turned white from gripping the sheet.

The last hurdle came when Ethan’s member, buried deep inside her, slightly swelled. In fear that her stomach would burst, Hyacinth froze for a moment.

A suppressed groan from above. And then.

Something hot, like liquid, pounded inside. Hyacinth twisted her waist helplessly at the sensation of it flowing inside her. Her insides squeezed and convulsed uncontrollably. She wanted to escape but the man kept rubbing and thrusting until the end.

The tears that had collected on her eyelashes finally fell. Rolling sideways instead of downward, making a hot path. It was sorrowful. Unable to control her emotions, Hyacinth sobbed softly. It was the consummation she wanted, she didn’t regret holding the man, but it was too sorrowful and miserable.

Why on earth did you hold me on a whim?

Will you hold me again in the future? After suddenly holding me like this, why don’t you say a word?

Is this normal?

Thinking such thoughts made her emotions surge. Don’t cry. Hyacinth scolded herself harshly. She had shed enough tears until now.

This kind of thing is nothing……

She would no longer be anxious. Truly.

Just then, very suddenly, warmth touched her hand that was gripping the sheet.

Their hands slowly overlapped. Hyacinth held her breath. The man, as if to soothe her hands tormenting the innocent fabric, gently intertwined his fingers with hers.

Why does that warmth matter?

Why does that action shatter her resolve? In the end, Hyacinth sobbed silently.

Ethan continued to hold her hand.

By the time Hyacinth stopped crying, Ethan carefully slipped away. Then he collapsed right next to her. He looked as if he had completely lost his senses.

Startled, Hyacinth quickly sat up, only to realize her husband had fallen into a deep sleep, almost as if he had fainted. He was in such a heavy sleep that he didn’t wake even when she shook him lightly.

What on earth just happened…?

Feeling uneasy, Hyacinth tilted her head, pondering what she had missed. But she was unlikely to figure it out, given that she didn’t even know much about how intimacy was supposed to work.

Get a grip.

She had to do what needed to be done rather than waste time on useless worries.

Hyacinth stared blankly at the traces between her thighs. Amid the white, sticky liquid, there was a red tinge. Just as she finally understood why Ethan had made himself bleed.

…Well, you fooled me.

And I fell for it completely.

Only a bitter smile escaped her lips at the deception. His heart, her heart, an unbalanced scale, unrequited love, unrequited love, unrequited love.

Words burst out haphazardly. Hyacinth gritted her teeth and stood up. Her insides ached, and her waist hurt; she wanted to just faint like her cruel husband, but she endured.

She had to endure.

Because she didn’t want anyone to know that she had only now properly consummated the marriage. It might be petty pride. But Hyacinth didn’t want to fall into a pitiful situation. She had lived arrogantly all her life.

So she moved her broken body and cleaned up the traces thoroughly. It was fortunate that they had made love with their clothes on. The dirty, sticky traces were on the hem of her bliaut, not on the bed. So.

After tidying up her husband’s clothes, she limped towards the bathroom attached to the bedroom.

Of course, the water had gone cold. Not knowing how to heat it, Hyacinth washed herself with cold water. The northern chill made her breath feel frosty.

Even though she only rinsed her bliaut, it took quite a while. She had to stop frequently due to the pain from moving. It felt like her joints, which had moved vigorously, were creaking.

When Hyacinth finally managed to wash herself and returned with the clean bliaut.

Ethan was no longer on the bed.

Hyacinth didn’t bother looking for him. She was too used to her husband’s sudden absences to worry about his departure.

So she buried her limp body into the bed. Her whole body, escaping the cold, greedily absorbed the regained warmth. Her hands and feet stung. They were numb.

My throat hurts… My head hurts…

Hyacinth sniffled and fell into a sleep that was like fainting.

Because she was bedridden with a severe cold, she neither knew nor dealt with the commotion that occurred afterward.

* * *

Ethan Erentis suddenly opened his eyes.

It felt like he had dreamed something peculiar, but he couldn’t remember. That often happens when you sleep. He was about to dismiss it lightly but then froze.

Until just now, he had been sleeping in a ‘bed.’

A bed? A bed, you say? Whose bed? He looked around in bewilderment and recognized a familiar room structure.

The Duchess’s bedroom.

…What?

Ethan laughed coldly. Then it made even less sense.

There was no way he could have fallen asleep in Hyacinth Hener—no, Hyacinth Erentis’s bed.

As soon as he realized the incongruity, his whole body tensed with tension. A warning rang in his head, but the drowsiness was still strong.

This is ridiculous.

His survival instincts detected danger, but he was so sleepy he could die. Completely insane.

Ethan forced his eyes open and somehow got out of the bedroom. The cold air slapped his cheeks. Even so, his eyelids drooped, so he hastily drew a dagger and cut his forearm. Watching the blood drip down finally started to clear his muddled mind.

Blood. The color of his wife’s hair. Damn.

In this absurd situation, he couldn’t believe he was thinking such thoughts. Ethan gritted his teeth and straightened his clothes. Because he had slept so deeply, his appearance was a mess.

“Did you call for me?”

The butler, who had come running at his call, subtly checked his expression.

Ethan gave an order in raw, unrefined words.

“Someone drugged me. It seems to be a sleeping pill.”

“What?”

“Find out who did it.”

The butler’s face turned pale.

* * *