Chapter 48 – Irreverent Thoughts

“Please come out.”

It was right after that when Eloise, blinking slowly with dazed eyes, froze with a startled, rabbit-like expression.

“The master has returned.”

“……!”

Looking around urgently, she saw the vivid crimson sunset slanting through the window.

Eloise hurriedly wiped the water off with a prepared towel and dashed out of the bathroom in a flurry.

“……Um, where are my clothes?”

The maid, unable to hide her confusion, glanced silently between Eloise, who was dripping water, and the puddle forming at her feet, then led her to the guest room that had been tidied up.

‘When did it get so late? How did I fall asleep…!’

There was no time to admire the beauty of the room, nor even to dry her hair.

Falling asleep in the bathtub and making Ansel Blaine wait in a situation where she should be greeting him upon his return—who exactly was the one receiving help here…?

Ignoring the heat rising in her face, Eloise hurriedly opened the suitcase placed on one side of the room.

The only clothes she had were three dresses for outings, two nightgowns, a Spencer jacket, and a shawl.

Even the dress she wore today needed urgent washing, so it had to be excluded.

“Sigh, what should I wear…”

Her hair, heavy with moisture, fell over her forehead, obstructing her view.

As Eloise stared blankly into her bag, water droplets falling, she seemed to make up her mind, swept her hair back, and picked up the navy blue dress.

What am I worrying about? None of these clothes are anything special anyway. 

Realizing this, she let out a bitter laugh like a sigh.

* * *

In the dining room, where a beautiful silver candlestick emitted a radiant glow, a meal for two was prepared.

One end of the smooth, oval mahogany table was empty, and on the opposite side sat a man holding a half-folded newspaper in one hand and a teacup in the other.

He remained still, his gaze fixed on the paper, as if time had stopped.

His thick black eyelashes cast a shadow, his straight nose fell smoothly, and his neatly positioned lips were so noble they seemed like a delicate sculpture.

Eloise, unconsciously biting her lip as she traced the flickering candle shadows on that beautiful face with her eyes, finally caught his attention when she clasped her slightly sweaty hands near her navel.

Without moving his chin, he silently lifted his eyes.

In the candlelight, his eyes appeared to glint sharply with a golden hue. They were like the eyes of a raptor spotting its prey.

That intensity lasted only a moment, but Eloise froze, forgetting even to breathe.

As if she had become prey for that raptor.

Finally, when Ansel set down the newspaper, leaned back in his chair, and brought the teacup to his lips, Eloise could exhale the breath she had been holding.

Her chest rose and fell slightly with each slow breath. His light green eyes were fixed on her as if nailed there.

After a moment of silence, Eloise spoke. It was her first word, uttered after biting her lips for a long time like crushing rose petals.

“Thank you, Captain.”

“What?”

Ansel’s smooth brow furrowed slightly.

As his eyes, hazy like mist, gradually narrowed, Eloise added a word.

“Thanks to you, I was able to wash and rest comfortably. So I wanted to thank you first. For making you wait—”

“Why do you call me that?”

“…Oh, I’m sorry, Sir Ansel.”

Mumbling in an uncertain voice, as if gauging his reaction, Ansel let out a hollow laugh as if incredulous.

Even in his exasperation, the curve of his lips was beautiful, leaving Eloise momentarily speechless.

“Ansel.”

“……”

“Call me by my name, like before. It’s just you and me now.”

At those words, Eloise’s bright blue eyes widened, but the light within them slowly subsided.

Like the moon waiting for dawn.

“I can’t do that.”

The time when she had been on familiar terms with him was already a distant past.

Back then, Ansel wasn’t the young master of a noble family, nor the promising top student of the kingdom’s most prestigious academy, nor the pride of the Royal Military Academy, nor a captain at the military office.

But now, everything had changed. Literally everything. The only thing that hadn’t changed was that Eloise Bailey was still the second daughter of a commoner family with nothing.

Her face, staring straight at him with her lips pressed together, was quite stubborn.

Even though she appeared fragile without a single hard spot, her eyes always held a steadfast light.

Eloise had no idea that Ansel found this aspect of her endearing.

Ansel skillfully erased the smile from his lips and rubbed his chin.

“Even if I say I want to hear it?”

It might have been her imagination, but his question sounded almost like pleading.

To avoid falling for the enchanting low tone that weakened her knees, Eloise clenched her hands tightly and shook her head instead of answering.

Then a low voice, like a sigh, followed.

“Suit yourself.”

“……”

It seemed he no longer intended to show any courtesy. Of course, that was only natural for him.

He had no obligation to show courtesy to a woman with no status, and the pretense of being her sister’s fiancé, which was nothing short of deception, had ended.

However, Eloise felt an odd itch in her throat at the feeling of having returned to the past.

Of course, she had no intention of revealing such feelings.

“Why don’t you sit down? It’ll get cold.”

At those words, Eloise quickly took her seat. She tried to fix her gaze on the gleaming, pristine silverware, but the deliciously prepared food kept catching her eye.

She had resolved not to show any weakness while staying here, and today she had something she needed to make clear to him.

It was no exaggeration to say that her future life here depended on the conversation that was about to begin, so she needed to appear rational.

But she was so hungry right now.

‘…What should I do?’

After all, the tea and a few biscuits she had in the parlor were all she had eaten today.

If she hadn’t dozed off in the bathtub, she could have had a light snack before Ansel returned… but what was the use of regretting it now?

Eloise tried to ignore the steak covered in rich gravy, but the greasy, savory smell was an irresistible temptation.

‘No. I can’t show a foolish side. At least not today…’

As she struggled to lift her gaze, Eloise met Ansel’s eyes.

He had apparently been watching her intently as she fought not to look longingly at the dishes on the table.

In the moment her mind went blank with shame, Ansel spoke.

“You can eat comfortably. Just like you would at home.”

“……”

“Why are you so tense? This isn’t even my grandfather’s mansion.”

So he noticed I was nervous. 

Realizing that, Eloise wanted to disappear on the spot.

Once, they had spent a bright summer together, and even now they were sitting across from each other like this, but in truth, there was an unbridgeable gap between them.

It was a relationship that had never been equal from the start. Yet Eloise couldn’t help but assert her pride in front of him.

She knew it was ridiculous. It was like a small hedgehog raising its quills in front of a lion.

“Eloise, am I making you uncomfortable?”

“No.”

Eloise lied out of habit. Of course, she wasn’t comfortable, but agreeing immediately would make her seem weak.

“You look like you have a lot to say, but let’s eat first. Do you know how thin you’ve gotten?”

Saying so, Ansel picked up his cutlery.

Perhaps because of the white dress shirt he wore, his pale, noble face appeared even colder.

Watching him for a moment, Eloise reluctantly picked up her utensils at his next words.

“If you want, I can feed you myself. It’s not a difficult task.”

“…I can eat by myself.”

Blushing slightly, Eloise lowered her gaze and began to eat.

She carefully surveyed the plates in front of her and quietly started with the still-warm cream soup.

The fragrant onion flavor seemed to gently soothe her empty stomach.

Ansel watched Eloise like that.

With meticulousness, he pretended to slice the roasted vegetables as if worried she might stop eating at any moment.

‘Did you meet a stray cat in the field?’

Though it was a clumsy guess, Ansel didn’t feel it was entirely wrong.

She had looked just like a lost cat, crouching and crying in a corner of the square.

Her face, which had become gaunt and haggard, especially gave that impression.

Anyway, now that he had brought her to his place and was having dinner with her, Ansel Blaine was, for the first time, grateful for defying his family’s wishes.

He never imagined he would have such a blasphemous thought yesterday, but the joy of finally obtaining what he had desperately wanted was immense enough to shake even his firm beliefs.

At that moment, Eloise, her eyes shining like stars, moved her fork and knife toward the well-cooked beef.

Watching her, Ansel quietly swallowed a smile and sipped from his wine glass.

He didn’t know what she had been through, but Eloise was no longer like a lost cat.

Now she was safe. Under his shadow. In a place where he could see and touch her anytime. So his role was clear.

‘I should care for her with love.’

With that thought, as he smiled with utmost satisfaction, Eloise suddenly looked up.