Cecil walked out of the room in a fleeing manner, and Cyrus followed behind him. How frantically had he walked? They reached the entrance of the forest surrounding the count’s estate.

Cecil ran recklessly down the forest path. The home tutor’s voice kept echoing in his ears. That voice calmly informing them about the harmful effects of inbreeding. The contemptuous look in her eyes suggesting she recalled something terrible, despite maintaining a proper expression.

Suddenly his clothes felt cumbersome. He wanted to take them all off and throw them away. Shoes that protected his feet from injury, clothing that protected him from external rain and wind. Products developed for humans to live as humans. Items made for people, not beasts.

“Ugh…”

Cecil, who had been running, fell to the ground and vomited everything inside. He wanted to throw up everything.

What have I been doing?

The things he had done with Cyrus came to mind one by one.

What on earth have I been doing all this time?

Kissing while hiding from others’ eyes. Touching each other’s g*nitals in places where only the two of them could hide. Pleasing each other with their mouths and receiving pleasure through those same mouths. Human-like acts performed under the excuse of not knowing. They were all beastly sins. Finally, in that forest, Cecil realized all the sins he had committed.

“Brother…!”

He heard Cyrus’s voice following him from behind, unable to grab or touch him.

“Huu, ugh…”

Tears poured out before he could control them. Looking back, he should have detected the strangeness when he instinctively felt the need to hide it. But Cecil had cut himself off from enlightenment because he “didn’t understand well,” and as a result, he had committed incest with his brother.

‘Humans should maintain their dignity as humans.’

The home tutor’s voice wouldn’t leave his mind. It felt like itchy insects were crawling all over his body. He should have maintained his dignity as a human. If he couldn’t protect himself, he should have at least protected his brother. He had abandoned his humanity simply because he “didn’t understand” and had fallen to the level of a beast.

He could see his ten fingers and wrists in his field of vision. Though wearing the shell of a human, what was inside was not human but an ugly monster.

Suddenly a fundamental question arose. He was born as a snake and grew up as a human. Then what am I? He questioned everything he hadn’t questioned before. His father who played kindly with him in the form of a beast. His father who couldn’t transform into a snake. The memory in that room where he was not considered disgusting as a young beast but was nursed and embraced with love.

“Why, why did we do it?”

“Do what?”

“Why did we do such things?”

At that question, Cyrus’s face crumpled. Why did they do it? If asked why they did it, Cyrus’s answer was fixed.

Because he loved him.

He had imprinted on his blood brother from inside the womb and looked for his face as soon as he was born. Falling in love with him was a natural progression. He considered it fate. Fate is like an absolute oracle. Just as mere mortals cannot refuse the message of God, so was Cyrus’s love.

Conditions such as being young or never having experienced love before were not important. What did such things matter? He could distinguish the real from the fake among the fakes. Cecil was the only thing he wanted to possess and simultaneously the only real thing.

The fundamental question of how one could distinguish real love did not exist in the first place. Anyone who imprints on that voice from inside the womb would fall in love. Cyrus’s love was like that.

But…

“What am I?”

Cecil seemed unlike Cyrus.

“They say it’s not something humans do. But we’re not human anyway.”

Cecil looked up at his approaching brother. His face was soaking wet.

“Then what are we, what on earth are we? We’re not people… What are we?”

“…”

Being human yet not human, being beast yet not beast. That was their identity. Unable to belong to humanity even if they wanted to, and unable to live as beasts after having awakened to the dignity of living as humans. They had shared lust with their siblings while carrying such an identity.

In a way, it was a kind of test. An opportunity to preserve their dignity and love by not doing it. But they had forsaken that opportunity by engaging in beast-like behavior.

“…We’re just us.”

“Don’t play with words.”

“Then? What does brother want to be?”

Cyrus’s eyes, which were glaring, were red. Having never seen Cyrus cry before, Cecil felt strange even in the midst of this.

“Is it our fault that we were born this way? We were just born.”

Could there be fault in being born? In other words, could there be beings whose very birth is flawed?

Cecil suddenly thought that he should not have come out of that egg. His crying grew uncontrollable. He wanted to shed his human form and return to his original form. An unprecedented awareness was tormenting him.

“Do you regret it?”

Suddenly Cyrus asked. Do I regret it… Cecil found that question difficult. Cyrus pressed his eyes firmly and took several deep breaths.

“It’s too late to regret it.”

“…”

“You like me too, brother.”

At those words, Cecil stepped backward. This shouldn’t happen. This was wrong. He could see Cyrus staring at him with an unwavering, upright posture. Suddenly, a realization came to him. Cyrus would never stop.

Not until Cecil stopped first.

With his awareness that had already learned shame, this momentum frightened him. This relentless violation was not something Cecil could handle.

“I…”

“…”

“I want to, hic, stop now.”

So Cecil chose cowardice. Just as he had engaged in intimate acts with Cyrus under the excuse of not knowing well, the end was also cowardly. But Cecil believed this was the best option. It was the best choice he could make in the midst of the worst realization. As soon as those words ended, Cyrus’s eyes twisted. The shadows of the forest trees fell over Cyrus’s face, and for a moment, his expression disappeared.

The forest was quiet, seemingly a place where beasts should exist, and no noise from outside could be heard. Only the sound of Cecil sobbing grew louder, and the joints of his fingers pressing against the dirt floor slowly twisted. He wanted to return to being an ugly beast that wasn’t human.

I hate this form.

The sound of bones breaking repeatedly echoed, and his beautiful face, wet with tears, became covered with scales. His legs, which had powerfully pushed against the ground as he ran, had their joints shattered and merged into a single skeleton, and the hands that had gently touched Cyrus atrophied.

Finally, as Cecil, who had returned to being a beast, sniffled, Cyrus embraced the young snake in his arms that hadn’t fully healed. In the corners of his eyes, tears that couldn’t flow formed red.

From somewhere, a swooshing wind blew, brushing past Cyrus’s forehead. Though no one told him, he could realize it.

The growing period was over.

Both his brother and he had reached the end of their growth in this forest. That year, the season in the forest was damp, cool, and desolate.

In the late summer approaching autumn. There, the season of children ended.