Chapter 5.5

“I have a question.”

“…Yes.”

“Other than that sister-obsessed girl, has anyone else been here?”

After hesitating for a moment, Su-eon rolled her eyes and finally spoke.

“Other than my dad… you’re the first one to, Senior.”

Seung-jo froze.

“Senior?”

“…You told me to call you that.”

“I didn’t realize it was such a dangerous word at the time.”

Seung-jo let out a low chuckle, lightly pressing his hand against his forehead.

“It’s a terrifying word.”

After exhaling a languid breath, he gently cupped Su-eon’s cheek and leaned in closer. His warm breath tickled her skin.

“Say it again.”

“No.”

Su-eon rejected him immediately. Saying something like that while staring into his eyes felt unbearably embarrassing. That kind of thing was for twenty-year-olds in the early stages of dating. She wanted to stay calm and composed. After all, she was almost thirty now.

As Su-eon turned away with a prim expression, Seung-jo let out a relaxed laugh, the sound escaping him naturally.

“The rebellious princess has returned.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Which part don’t you like? The rebellious part? Or the princess part?”

“Both.”

“Alright then. I’ll keep calling you that until you like it.”

“Why do you always just say whatever you want…”

Flustered, Su-eon lifted her head, but the soft look in Seung-jo’s eyes left her speechless. She could feel her face heating up, vividly aware of the flush spreading across her cheeks.

Ah, it’s hopeless. 

There’s no way she could stay calm with a man like this right in front of her. The sound of her heart pounding like a storm was so loud it felt like her ears were ringing.

“What’s wrong?”

Seung-jo gently rubbed Su-eon’s cheek, which had frozen like a fossil, and asked her a question. Su-eon stared at him blankly, and before she realized it, her hand reached out toward him. Just as her hand was about to lightly touch him, Seung-jo tilted his face and rested his cheek against her palm. Startled, Su-eon tried to pull her arm back, but Seung-jo’s hand rose to clasp hers.

In a quiet voice, Seung-jo asked, 

“Are you okay?”

Su-eon nodded slowly, then shook her head. To be honest, she was still confused about how things had ended up like this. The pile of unresolved issues remained, yet none of them came to mind.

A faint smile flickered at the corners of Seung-jo’s eyes before he pressed his lips against her palm. Kiss, kiss. His lips moved slowly upward along her wrist, causing the sleeve of her blouse to ride up.

When Seung-jo noticed the bruises forming on her translucent skin, his movements stopped. The warmth and softness in his eyes disappeared in an instant, replaced by a cold fury.

Muttering something about how he might just have to kill someone, Seung-jo’s voice was low and dangerous. Yet Su-eon, still dazed, looked at him with vacant eyes. Even though he was angry, her heart was racing with a strange sense of joy, which left her feeling conflicted.

Afraid that he might notice her state, she tried to compose herself, but Seung-jo’s hands began unbuttoning her blouse. Frozen in place, Su-eon could only open and close her mouth, unable to speak.

“Why…”

“Show me the wound on your neck.”

Even though he was already undressing her, the fact that he phrased it as a request was absurd. But the tension in the air left her unable to respond. Pop, pop. The buttons, already loose, came undone without resistance.

Seung-jo’s hand stopped at the center of her chest before slipping inside her blouse to gently brush over her shoulder. The fabric slid down her arms and fell to the floor.

When he saw the red and purple handprints covering her neck and collarbone, the expression on Seung-jo’s face vanished completely. His reaction made Su-eon’s heart tremble again.

“Does it hurt?”

“A little… it hurts.”

A soft sigh of regret escaped Seung-jo’s lips. His fingers, as they touched her neck, moved as if they were handling something fragile and delicate. Su-eon felt like she could become addicted to this tenderness, so she decided she would never reveal that her answer had been a lie.

She wrapped her arms around Seung-jo’s neck. Beneath the shirt pressed against her bare skin, she could feel his warmth radiating.

“Does it hurt that much?”

As she suddenly clung to him, Seung-jo wrapped his arms around her waist. Pat, pat. Like a mother soothing a child, his hand gently stroked her back. He didn’t go any further. In the end, unable to hold back, Su-eon asked him a question.

“…Why are you holding back?”

In truth, it was the question she had wanted to ask ever since she let him into her home.

“You’re holding back, aren’t you? This whole time.”

They both knew exactly what was pressing against her so firmly that it hurt, yet neither of them made any effort to move away or acknowledge it. That raw, undeniable desire pointed to only one thing.

Even though she knew, Su-eon kept testing him. She wanted to know what this man truly thought of her. How much of it was genuine? Would he cross the line and act recklessly, thinking she had already fallen for him? Or would he act more cunningly, aiming for something else?

Or maybe he’d notice her games and be repulsed. Just because a wall was slightly broken didn’t mean a person would change. Ji Su-eon, who was used to mistrusting and doubting others, hadn’t changed either.

Seung-jo let out a soft laugh.

“It’s just my personality.”

Su-eon crossed her arms and frowned at Seung-jo.  

Su-eon frowned, pulling back her arms to glare at him. 

Just? That’s it? Just his nature to hold back? Was he saying he had great self-control?

Seung-jo let out a low chuckle as he watched the chaos of confusion spread across Su-eon’s face.  

“I like it when you act cute. That’s why I want to keep looking at you.”  

“…”  

“Of course, s*x would be great too. But even just being close to you like this feels so good.”  

Su-eon’s cheeks flushed bright red.  

“See? Like this.”

“That” was exactly what he wanted to see more of. Muttering under his breath, Seung-jo held Su-eon’s reddened face in his hands and brushed his lips over her skin as if he were smoothing it out. His warm breath spread across her skin, and Su-eon felt like she was about to be consumed by the heat.  

“Then… then, does that mean… you’re not going to do it with me?”  

Su-eon hated how her voice sounded so flustered. Seung-jo laughed again.  

“I will.”  

Su-eon’s eyes widened like a startled rabbit. Keeping his gaze fixed on her, Seung-jo slid his hand down her neck, brushing against her skin, and slowly moved lower. His lips landed on the exposed skin above her chest, just visible beneath her innerwear.  

“When your heart stops racing so much.”  

Feeling her face flush even hotter, Su-eon turned her head away. 

Was he some kind of psychic? 

She thought to herself, 

I’m doomed. He knows everything. I’ve been completely found out.  

Why do I keep showing him such embarrassing sides of myself? 

She wanted to appear more mature, more composed, and far cooler, but nothing was going the way she wanted.  

“…You’re teasing me because I’m clumsy, aren’t you?”  

“Yes.”  

“…!”  

“That’s why I don’t want to make any mistakes. If I let my guard down, you’ll run away in an instant.”  

“…”  

“I’ve only just gotten to the point where I can touch you. It’d be a problem if you ran off now.”  

Watching Su-eon’s face change from red to pale and back again, Seung-jo’s eyes crinkled with satisfaction.  

“Maybe it’s just my face. What if you’re disappointed after sleeping with me? What if it’s not fun, or you lose interest quickly?”  

Su-eon muttered, furrowing her brows.  

“Then I’ll tell you.”  

“…!”  

“Or… should I not tell you?”  

Seung-jo ran his hand over his mouth as he watched Su-eon, her wide eyes staring at him as she debated what to say. He tried to suppress his laughter, but it was impossible. Did she even realize how adorable she was with everything she did?  

“Tell me.”  

Still fiddling with the hem of her blouse as if she were deep in thought, Su-eon finally spoke.  

“If you do lose interest or get tired of me quickly, I think it’s better to be honest about it instead of hiding it.”  

Looking into her serious eyes, Seung-jo nodded.  

“Alright.”  

“I don’t want to waste my time doubting you, waiting, or wearing myself out.”  

“Got it.”  

“…It might happen sooner than you think. I can be a pretty obsessive person.”  

“Yeah, I can see that.”  

“How can you agree with me? Does that mean you’re already tired of me?”  

Flustered, Su-eon raised her voice as she questioned him. Seung-jo burst into laughter. She was beautiful. Her constant suspicion, her pretense of knowing everything about the world, her attempts to act tough to protect herself—it was all just so beautiful to him. Even her anxiety over whether he’d grow tired of her was endearing in his eyes.  

“Ah. This is bad.”  

Suddenly, he covered his forehead with his hand.  

“What is?”  

When Su-eon grabbed his arm and tilted her head curiously, asking why he was acting that way, Seung-jo gave her a troubled smile again.  

“I don’t like doing things unprepared.”  

Pulling Su-eon closer by the waist, Seung-jo finished unbuttoning her blouse.  

“And I hate rushing through things even more.”  

Tap. Tap. The blouse came undone, and as it opened, Su-eon’s eyes widened in shock. She had let her guard down, only to feel completely caught off guard.  

“You said… you said you weren’t going to do anything earlier…”  

“Yeah, I’m not going to.”  

“…Then why are you taking my clothes off?”  

“I’m just going to look.”  

As he casually pulled one sleeve of her blouse off, Su-eon suddenly felt a wave of fear. 

Is this okay? Should I be letting this happen?

Her confusion was written all over her face.  

“A-are you going to do it? You’re going to, aren’t you? Just tell me already—I’m not ready yet!”  

“Really? After you’ve teased me so much?”  

“That’s because you were holding back too much! It’s weird! Other guys would—ow!”  

Before she could finish, her skin beneath her shoulder was suddenly bitten. Seung-jo buried his nose between her arm and chest, taking a deep breath, and then rubbed his lips over the spot he had bitten.  

“Don’t talk about other men when in bed. It’s rude.”  

Rude? Did he just say rude? 

Su-eon couldn’t believe her ears and protested.  

“We’re not in bed, though.”  

“Oh, you’re right. Let’s fix that.”  

Seung-jo scooped Su-eon up and stood effortlessly. The sudden height made her feel like her head might hit the ceiling, and she clung tightly to his shoulders with both arms. She felt completely overwhelmed, as if she were being devoured whole. Her heart pounded so hard she thought it might explode.  

She wanted to act more natural, more composed, and more confident. This wasn’t the version of Ji Su-eon she wanted to show him—fumbling and flustered like a complete amateur. She tried to calm herself, recalling the times she had steadied her nerves with deep breaths while standing at the starting line for a race. But just as she began to regain her composure, she suddenly let out a loud shout.  

“Your hands…! Where are your hands going right now?”  

Laughing, Seung-jo tightened his grip on her hips and pulled her even closer. Then, with one swift motion, he kicked the bedroom door shut with his foot.