Do Not Feed Recklessly - Chapter 3. Part 2

‘Well, I’m still new… It’s normal not to understand everything.’

Jia reassured herself, trying to rationalize the situation. She nodded along to their conversations, even though most of it went over her head.

Each time the team leader or other members emptied their glasses, she quickly refilled them, dutifully playing the role expected of her.

Despite her efforts to blend in, the uneasiness lingered, making the evening drag on longer than it should.

Jia felt like an outsider but kept reminding herself that it was just because she was new, and this was her first time meeting everyone.

‘It’s just awkward because it’s my first day.’ she reassured herself, sitting awkwardly with a bottle of soju in hand, trying to focus on the positive aspects of the company—like the good benefits and the freedom to use vacation days.

She wasn’t sure how long she had been sitting there, nodding absentmindedly to the conversations, her eyes glazed over.

Before she knew it, the clock was nearing 9 p.m. The team leader, now visibly tipsy, staggered as he stood up, waving the receipt in his hand.

“Alright, alright. Yu, you can head home now, okay? We’ll be going for the second round… just the guys.”

The team leader said, swaying as he spoke, making it clear Jia wasn’t invited to the next part of the night.

Jia, who had spent the entire evening pouring drinks, quickly slipped into a taxi as the team leader practically pushed her out, insisting she head home.

‘Was this really my welcome party?’ she wondered, feeling confused by the whole experience. It was her first time dealing with the complexities of working life and it all felt overwhelming.

‘Wow, what a mess.’ she thought as she stared out of the taxi window, feeling slightly tipsy and lost in thought. She was so tired and knew she’d sleep as soon as she got home.

But the worst part? She had to be back at work by 9 am the next day.

‘Ugh, I’m so tired!’

Jia’s phone was flooded with worried messages from her parents. She quickly looked through them and sent back a quick reply. By the time she got home, it was almost 10 p.m. The harsh reality hit her: even if she showered and went straight to bed, she’d only get about seven hours of sleep.

‘Only three more days until the weekend.’ she reminded herself.

Maybe she’d explore places like Yeonnam-dong or Seongsu-dong on Saturday. The thought of that kept her going.

Even though it was only her first day, Jia was already beginning to understand why office workers so desperately longed for the weekend.

‘Two weeks into company life.’ 

Jia’s dark circles had deepened, casting shadows under her eyes.

When she first arrived in Korea, she had been full of excitement – happy to be back home and eager to start a new chapter. But in less than a month, she had become just another tired office worker, drained by the harsh realities of daily life.

‘I never realized how exhausting a 9 a.m. start could be.’ she thought as she squeezed into the packed subway, notoriously known as the hell train.

Her only relief was that it was Friday. With that in mind, Jia sighed in relief and resigned herself to the push and pull of the crowded train.

Lately, she couldn’t shake the nagging doubt that returning to Korea might have been a mistake. If she had at least settled into her job smoothly, it might have been easier to bear. But with work being as difficult as it was, her anxiety only kept growing.

It felt as if the team worked perfectly well without her, and Jia felt excluded, no matter how hard she tried to fit in.

Whenever she tried to be proactive and ask questions, the team leader would dismiss her and assign her menial tasks like fetching coffee.

‘No, I can’t judge everything based on two weeks.’ she told herself.

‘I need to give it at least a year. I’m still new, so it’s normal not to be fully adjusted yet…’

Whenever anxiety crept in, Jia forced herself to think positively and tried to stay optimistic. After all, she had worked hard to secure a convenient apartment near the subway, with her parents’ help. Failing to last even a year and returning to Australia would feel like a humiliating defeat. She couldn’t allow that to happen—at least not so soon.

‘Being a student really was the best…’

Jia thought, realizing how much she missed the breaks and the freedom of school life.

The idea of working every day without a long holiday, like a school break, made the future feel bleak.

Every day, Jia was swept up in the crowd during her commute, and once she arrived at work, she felt even more isolated.

The team rushed around in chaos, barely acknowledging her, leaving her awkwardly trying to find ways to fill the time.

She had a mentor, Assistant Manager Jung, but he always seemed too busy. Whenever Jia asked a question or tried to engage with him, he would give her an irritated look before assigning her mindless tasks like printing documents or running small errands.

It became clear that being new wasn’t just about learning on the job – it was about navigating a lonely and frustrating experience.

Jia often wondered, ‘Did I really study so hard just to end up like this?’

But she tried to reassure herself, believing that with time, she would be given real tasks and responsibilities. For now, she reminded herself, she just had to be patient.

The days flew by. Before she knew it, the sun was setting and the clock was approaching 7 p.m. One good thing about the company, at least, was the lack of a strict overtime culture. It wasn’t exactly encouraged to leave at 6 pm, but most people started packing up by 6.30 pm.

‘I just need to go home and rest…’

Jia thought, eager to escape the office and find some peace at home.

Her steps quickened at the thought of leaving. She used to walk at a leisurely pace, but now she found herself speed walking, hoping to catch an earlier subway.

Once on the train, her routine kicked in: she opened her food delivery app, which had quickly become an essential part of her commute.

The sheer variety of food never ceased to amaze her – everything from fried chicken to bossam, jokbal, and grilled pork belly was just a few taps away.

Ordering dinner for a quiet meal alone, often accompanied by a drink, had become one of her little pleasures after a long day at work.

‘Korea definitely has its perks.’

Jia thought with a small smile as she scrolled through her options, already looking forward to her evening meal.

Amid the crowded subway during rush hour, she quickly placed an order for bossam through her phone. She also planned to pick up a bottle of soju from the convenience store on her way home.

With the weekend just around the corner, she was excited for a relaxing night of late-night snacks, a drink, and the luxury of sleeping in.

‘It was going to be a perfect Friday night’—or so she thought. 

That was until she saw the shadowy figure standing outside her apartment.