Chapter 19

Aneta got into the carriage and fell asleep without even having a chance to talk. Carlos embraced her leaning body and stroked her hair with a gentle touch.

He would be lying if there was no selflessness in it. 

Love, affection, worry, longing, and possessiveness.

These words were not enough to contain his feelings, which were growing day by day.

But he didn’t bother to find another word. There will be no satisfaction, and he will end up endlessly throwing himself into a wandering search for answers.

Aneta.

The three syllables of the name alone create such a deep resonance and tremble. Is there any need for any other words?

Carlos gently kissed Aneta’s closed eyes. He knew the sadness hidden beneath them.

Though he had encountered countless whirlpools of such emotions by her side, he couldn’t bring himself to ask why she was tormented.

The moment he put it into words, the moment she realized, she would forever leave his side.

It was a gut feeling, like an instinct.

At first, he thought that her superficial sadness might have been caused by unhappiness related to her family history. But her darkness was deeper and sharper than that.

Aneta was always alert and anxious. As if she were being threatened by something intangible.

If only he could, he wanted to swallow up all her darkness. He wanted to take everything she faced upon herself.

And if she could smile, then he is willing to sacrifice anything, even his life, which he would gladly give.

“I love you, Aneta.”

Once again, the unanswered whisper of love rang through the air.

  ***

Aneta, who had fallen into a deep sleep, opened her eyes when she felt something jumping onto the bed.

It came to her side and began to weigh down her entire body, and soon it began licking her lips and cheeks without distinction.

Aneta frowned at the rough texture. As she tried to focus her blurry vision on the large black figure, the voice of Carlos that followed revealed the identity of the culprit.

“Come here now, Tyr.” 

Aneta gasped as she recovered her vision and realized it was Tyr, Carlos’s pet dog, on top of her.

“Ah.”

From its appearance resembling a lion to its extraordinary size, its jet-black and abundant fur, and its golden eyes that are slightly more yellowish than his master’s.

As she studied his fierce features, Aneta reached out and gently scratched him under the chin in a familiar gesture.

“It’s been a long time, Tyr.”

“Woof!”

Tyr, who had been ignoring his master’s call, responded vigorously when Aneta called his name and began rubbing his face against hers.

When he expressed his happiness by constantly wagging his abundant tail, Carlos, who was already accustomed to discrimination, touched his forehead.

“That, that. Look at the flirting. It was almost confusing who the real owner was.”

Carlos sat down on the edge of the bed with a sigh. As he watches his dog be tirelessly affectionate, he shows no signs of cowardice.

“I envy you.”

“Me?”

Aneta raised herself with the question. Tyr, noticing her, briefly nuzzled her before playfully bumping into her as she straightened up.

“No, I envy Tyr. I wanted to wake you up with a kiss. But it seems I lost that chance while I was distracted.”

With a look that proved it wasn’t a joke, Carlos’s eyes were filled with envy as he looked at Tyr.

He waited a bit longer to give Tyr some more time to relieve his longing before issuing a firm command.

“Tyr, it’s time to go out now.”

Whimpering with a pitiful expression, Carlos remained unfazed. Knowing it was just an attempt to evoke sympathy, Carlos shook his head as if to say there was no way.

“No.”

As if he had never seen such a pitiful appearance, the stubborn Tyr jumped off the bed, flicked his owner’s leg, and passed by.

Stopping in front of the door, as if asking if he would let him go, this time Carlos firmly shook his head again.

As Tyr, who turned his head in frustration at the situation not going as planned, left with threatening steps, Aneta, who watched with a smile, tidied up her disheveled hair.

“But why was I sleeping in your bedroom? ”

“You fell asleep in the carriage, so I thought I might as well bring you along to keep me company. But Tyr ruined the whole plan.”

Carlos remembered his small, no, now uncontrollably huge, friend.

He would have to spend the next day constantly soothing the little guy, but even though he was a pet, he didn’t want to share the time with her.

Their time together would be insufficient for a while.

Carlos reminded himself that Viscount Folter’s detention would begin tomorrow. The thought of not being able to be with her already made the world seem colorless.

Although he longed to stay by Aneta’s side, he quickly reined in his emotions.

It was Aneta’s plan. So he couldn’t afford to mess it up.

“You seem to be fulfilling your selflessness pretty well on your own.”

Aneta gestured towards the bedding she had just covered herself with. He must have found a new perfume because she smelled a familiar scent.

“But Aneta, my feelings for you are so deep that they are far from being satisfied by that alone.”

No matter how much of the same perfume he sprayed on it, this could not be completely the same as her scent. It’s natural to feel differently depending on your body’s scent.

Feeling hurt by this realization, Carlos recalled an object from the back of his mind.

Thinking it might fulfill another selfless need, he reached for it.

“There’s also a cream with the same scent. Would you like to try it? ”

“Cream?”

“They say it’s unusual because you apply it with your hands.”

“Ah, hand cream.” Aneta nodded her head, wondering if such a thing existed in this place.

“Instead, I’d like to apply it myself.”

“Then I’ll decline.”

“I went to the trouble of getting it for you. At least let me show some effort.”

“…….”

“Starting tomorrow, I’ll be incredibly busy with Viscount Folter’s affairs, I won’t have time to rest properly, and even a brief moment to see you might be impossible.”

Carlos continued to say things that would weaken her heart. In response, Aneta sighed as if to say, 

“Do as you wish.”

It was a silent permission.

Seeing Aneta’s mood change, Carlos quickly opened the lid. He scooped out some cream with a slightly viscous texture onto his hand and soon reached for Aneta’s hand.

“I got this one for me, too.”

“I’m afraid I don’t even know that.” 

Carlos lowered himself as if making a confession of love, intertwining his fingers with hers.

“It feels much better than I expected…”

The felt curves evoked an unknown feeling. Carlos rolled his joints.

Aneta observed his actions of caressing her hand attentively. It felt like he was trying to remember every detail of her skin, sending a steady touch.

Aneta withdrew her hand from his as his fingers began to slide up her wrist. It wasn’t just her hands that felt moist, as if soaked in moisture.

The beautiful golden eyes were moist and filled with regret.

“Just a little more.”

Though he pleaded with his eyes, Aneta remained firm.

“No.”

Carlos rose from his resigned posture.

“It was a day filled with your desires, from beginning to end.”

“It’s not over yet. I’m still free tonight.”

“No way, Carlos.”

It was already dark outside the window. Aneta stood up, saying she had to go back.

“Linden said he’d prepare a meal for you.”

“If it’s a favor, tell him I’ll decline, since I’ve done him a favor once before.”

“No. You won’t.”

Aneta’s expression turned puzzled at his unhesitating assertion.

“What do you mean? You sound overly confident.”

“While you were asleep, I instructed the investigation regarding Philo and Folter, which will probably be finished by the time you finish dinner. If you decline the offer, I’ll send the papers to your office in the morning, but I thought you’d want to see them as soon as possible.”

It was the right answer. Aneta couldn’t deny his words. Her heart was already leaning toward accepting the dinner proposal.

“I didn’t think you’d go to such lengths.”

“I know it’s a sly move, but please look at it favorably. I’ll do anything as long as I can be by your side.”

“I lost.”

How could he say such words without a change in expression? Aneta gave up, feeling as if she had discovered a new talent in Carlos.

There is no way to withstand a man who was the emperor’s right-hand man, especially when he charged in with such determination.

“But it’s only for meals. I hope you don’t change your mind by saying it’s dessert or tea later.”

“Trust me.”

How did they end up in this situation? Aneta smiled helplessly as she looked at Carlos, who was smiling with satisfaction.

He was someone she couldn’t hate, even though she always felt like she should. If it weren’t for him, who else could she receive such blindly confessed love from?

The notification that dinner was ready came frighteningly quickly after Aneta’s acceptance.

She walked alongside Carlos, who seemed excited. It had been so long since they had a meal together that she couldn’t remember exactly when it was.

Carlos didn’t try to guide Aneta as he used to when she was still a duchess back then. 

Everything seemed unchanged from then on.

The meal proceeded smoothly. The conversation between the two mainly revolved around matters related to the guard.

“It’s surprising that such incidents occur even in the capital. It seems like we need to fix it as soon as possible.”

Carlos, cutting the steak into bite-sized pieces and placing it in front of her, revealed his concern with a serious expression.

“According to protocol, we should note it in the interim report and submit it.”

Aneta spoke as she speared a piece of salad with her fork.

“But in this case, I think it would be better to report it directly without following the usual procedures.”

There comes a time in life when you have to ignore the rules and be flexible, and Aneta believed that moment was now.

Delaying the report according to protocol would undoubtedly invite Russell’s disfavor.

Russell would have had some understanding of the situation by now, but since he was not there, reporting was inevitable.

“Although it’s not related to military affairs, I think it’s not a bad idea to seek help from Duke Lopelac, especially since I can’t be there to help with this one.”

“I agree with you. That’s why I’m planning to ask for Tereza’s cooperation on this.”

The people around the Emperor often did whatever was asked of them, regardless of department, and Aneta was no exception.

Aneta realized that she needed Tereza’s help with something that wasn’t her usual area of responsibility. Reporting to Russell wasn’t the only thing she had to do.

As she organized her thoughts in her head, she continued to shovel food into her mouth. She knew the chef’s skills, but she didn’t have time to enjoy the taste of the food.

Lost in thought, Aneta suddenly lifted her gaze from the food. As if she had been waiting for it, she looked at the food in front of him.

There was not the slightest sign that it had been touched. 

He invited her to eat with him, and all he’s done is watch her eat.

“Aren’t you eating?”

“I’m eating.”

“You don’t look like you’ve touched it.”

He didn’t even slice his steak. Aneta let go of her fork and looked at him.

“I’m reflecting. I feel sorry for causing you trouble with something that wasn’t even planned. I apologize.”

“It’s not that much trouble.”

An ambiguous denial came out of Aneta’s mouth, recalling the comfort she received on the boat.

In response, Carlos tapped his lips with his extended index finger.

“I have something I want to give you as an apology. What do you think?”

Although his seductive gaze was alluring, it didn’t sway her.

Aneta picked up the fork she had momentarily set down and declined the offer.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t think I need it.”