Even after Eloise left, I stayed leaning against the tree for a long time. Eventually, exhausted, I sank to the ground, and suddenly, a large shadow cast over me. Startled by the darkness, I looked up to see Ian standing there, silhouetted by the moonlight.

Even in the dimness, I could tell at once that he was genuinely worried about me.

“Are you in pain?”

“Sorry?”

“Is something hurting you?”

“No.”

“Then, why…?”

Ian bit his lip mid-sentence. I laughed.

“I’ve been away too long, haven’t I? Could you help me up? My legs are sore.”

“Of course.”

He held his hand out to me willingly, again without gloves. I took his hand and stood, walking alongside him. After sitting on the ground so long, my legs actually were sore, though I hadn’t intended to show it. Noticing my discomfort, Ian pointed ahead.

“Shall we rest over there?”

He gestured to a glass gazebo, a little distance from the party. I had designed it, inspired by *The Sound of Music.* With its white flowers bathed in moonlight, the gazebo looked so breathtakingly romantic that I wondered why I’d ever dismissed it. Just looking at it made me feel a flutter of excitement, and I nodded.

“Yes, let’s.”

As soon as I agreed, Ian picked me up. Having experienced a “princess carry” a few times, I was starting to get used to it. He set me down on a bench inside the gazebo, then sat next to me.

“May I stay here with you?”

I nodded. Although we were set to divorce tomorrow, I had asked him to keep some distance, as it would be odd for us to act close in public. It seemed he had diligently respected my request until he noticed I’d disappeared. I smiled to myself. What would this man do without me? After hesitating, Ian spoke.

“Liv, you look beautiful tonight.”

It was such a simple comment, yet he’d hesitated. I chuckled.

“You look wonderful, too.”

He was wearing a suit I’d designed for him. I felt a little proud. Judging by the guests’ reactions, maybe modern suits would soon become the trend among men. While I was momentarily lost in thought, Ian was deep in his own worries, furrowing his brow. He sighed before speaking.

“‘Beautiful’ doesn’t seem quite enough, but I know you dislike being called ‘gorgeous,’ so I don’t know what else to say.”

…He was completely serious. I burst out laughing.

“Don’t say it, then.”

“But…”

“I mean it. Don’t.”

He shut his mouth at my words. To anyone else, he’d look like he was simply expressionless, but I could see a hint of disappointment. Was I imagining things? After a moment of silence, his face brightened, as if he’d just remembered something.

“Oh, I planted them around here.”

“Hmm?”

“The flowers you said were beautiful.”

Confused, I tilted my head, and he clarified with a brighter expression.

“They’re called starflowers.”

Ah, I suddenly realized he remembered my casual comment about those flowers. But… he actually planted them? I stood up and looked around the glass gazebo. Sure enough, small white wildflowers were scattered around the area. I hadn’t noticed them from a distance, but up close, they were the flowers I remembered. Ian, standing beside me, smiled.

“They bloom right around this time.”

I sighed and turned to him.

“Ian, do you remember me telling you that these are notoriously invasive weeds?”

“Yes.”

Unbothered, Ian smiled as if it were nothing.

“Their meaning is ‘memory.’”

I looked at him as if he were a stubborn child. Ian flinched slightly, giving me a sheepish smile.

“Don’t look at me so harshly. I remember everything you said about them. You said that to fully uproot them, you have to remove every single fiber of their roots, and even then, you might look back one day to see them sprouting again.”

He remembered well. The fact that he knew this yet planted them in the garden was hard to believe. I could only imagine the gardener’s shock. Most people go crazy trying to get rid of these weeds. Ian just smiled, unfazed by my incredulous gaze.

“They’re pretty, aren’t they?”

As if pleading for me to understand, he looked down at the mass of flowers blooming at our feet. Small, simple, and endearing, they gleamed white in the moonlight. Like stars scattered across the night sky. Is that why they’re called starflowers?

“The only flower you ever said was beautiful.”

Honestly, it was beautiful. I looked quietly at the flowers and said,

“The gardener might resent me for this.”

“Well, if I told them to fill the entire garden with starflowers, they probably wouldn’t. It’s a flower that thrives on its own if left alone.”

It made sense. If the garden were restored to its original form and the remaining spaces filled with starflowers, the gardeners would have almost nothing to do. I imagined the garden in its eventual completed state.

A garden finished with woods and wildflowers wouldn’t look too bad. I might not get to see it, but it would surely be beautiful. I laughed a little. A man who claimed to love me had never once bought me flowers but was now planting pretty weeds in the garden.

At the same time, I thought of the flowers I’d pulled out in frustration, too embarrassed to be considered foolish. I’d thrown the clumps I tore up onto the lake, watching them sink. It had felt so desolate, as if the flowers were a reflection of my own life. What if I had just left them there? There was no reason not to; it wasn’t as if I was trying to grow crops in the garden. If I’d filled that large cottage garden with herbs and starflowers, maybe I would’ve loved that house more.

I sighed. The past was the past, but I couldn’t help feeling both grateful and resentful that Ian had brought back feelings I had long buried. I didn’t have much time left to regret them. Forcing a bright smile, I said,

“What if one day you want to fill this garden with other flowers?”

Ian looked at me silently for a moment. His prolonged silence made me avert my gaze. As I searched for a way to change the subject, he spoke softly.

“I don’t think that will ever happen.”

“…”

“No matter how many times you pull them out, I know these flowers will come back to fill the garden.”

The starflowers swayed gently in the breeze.

“That must be why they mean ‘memory.’ No matter how much you try to erase them, they always sprout again…”

His voice was quiet, and the air seemed to grow heavy with it.

“I regret it.”

What did he regret? I could only stare blankly at him. And I regretted it—I wished I hadn’t looked. I wished I could have avoided seeing the pain in his eyes until the end.

“After you’re gone, the only memories I’ll be left with will be regrets.”

A warm breeze blew in through the open glass door of the gazebo.

“So… can’t you make just one memory for me?”

This warmth must be because it’s summer.

“Ian…”

Under the full moon, even the light scattering over his golden hair looked brilliant. I took a step back, overwhelmed. Ian stood still as if rooted to the spot. If he’d reached for me, I could’ve easily escaped.

“Just once. Kiss me once, Liv.”

He just stood there, watching me with such sad eyes that I couldn’t run away.

“So that even after you’re gone, I can live with that memory.”

“…”

“Can’t you?”

No matter how pitiful, I should refuse him. It would be the right thing to do. Even if it became a beautiful memory, it would only cause pain to the one left behind. But…

“Ian, I…”

“As you said, Liv, I don’t know what love is.”

I flinched.

“If you’re going to say again that my feelings aren’t love, then just don’t. I already know.”

That wasn’t it. What I meant to say was…

“Calling it love might make me look foolish or inadequate, I know. Can’t you just pretend not to notice? Even if I look like a fool, can’t you remember me as a man who loved you?”

My heart hurt. For the first time, his resentment felt like a searing wound in my chest.

“I kept trying, but I don’t know. My feelings haven’t changed from the beginning to now, and I want to call it love, but if you say it’s not, then it probably isn’t.”

“…”

“It might be an obsession, or a lingering attachment, or just pure selfishness. But I just want you.”

The things I’d said would scar him for life.

“Don’t cry.”

Ian came closer. His warm fingertips gently wiped the tears from my cheeks. I couldn’t say anything, even in that moment. I was too afraid of what words might leave scars on his soul. He pleaded softly.

“I’m sorry, Liv. Please, don’t cry.”

Whatever I said, he would remember forever. The starflowers filling the garden would remind him of today. So I decided to say nothing. I just took a single step forward.

On a hot summer night like this, on a sleepless night…

I stood on tiptoe and wrapped my arms around his neck. Ian held me around the waist, steadying my unsteady posture. Without any cue, we found each other’s lips.

I hoped he’d remember this kiss, instead of all the hurtful words.

Tears kept falling, even with my eyes closed, because the light was too bright.