Chapter 47 – The Divorce Agreement

During the six months I lived as Anne, I collapsed twice—once two hours into my job at the factory, exhausted, and another time during opera rehearsal. Both times, the cause was physical overexertion, and I regained consciousness in less than half a day.

In contrast, the three times I collapsed recently were all after encountering Ian. It seemed that when the cause was psychological, it took a day or two for me to wake up. It wasn’t just that my magic surged from overworking my heart; it seemed my emotions had a significant impact as well.

“Honestly, I thought we’d have to fight a few more times, but I’m really grateful.”

Ian gave me a bittersweet smile. We had decided to get a divorce. I felt sorry for Ian, but this was the happiest I’d felt since marrying him.

He agreed to the divorce, offered to find me a place to live afterward, and even promised to provide monthly support. I was thrilled. Though there were some minor conditions—like informing him if I wanted to sell the house or move and that I’d have to meet him monthly to receive the money—it was a small price to pay. Humming, I accepted the divorce agreement he handed me.

It wasn’t fully completed yet; we’d still need to work with lawyers to finalize the divorce contract. But to prove his promise, Ian had already stamped it with the Keppel family seal. I carefully folded it and placed it in my handbag, then climbed into the carriage. Ian naturally escorted me in and followed me inside.

“We’re heading straight to the palace, right?”

“Yes. What about you, Ian?”

“I’ll go with you. I have some business to handle at the palace as well.”

“Suit yourself.”

“I’ll stop by the mansion in the afternoon and be home before dinner.”

Oh, okay… It was the first time he’d ever discussed his schedule with me, and I awkwardly nodded in response.

“What about you, Liv?”

“Pardon?”

“When will you be coming home?”

Me? Do I need to inform him too?

“Well, I plan to visit my mother after finishing up at the palace…”

I wasn’t sure how long the conversation would take. Seeing me trail off, Ian nodded.

“It’s dangerous to travel at night. If it seems like it will be late, it might be better to stay over.”

Wow, he’s gotten really cool about this.

I nodded awkwardly again. I’d never imagined having such a conversation with him, so it felt very strange. On the other hand, Ian seemed quite calm. Maybe because he had made up his mind about the divorce, he no longer seemed to cling to me. Honestly, I was worried he might follow me around all day again, but luckily, that didn’t happen. He rubbed his forehead, looking a bit troubled.

“I’m sorry, but… can I work now?”

Whoa, he just apologized! What in the world? I was so shocked that I didn’t respond, and Ian hesitantly continued.

“I know it’s not polite, but I’m really busy.”

“Oh, of course. Go ahead and work. I was just surprised you apologized, Ian. You never used to care about things like that.”

Ian paused, his hand still on the papers, then looked at me.

“…I’m sorry about that too. Back then, I didn’t know what to say when I saw your face…”

“Wow, Ian. I feel the same way right now, so just go ahead and work.”

Ian hesitated when I interrupted him, then turned back to his papers. But even as he tried to focus, he sighed, clearly still distracted. Without lifting his eyes from the documents, he spoke again.

“And I also noticed that you seemed more at ease when I said I was busy.”

“…”

“Am I wrong?”

He’s right. He knows me better than I expected.

I was surprised; I could only widen my eyes. Ian resumed looking at the documents, and I sat across from him, lost in thoughts about the past.

I came into this marriage with nothing, with only myself to rely on. From the moment I signed the marriage contract, I resolved to become the ideal lady for the Keppel family. Pretending to love my husband was part of that, and honestly, it was the most challenging part.

He was so cold that I shrank back every time I saw him, and pretending to be in love was exhausting. It was much easier for me to sip tea while waiting outside the door, sigh once, and go home.

It was a performance born out of necessity. That way, my mother would believe I stayed in the Keppel household because I loved Ian, and I could enjoy a noble lifestyle without getting too close to any man. The three years I endured with that act made Ian expect something from me, and I suddenly felt a pang of guilt.

The reason I chose Ian was that I believed he loved Celia. He was my favorite, yes, but as a character in a novel, not as a man. That’s why I didn’t feel guilty about using him. I never thought he would expect anything from me or that he could be hurt by me.

“…How did you know?”

How foolish I was. It was me who lacked a sense of reality. But really, who wouldn’t feel detached from reality if they were reborn in the world of a novel?

“How did you recognize me as the ‘Red Lips’?”

Ian lifted his gaze from the papers and slowly looked at me.

“Don’t worry, I’m not planning to run away again. I’m just curious.”

“…I didn’t know at first. But when I heard you sing, I realized it was you.”

Just from that? I couldn’t believe it and chuckled.

“You were looking for the person who signed the card at the opera house. Didn’t you already know then?”

Ian closed the folder of documents.

“I deliberately wrote in a different style. How did you recognize my handwriting?”

“I know all your handwriting.”

“…So, how did you know?”

Whenever I wrote letters to Ian, I always tried my best to make them look elegant. I had thought there was no way he would recognize my hastily scribbled handwriting.

“I figured it out while managing the estate after you collapsed. I saw all the work you had done.”

Ah, I understood immediately. There were piles of ledgers and exchanged letters from that time.

“That’s surprising. I thought Ian would have neglected the estate all this time.”

In reality, before I married into the family, estate management and internal affairs were all handled by a proxy, and the lord’s office was stacked high with documents needing approval. It couldn’t be helped since national affairs kept him busy. Ian gave a faint smile.

“It was your effort, so I didn’t want to ruin it.”

Ugh, I felt a bit embarrassed, realizing I never really paid attention to the estate’s affairs. I quickly tried to change the subject.

“So you figured it out from my handwriting? Did you already know I was coming to the concert?”

“No. I really didn’t know. The young lady in the yellow dress said she asked a member with beautiful handwriting to write it, but she never mentioned that the writer was the ‘Red Lips’ woman.”

I was amazed that Ian simply believed what Betty said and didn’t press further. That wasn’t like him at all. Sensing my confusion, Ian gave a small smile.

“I knew that young lady knew something, but I couldn’t push her. At first, it seemed like she was interested in me, but when I asked who wrote the card, she suddenly went quiet and wanted to end the conversation quickly.

Since she cared so much about you, I couldn’t bring myself to pressure her. All I knew was that you were a member of the opera troupe, that you had recently quit, and that you might be leaving the capital soon.”

Pressuring her probably just meant questioning her further, right?

“I had already tightened security at the gates, so I thought I’d catch you there, not that I’d see you boldly standing on stage at the square concert.”

I tried to ignore Ian’s smile.

“So, you really recognized me just by my voice?”

“Yes, and by your eyes.”

“How?”

“I’m not sure.”

How did he recognize me? Ian didn’t elaborate, and I didn’t press further. Instead, I lit some soothing incense in the carriage brazier.

No matter what, Ian didn’t want me to hate him. Somehow, that fact reassured me. As we both fell silent, the carriage was filled with the crackling sound of the fire and the rustling of paper. The warmth and the scent made me feel drowsy, and I soon drifted off to sleep. When I woke up, we had already arrived at the palace.

“Liv.”

I was awakened by the unfamiliar warmth of a touch on my arm. Ian was looking at me with concern.

“Are you okay?”

“…Ah, yes. I must have dozed off for a moment.”

He hesitated, looking uncharacteristically unsure. Seeing that he had something to say, I stared at him, and he cautiously spoke.

“May I escort you, at least to the reception room?”

I wondered what the big deal was.

“Sure.”

When I nodded without hesitation, Ian seemed surprised. He hadn’t expected me to agree so easily. His expressions have really become more varied recently. Maybe it was because he had let go of a lot of things. I smiled slightly.

“Why would I refuse such a gentlemanly offer to escort me?”

“…”

“…It’s not that I hate having you near me or touching me. It wasn’t that I disliked it… I was just scared.”

I could feel Ian stiffen as he held my hand while helping me out of the carriage. When I looked up, his face was expressionless, but his eyes were faintly trembling.

“Hmm. For example… Ah, imagine if Lady Avery followed you around all day.”

“That’s not a fair comparison.”

“Hmm?”

“I wouldn’t want her touching me at all.”

Ah, well. I nodded slightly, letting go of Ian’s hand. As I adjusted my dress and placed my hand back on his arm, I noticed the cufflinks. They were the ones I had given him early in our marriage.

“Then, think back to when we first got married. I must have been a bit of a burden, right?”

“…”

“Oh, I guess that’s not a fair comparison either. Back then, you didn’t even want to touch me.”

Come to think of it, when did he start holding my hand without gloves? It seemed like a long time ago, and as I was trying to recall, Ian sighed and spoke.

“…I understand what you mean.”

So do I. I avoided Ian’s deep, thoughtful gaze and forced myself to keep walking. Now that I think about it, Ian had always been slightly germophobic when it came to romantic relationships, yet I had suddenly tried to play the perfect wife just because we were married. I had been so focused on being the ideal lady that I hadn’t considered his feelings.

Anyway, Ian escorted me to our destination. The documents I brought were unnecessary since the people who saw Ian’s face immediately opened the doors for us. It was almost like having a high-pass ticket. Convenient and nice. As we entered, I saw the people inside stiffen and stand up. Without thinking, I brightly exclaimed,

“Bill”