Having confirmed my mother’s true feelings and clearly expressed my intention to get a divorce, it was time to return. Ian had suggested I could stay the night, but this was Benjamin’s house, where my mother was staying, and I couldn’t just sleep over without permission, even though Benjamin was so busy he practically lived at the palace.

I arrived at the Keppel estate around sunset. Ian was there to greet me.

“You’re back.”

I took his hand as I stepped out of the carriage. Ian’s relief at my return was obvious.

“Did you think I wouldn’t come back?”

“…I thought it was a possibility.”

“What were you going to do if I didn’t?”

“…There wouldn’t have been much I could do.”

Ian escorted me to the dining room; his mood was suddenly somber. I had considered asking for just a light snack since the timing was odd, but it turned out dinner was already prepared, so there was no avoiding it. It was a bit late for dinner, which made me wonder—had they been waiting for me? Seeing the appetizers served as soon as I sat down confirmed that suspicion. I glanced at the empty seat at the head of the table and asked.

“Where is your mother?”

“She’s not at home.”

“Still?”

My worry was evident as I asked, and Ian replied calmly.

“She said she’s been busy.”

I gave up asking Ian and turned to the butler.

“Vanon, do you know where my mother-in-law is?”

“The madam said she would be staying at the Hershey family townhouse for a while. Did you not see her?”

“What? I just came from there…”

Ian looked surprised, as if hearing this for the first time. My mother-in-law rarely leaves the house unless it’s something important. For her to stay at someone else’s house? How uncomfortable must she have been at home? I sighed in frustration.

“I thought you were getting along better with your mother, but I guess not?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Think about it carefully. Did you do something wrong?”

“…”

Ian seemed to be deep in thought but couldn’t come up with anything. Seeing this, Vanon interjected.

“It’s true that she’s busy. She mentioned planning to wrap up her business. The Hershey townhouse is closer to her business, so she decided to stay there for the time being.”

“What?”

Remembering what my mother had told me, my mind started to whirl. Is she planning to close her embroidery workshop and invest that money in my mother’s school?

Knowing how much effort she had put into growing her business, I felt a pang of responsibility. We’re about to part ways—shouldn’t I stop her immediately? I let out an involuntary sigh. Perhaps thinking I was concerned about my mother-in-law, Ian surprisingly said something thoughtful.

“If you’re worried, should I send someone to check if she’s really at the Hershey house?”

“Oh, could you?”

I brightened at his suggestion but quickly felt awkward under his intense gaze. There was something odd in the way he looked at me.

“Is that the right thing to do?”

“…What?”

What kind of strange question is that?

“If you’re worried, sending someone to check on her—does that seem like the right thing to do?”

“Well, of course, I’m worried… It’s late, and it’s dangerous for a lady to be out alone…”

Why do I even need to explain something that is so obvious? As soon as I finished speaking, Ian’s expression inexplicably brightened.

“So if I’m worried when you come home late… can I check on you the same way?”

What?

“…No?”

“How is it different?”

Is he picking a fight? I couldn’t help but reply irritably.

“You and I are strangers now.”

At that, I heard the soft sound of fabric falling to the floor. I turned my head reflexively and saw the butler picking up a dropped napkin with a flustered expression.

“Apologies.”

Since marrying into the Keppel family, I have never seen Vanon make a mistake. My face flushed, and I tried to cool my cheeks with the back of my hand.

“Vanon, it’s fine; you can leave us for now.”

“Understood.”

As soon as Vanon left and closed the door, I leaned in and whispered angrily.

“This is your fault! Why do you say such strange things in front of other people?!”

Honestly, I knew I was being unreasonable. I was the one who failed to distinguish between what should and shouldn’t be said in front of the butler. I had always tried to maintain the facade of a gentle and composed lady, but my mask kept slipping whenever I was around Ian.

I stifled a sigh, bracing myself for whatever Ian might say next. If he asked why it was his fault or questioned what exactly I meant by “strange,” I had several responses lined up in my head, but he remained silent. Glancing at him, I saw that Ian had lowered his gaze, and his quiet demeanor made him look almost despondent. My rising anger began to subside.

“Why do you have to say such weird things…”

I muttered, my voice losing its edge. Ian hesitated before speaking.

“…Phillip said it’s better to ask directly.”

Phillip couldn’t have predicted that Ian would become so strange. Who should I even blame? Seeing that I wasn’t responding, Ian cautiously glanced at me and asked another odd question.

“Then, is it okay until we get divorced?”

Oh, my head hurts. How do I even explain this?

“Ian, since we’ve already decided to divorce, it’s practically like we’re strangers already. If you act too close, it makes me uncomfortable.”

“If we get divorced, you’ll be a stranger to my mother too. I don’t see how it’s different.”

I almost snapped, but I quickly calmed myself. After all, there was nothing wrong with what he said. I sighed.

“As for your mother… you’re right. I overstepped.”

Ian’s face suddenly turned pale.

“That’s not what I meant.”

He opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something, but in the end, he just bit his lip, unable to utter a word. Out of habit, I observed his reaction and then suddenly felt something strange. Ian knew that no matter what he said, I would take it the wrong way, and he was scared.

Ian isn’t a foolish person. Even though he grew up neglected and lacks social skills, he’s managed to navigate society well enough to hide that.

Someone like him suddenly turning into a fool in front of me was entirely my fault. He asked foolish questions because he wanted to align with me in every little thing, watched my reactions, and held back from saying what he wanted, fearing there would be no turning back. It was just like I used to be. I put down my utensils and covered my mouth. I felt like I was going to vomit.

“Liv, are you okay?”

Ian noticed something was wrong with me and rushed over. He leaned down close, holding a napkin, and said,

“If you feel like throwing up, just do it.”

Throw up here? How could I possibly throw up on your hand, at the very least, get a bowl or something… I forced myself to swallow the nausea with some water. A tear slipped out.

“Is it because of me? I’m sorry…”

Even in this situation, he was worried that I might collapse again because of him. I felt sorry for him, but I forced myself to speak.

“No, it’s just motion sickness…”

“Motion sickness?”

“It’s been a while since I was in a carriage.”

That couldn’t be it. The carriage and driver of the Keppel family are the best; there’s no way I would get motion sickness. But I blamed it on that anyway. Ian called for Vanon to bring the physician and some porridge. I quietly let myself be carried like a patient and laid down in my room.

“I’ll stay with you until the doctor arrives.”

Seeing him immediately lower his posture like that, I sighed again.

“…If you don’t want me here, I can wait outside.”

“Just stay.”

The moment I gave him permission, Ian’s expression brightened up. He acted as if he were a servant, bringing water, stoking the fire in the fireplace.

Then, after making sure there were no curtains left undrawn, he went around the room, turning off the lights and returned. Normally, this would be Jane’s job, but seeing Ian do it so naturally left me with mixed feelings. I almost wish Ian would go back to being as shameless and annoying as he used to be. Then I could deal with him more easily.

“Is there anything else you need?”

“…That calming incense… what was it called? Could you light it for me?”

“Loscari, you mean? Is your heart hurting again?”

“No.”

Actually, it hurt a little. But I pulled the sheets up to my lips and tried to speak as casually as I could.

“I like how it makes me feel. I think it’ll help me sleep.”

“You didn’t like it at first, though.”

“I know. They said it was the wizards’ tobacco, and it turns out it’s very pleasant. I wonder if it would be even better if smoked in a pipe?”

“Shall I get one for you tomorrow?”

He asked in such a casual tone, as if he were asking if I wanted some bread for breakfast. I was surprised by Ian’s reaction again. What would people say if they heard a woman smoking in high society? I’d probably be treated like the lowest of the low. Does Ian not care if I’m treated that way?

“If you’re worried about what people will say, I can get it in secret.”

“…Do as you like.”

No, it’s simply because I want it, isn’t it? Why do I keep thinking the worst? Is it because I’m negative to the core? I felt a bit down. Why can’t I just accept his kindness as it is? When I think about it, it makes sense. I can’t even fully trust the genuine love my mother has shown me all my life, so how could I believe Ian’s sincerity?

Is that why I kept getting angry with Ian? Because I wanted to see if he was truly sincere? I felt nauseous again. I was disgusted with myself for trying to manipulate him the moment I gained the upper hand in our relationship. Every time I saw him anxiously reacting to my words, I felt strangely reassured, and I hated myself for it. The memory of my younger self desperately trying to fit into high society and realizing I’m no different from those people who used to ridicule me made me feel so pathetic.

It was Ian’s soft voice that pulled me out of my self-loathing.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t think about how hard this might be for you. I just wanted to have dinner together…”

Ian was doing his best to be honest with me. Seeing him worry that I might be upset after he’d been truthful made me feel a pang of frustration. No, it wasn’t frustration. It was… guilt. I felt sorry for him.

“When you say you’re okay, I want to believe you. So if you’re struggling, I wish you’d tell me.”

It was easier when everything was his fault.

“Now, you don’t have to worry about how I feel. If you’re tired, you can eat in your room. Don’t feel bad about it if I wait for you. That’s what I want.”

What should I do? Even now, he’s saying it’s okay for me to treat him however I like. It felt strange, as if Ian knew exactly what I was feeling and was telling me not to feel guilty.

“Even after we’re divorced, I hope you keep doing that.”

Unable to ignore the sadness in his eyes any longer, I closed mine instead. And soon, sleep overtook me.TL NOTE: Visit dusk blossoms for more advanced chapters and stories