The statues of apostles hanging around the ceiling trembled, their relics shaking violently. At the moment when a sharp sound that could not be recorded in human scales filled the space as if it would shatter it into pieces.

Suddenly, silence ensued.

Still having holy power left within him but unable to use it any further, he finally realized that he had invoked some mystery.

His hair, which had been neatly combed over with hair oil for wearing the ceremonial hat during his coronation ceremony, had long become frizzy after getting wet in the rain and drying. Mishael slowly lifted his head with a face mixed with awe, fear, and anticipation.

―What is so unjust?

The one who moved was an apostle. The tenth among the eleven apostles of the Supreme God, he floated thirteen large and small wheels behind him and flew to stand in the exact center of the space.

―Human. After having received so much love from our Mother to call us forth alone, what is so unjust that you cause such a commotion?

“…….”

―Tsk.

Still propped on the floor and collapsed, the human could only twitch his lips without making any sound, causing the apostle to let out a voice, displeased. After a moment, Mishael’s tightly clenched throat suddenly opened.

“……What exactly.”

―…….

“What exactly did I do wrong?”

―…….

“To me, why did you give such power to someone like me? A power useless at the time it matters……?”

Mishael sobbed with empty eyes fixed on Lionella in front of him. His hand trembled as it reached towards Lionella. Lying on the floor without rejecting him, but also without sharing warmth, his fingertips touched the flesh of her forearm.

“If only I had been powerless all my life…… If I had been useless and incapable all my life, would I not have known someday? If I hadn’t been blinded by the vain hope that I could dominate her, wouldn’t I have had the opportunity to realize that this ugly and damp emotion could also be named as a kind of love?”

―If you want to confess, find a priest; if you need to vent, go to a tavern.

“Yeah…… You said I was given such great power because I was loved. But then…… what can I do?”

―…….

“From when my memories begin, I was already scum. Filling my stomach was more important than conscience, and life was more important than kindness. Me…… why did I obtain this power? Exactly…….

―There is neither cost nor qualification for Mother’s love.

The moment the apostle’s voice rang in his eardrums, tears welled up in Mishael’s eyes.

Yeah. It would have been nice if there was some qualification for me to receive this power. If She had given me this power for some use, I could have clung to it. By blaming the reason for obtaining power and fitting life’s meaning into it, I could have hated myself less for not using my holy power properly.

But the Supreme God had no intention prepared for him; thus, Mishael had obtained his current failure through his own will, purely through his own misjudgment.

So, he had nothing to blame.

What remained was himself, inherently twisted enough not to properly enjoy chance luck.

Should he resent the royalists of Chesed who beheaded his parents? Should he blame his parents who gave birth to him amid a civil war and threw their lives away for their beliefs? Or should he blame all sorts of people who exploited and sold him off from Chesed to Lycius, from Lycius’s back alleys to the Marquis of Parma’s house?

He couldn’t blame Lionella. Instead, should Mishael blame himself for not being docile towards a girl he thought was lovely at first sight and thus messing up their relationship from the very start?

“Maybe it would have been better not to have been born at all.”

The apostle left the grumbling human alone.

“I am…… I never had any qualifications from the beginning. Not only did I not have a chance to have them, but nothing should have come to me either. This power, Lionella, this…… this too miserable and pathetic emotion that I didn’t even know was love…….”

―…….

“Why did I have to be born with such a trivial power, thinking I could be something, thinking I could have Lily…….”

Thump, thump…… The man’s hands formed fists and slowly hit his own chest. Dressed in clothing that proved he received great love from the Supreme God and served by all people, the man wore such a pitiful face.

The light in his red eyes had gone out as if looking towards a lover whose soul had departed; however, what actually flashed through his mind were memories of a completely different time.

“So…… If there’s any way…….”

Sob, sob…… Only the sound of sobbing echoed through the vast space for a while. Even the holy power he poured out calmly subsided

―…Shall I give you a chance?

A chance, the parched lips murmured silently, voicing an unspoken question.

―A chance to turn back life.

“……Repeat the same.”

The lips that once insulted a lover, that sucked on her lips, br*asts, skin, and p*ssy, let out a dry laugh.

“Then, again. I live the same miserable life, becoming a fool who knows not a single one of his emotions. Being despised by Lionella just the same. Waiting for the day I’d bring down Lionella and Parma without even knowing why I was born with such power. Making the same mistakes. Inflicting pain on Lionella just the same. Losing her right before my eyes……?”

―Someone has to change. By remembering this.

“……”

―But. Human, that won’t be you.

“……What?”

Mishael’s eyes twisted. Although he didn’t listen with expectation, if someone needed to receive the punishment of remembering this terrible life, shouldn’t it be him?

―Just one thing. If there’s a reason you received Mother’s love. The size of the power you possess might be coincidental, but if there’s a reason you received it.

The reason, the question that had been boiling in his chest for days after losing Lionella. A small light entered Mishael’s eyes at the apostle’s words. The tears that welled up in his eyes finally cut across his cheeks.

―Your soul is born in this world and burns life only once. It’s the same for those who received the Mother’s love.

“The one with holy power……, is it?”

―Other souls are wanderers. Souls that continue an endless journey, blooming life as they wander from world to world before perishing.

Those without holy power…… For example, Lionella.

―To repeat life while remembering it, there’s no choice but to bring along and overlay memories from a past life. It means living three times, holding memories of life from the previous world and this world.

“So, I’m only allowed to live once, and I can’t……?”

―You have no choice but to completely start over, forgetting your current life.

So, if they want to change their relationship even a little, someone has to remember this wrong answer.

Isn’t it just pushing the responsibility onto Lionella?

You might not want to meet me again.

‘I love you too.’

……No. Could that be?

Yes. If you hated meeting me again, you wouldn’t have confessed your love, not even as a joke. Not having received even a warm glance from you, I lived my whole life thinking my self-pity for not being loved was resentment towards you……

So it’s just wishful thinking.

If we have a new opportunity. If we had started on the right track. Then……

Could we love properly?

Mishael’s gaze once again turned towards Lionella in front of him.

“Just…… I’d rather not remember in detail.”

Thinking about what he had done to have Lionella, he wished she wouldn’t remember those things. Not only because of his guilt but because it must have been painful enough for her to wish for death.

―Well. Let’s hope fervently. The loving Mother might listen. If your life starts over, you need to return to Mother’s embrace.

“……Right.”

―Maybe it’s not bad not to get involved at all. Considering your troubles.

“No.”

Mishael smiled, twisting the corners of his mouth in relief at finding his own solution, as the tears he suppressed filled his eyes and cut across his cheeks repeatedly. His marble sculpture-like cheeks became instantly soaked.

“I’ll never let her go. No matter how many times we meet again, I’ll definitely fall in love again.”

―……Is that what humans call love?

“Well…… What do I know about love.”

Yes. This must be a chronic disease instead. Because my heart got shackled by you, an incredibly hateful and lovely woman. Because I went blind to the light of you who stayed in this world by chance……

So even if this life repeats countless times, if I return to the embrace of the deity and am reborn without any memory time and time again, as long as you are Lionella Parma and I am your servant Mishael…… I will always only wish for you.

Could this also be love?

Will you tell me again that you love me?

When Mishael finally made up his mind and his face calmed down, a wheel floating behind him flew towards them and stopped in the middle. The Apostle didn’t explain further, but Mishael intuitively knew what he had to do.

A romance novel. The only thing she, who despised everything unnoble-like, was caught up in. So he hoped that her soul, intending to cross over to the next world after completing her life in this world, would come back and remember her recent life as a story unrelated to reality.

This is a poor-quality nightmare. Part of a third-rate novel her soul never experienced.

I hope she remembers it that way. And doesn’t hate me more than necessary.

I’ll love you again somehow, so I hope you will make our first steps a little different.

Mishael extended his hand. Through his hand flowed holy power, making the wheel Mishael presented glow brightly white.