I'm A Sucker For Extras - Chapter 54

Chapter 54

‘I wonder if she’s really angry’.
 
He recalled the events of the previous night, though he didn’t want to. It involuntarily played in his mind.
 
‘You are a piece of sh*t, Aidan.’
 
It was a contractual marriage, but…it was their first night together as a married couple.
 
‘And you’re tossing and turning in bed while your bride is sleeping on the couch!’
 
Superficially, it might have been the worst, but, in reality, there was a more significant issue.
 
Pushing her away, getting drunk, wanting her back, and then pushing her away again.
 
If he had explained the wedding night in advance, she would have understood. She would have agreed.
 
She didn’t know what to do, so he seduced her, then shoved her away.
 
She’d responded to him, heated up, then suddenly panicked, her eyes fluttering.
 
They feigned coldness, but they were hurt.
 
‘She didn’t reject me, but she doesn’t approach me, and she doesn’t back away when I do.’
 
‘Was my face and body really that attractive to her? She liked my face and body; hence, she was okay with it.’
 
It was the first time he heard such words… Until now, people tended to avoid him and his face. So Aidan had never really thought about or consciously acknowledged his own face.
 
Being the feared Northern Duke was enough for him.
 
And this body had grown to protect people, to subdue someone by force.
 
A body that was nothing more than a weapon. Just like a sword is sharpened and a cannon is oiled to prevent rust,. Like a good, useful object.
 
But she said she liked his body.
 
Every time her slender hands clung to his shoulders, he began to feel that his body had value.
 
Not as an object, but as a person.
 
In his heart, he wanted to reach out to her again.
 
To tease her, to hear her responses, to hold her, and then she comes to want him.
 
The tender sensation had made him want to turn away.
 
But now it was gone. It will fade more and more.
 
Because she has decided so.
 
He made up his mind that he shouldn’t reach out to her.
 
He had resolved to keep his distance, and it was what he intended. 
 
But his heart tightened with loss.
 
The fierce north wind was whipping at him, unaware of the cold.
 
Suddenly, he was worried about Brody.
 
The hustle and bustle of clearing away bowls quickly died down, and they sat in silence again.
 
Only the muffled chatter of soldiers in the distance intermittently pierced the thick night air.
 
When he turned, Brody was crouched over, staring into the campfire. Her pale face looked so cold.
 
Aidan hesitated.
 
If he wrapped her in his arms and covered her with a cloak, she would undoubtedly feel warmer.
 
But should he?
 
Brody shivered and leaned closer and closer to the fire.
 
But that would make her front too hot to stay there for long.
 
The warmth of the food was only temporary, and he couldn’t ward off the chill that kept creeping in.
 
Brody huddled in a circle, pulling her already well-worn fur coat open once more.
 
She was too cold to lie down, and it looked like she’d have to sit here and doze off for the rest of the night.
 
Well, she had slept on top of a running horse, but that’s about it.
 
Brody smiled, realizing that she was getting used to this world.
 
‘Even if you sleep sitting down… … It’s so cold… … .’
 
Maybe it’s because they’re northerners, or maybe it’s because they’re sturdy knights, but if they don’t get cold, they can’t understand what Brody is going through right now.
 
Brody bit her lip tightly, trying to steady her shaking body.
 
If she didn’t, her jaw would shake and Aidan would hear the clatter of her teeth.
 
‘I’m cold……, I’m cold…….’
 
She squeezed her eyes shut.
 
Her fading memory brought her back to that day in the warehouse.
 
‘I’m scared.’
 
‘I’m suffering.’
 
‘I want to live.’
 
‘Is this what I’ve worked so hard for?’
 
‘I haven’t done anything yet. I haven’t done anything for me.’
 
She was completely alone. And she don’t just mean locked away in a warehouse.
 
Her family expected and leaned on her, but they weren’t there for her.
 
Because she was always busy, she didn’t make any real friends.
 
‘If you hang in there, it’ll end someday,’ and that’s what she did, day in and day out.
 
She didn’t know it would end like this.
 
She flipped through the novel on her smartphone with cold, calloused hands.
 
‘It’s cold, and…… lonely.’
 
My blurry vision blurred, and water dripped onto the dimly lit screen.
 
“Brody.”
 
“……!”
 
Brody’s eyes fluttered open, and instead of a blue electronic glow, she stared at a bonfire blazing red in front of her.
 
Startled, she quickly pulled away.
 
Then she saw Aidan’s large hand holding her head where it had just been.
 
She must have dozed off and leaned forward, and Aidan had saved her from falling into the fire.
 
Her pale face and dilated pupils swayed unsteadily.
 
The cold was terrifying, but the fire was equally terrifying.
 
Brody shook her head as if trying to shake off a terrible memory.
 
Then she saw the concerned look on Aidan’s face, the one that had kept her from falling into the campfire, and the reality of what had just happened sunk in.
 
“Are you okay.”
 
“I’m fine……I’m fine, I just fell asleep, stop…….”
 
Brody blushed.
 
Just like that, Brody’s depressed mood had given way to embarrassment.
 
‘Why did I keep almost getting caught in the fire, and why did he keep catching me like that?’
 
‘No, I would have been roasted if I hadn’t been caught, but still…….’
 
Brody swept her hair back to cover the sides of her gaping face in an attempt to hide her embarrassment.
 
Aidan’s face hardened when he saw that. She didn’t look okay at all, but she kept saying that she was okay, which made him complain. He know he doesn’t deserve to think that way, but still… … If it looks this bad, is there a need to hide the condition so much?
 
Aidan’s brow furrowed even deeper as he asked, looking so scared.
 
“……Why don’t you come here?”
 
“…….”
 
Here? Brody glanced through her hair and realized what Aidan was saying.
 
Aidan made room in front of him.
 
‘Don’t give me that look. I don’t want to get down on my hands and knees.’
 
Brody glanced away again.
 
“It’s okay.”
 
“It’s dangerous, and you look cold.”
 
He was right.
 
There was a chance she’d fall asleep again and end up in the bonfire, and she wasn’t cold enough to go that far…….
 
If no one was around, she could just smoke a plant and tie herself up so I couldn’t fall forward.
 
She couldn’t do that now.
 
She felt a pang of resentment at her own helplessness.
 
When Brody raised an eyebrow at him without answering, Aidan made up his mind: since she seemed to be wavering, he would drive a wedge into her mind.
 
So he lowered his voice so that only Brody could hear him.
 
“Don’t feel burdened. Aren’t we in a contract relationship with each other? I’m saying this because it’s not good for me if the contractual wife gets sick or injured.”
 
“…….”
 
Brody wanted it to be a contractual relationship, and since he emphasized that, so it seemed like an appropriate persuasive statement.
 
But is it because of her mood? Brody’s expression seemed a little colder.
 
She said, “Ah……ha. Yeah……. I see.” and then smiled at him.
 
“That’s fine, too.”
 
“But……your body…….”
 
‘That damn body! body! It’s not like I’m freezing to death right now! If he really felt like I was going to die,I would have done something myself. All I have to do is survive tonight. Is he afraid I can’t even do that? It’s not like I’m a child, so why are you so anxious? ’
 
Aidan was worried about her; she knew that, but somehow that vague tenderness made it seem even more cruel, and she felt a surge of irritation.
 
“I said it’s okay!”
 
“…….”
 
She hadn’t shouted that loudly, but the silence of the northern winter night carried her voice far and wide.
 
Stirrings and intermittent shouts leaked from their respective barracks before settling back into silence.
 
Brody bit her lip hard, embarrassed by the emotions that hadn’t yet subsided and by the fact that she’d unknowingly caused a ruckus and bothered people.
 
She took a moment to process her emotions before she spoke.
 
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to…….”
 
But at that moment, Aidan suddenly got up from his seat without accepting her apology.
 
Brody watched in dismay as Aidan strode away.
 
“This is messed up.”
 
‘It’s a mess. I’m supposed to draw a line in the sand to make things work, and that’s all well and good, but I can’t let my emotions get the better of me and make a scene.’
 
She wonders what the knights would think, that this lady from the central kingdom is a goddess or something, and was causing a disturbance. She wonders if they’ll think that and make her feel uneasy.
 
Her head was spinning like that. The uneasiness of the princess and the intense cold seemed to conspire to break her heart in two.
 
Brody curled into a ball once more. She pulled the hood of her robe down tight.
 
She wasn’t going to cry, not ever.
 
She bit her lip hard, forcing the emotion down.
 
She’ll just do better in the future. She will make up for it. She has to do it anyway.
 
While she was thinking this, she suddenly heard a loud thud next to her.
 
Startled, Brody nearly cut a hole in her lip with her teeth. What was that?
 
A thump, thump, thump. There were several more of the same. It was coming from so close to Brody that she couldn’t help but look up.
 
‘What the…… is that?’
 
Brody’s eyes widened in disbelief.
 
A tree had suddenly sprouted in front of her.
 
‘A tree…… sprouting?’
 
Brody quickly assessed the situation.
 
That tree was not made by Brody.
 
Technically, the tree hadn’t “sprouted,” it had been “planted.”
 
Aidan had gone into the nearby woods, plucked out a tree of just the right size, and planted it next to her.
 
Aidan scratched the back of his neck as he stood there speechless, unable to say anything.
 
“Just lean over here and sleep. Mmm……. If you’re still nervous, you might want to tie yourself down, so you can sleep as close to the campfire as possible.”
 
“…….”
 
After saying that, he put down the water bag. When he filled it with boiling water again, it was radiating warmth again.
 
“Hold on to this, and if it gets cold, tell me, or, um……, or there’s a pot over there. If you don’t have enough water, you can scoop up some snow and boil it.”
 
Aidan explained quietly, but his eyes were shaking, contrary to his voice.
 
Although no one else knew, Brody astutely noticed his expression.
 
He was nervous that Brody might feel overwhelmed.
 
Brody bit her lip tightly again, this time to hold back tears, but for a different reason.
 
She was angry because he was sweet, and now she was sad because he was sweet.
 
Aidan became anxious when she didn’t get an answer, even though he searched for a reasonable solution: ‘What if this isn’t it? What should I do? ’
 
As they stood there, looking at each other expressionlessly, a crowd of people began to gather around them.
 
It was the knights.