“Why are you standing there like an idiot?”

Ethan shouted sharply as he bit into his sleeve and tore it off with his teeth.

“I’m not an idiot.

Came the grumpy retort, but Ethan quickly pulled out a knife. He pressed down hard on the wound with the piece of cloth to stop the bleeding, causing If to grimace.

“Ethan, this is uncomfortable.”

“Bear with it. We have to stop the bleeding.”

Normally it would have stopped easily, but this time – what the hell! The blood continued to pour out in waves, refusing to stop. The cloth was soon drenched in pink, like flower petals.

Now completely soaked, it could not absorb any more blood.

“Why? Is there a reason we have to stop this?”

“What?”

“Ethan, you’re hurt here.”

If lifted his free hand and gently stroked Ethan’s cheek. A scratch from a thrown knife – just a tiny drop of blood, hardly worth noticing.

And yet, to treat this small wound…

“…Ha, it’s nothing.”

Unbelievable. Seriously? You should know what’s worth comparing! All this just to treat a stupid scratch like that?!

“Oh, right. Ethan, you hate that sort of thing.”

Despite the angry outburst, the other remained as calm as ever.

Crack.

“Hey, you just stay here.” 

There was no way he could take her with him. Once again Ethan realised something about the Ancient. No matter how much he tried to teach her common sense, there was a huge gap between them – one that couldn’t be bridged, no matter how hard he tried. 

“Why?” 

If looked up at Ethan with clear, innocent eyes full of confusion. As Ethan let out a deep sigh, her wandering gaze slowly returned to rest on him.

“Do you hate my blood, Ethan?”

The answer she came up with was so absurd it left him speechless.

Ethan let out a dry laugh as he peeled the piece of cloth from her now healing skin.

“I hate to see you hurt.”

Her skin, which now looked as if it had been stained with pink paint, was smooth without a single puncture. The only sign of injury was the hole in her clothes.

“But this isn’t a real injury. It’s fake – made of the same material as your arm. What you call ‘blood’ is nothing more than a synthetic fluid.”

This is what it means to have a body that can’t feel pain. This woman can’t tell the difference between a person being hurt and a machine breaking down. She may understand it logically, but she’ll never understand it emotionally.

Well, it probably doesn’t make much difference to them. Even if their limbs were cut off, they could be reattached, and any illness could be cured – what’s a little injury compared to that?

“I guess it works, huh? When I’m gone, no one will nag you to wear clothes. You were mad at me anyway, weren’t you?”

If lifted her eyes at Ethan’s question. Her face was unusually stiff, unlike her usual self.

“You said you were bored, right?”

That last part.

If nodded at Ethan’s question. No need to deny it – that was all there was to say about her situation at the time.

She was bored. Restless. There was nothing that brought her joy.

So she took Ethan’s hand and followed him. It had been a long time since she had gone for a walk. And she was curious.

She could have stayed where she was and that would have been fine – but curiosity got the better of her.

The strange act of picking up broken bones and covering them with cloth when they were nothing but rubbish.

The certainty in his voice when he said, “If you come with me, I’ll show you something even more interesting.”

How could he make such a promise when it was impossible to see the future? She was curious if it was really going to happen.

From the beginning, and even now, If has never had any great ambitions to leave the city.

“You nag a lot. And if we go outside, you’ll probably nag even more – much more than you do now.”

Ethan said it deliberately, with a mischievous edge, as if to ask, “Are you still okay with this?”

It was a childish kind of teasing, like a child throwing a tantrum.

Well, Ethan had been nagging more than usual lately.

If’s green eyes slowly rolled down to the floor, openly avoiding his gaze – a clear attempt to avoid another lecture. Ethan let out a dry laugh at her obvious reaction.

He swept his eyes over the ground, now damp and heavy with rainwater.

Despite his insistence that they needed to hurry, Ethan couldn’t just walk past the bones strewn across the road.

Gathering all the broken bones, digging a hole and pouring them in was a long process.

And even then, worried that monsters might dig them up again, he dug so deep that his arms almost gave out.

It was fascinating to If – Ethan’s world, where he made a kind of grave and buried them just because they were of the same species.

Even now she couldn’t quite understand that act; it remained a lingering curiosity.

For If, ‘being the same species’ was all there was to humans. Not just her – that was the way people like her saw it.

Humans were supposed to be social animals, but that was an old saying. As far as If knew, humans had lived as individuals for a long time.

Come to think of it, she had never spent so much time with another human.

And why should she? When androids and artificial intelligence, far more useful than humans, were always at her side.

What was always closest to them were androids and AI.

Android robots with synthetic human skin looked more human than real humans, while genetically modified and reconstructed humans looked less and less human.

Perhaps our bodies are more like the beasts out there.

If rolled her eyes forward, staring ahead.

We have two legs because it makes walking easier, and ten fingers because it makes grasping things easier. The reason they still retained a human form was nothing more or less than practicality.

If society had demanded running as a necessity, they would probably have adapted to moving on all fours, like the animals.

She could imagine what she would look like if her body had taken on the form of an animal.

And yet she also thought of her current form.

Unlike a beast, her body had no poison in its veins, no sharp claws with which to tear.

Even her skin wasn’t as tough and armoured as theirs.

If tilted her head and asked,

“Am I in your way?”

She couldn’t lift heavy things like Ethan, nor could she cook delicious food.

When Ethan remained silent, unable to say a word, If asked again,

“Are you leaving me behind because you don’t need me?”

Broken or useless androids were discarded and thrown away.

Here, where there were so many humans, perhaps the same could happen to her.

“…who would throw you away.”

Ethan barely managed to get the words out, biting his lip hard.

How could she say such a thing with such a calm face?

“I don’t know.”

He had brought her along because she looked bored.

She had agreed and followed him.

But now, out of the blue, Ethan changed his mind.

People weren’t as fickle as she was – that much she had learned from watching Ethan.

Whatever Ethan did, there was always a reason.

So If looked for a reason, even now.

‘I’m not in the way. Then why are you leaving me behind?’
If kept tilting her head, over and over.

“……”

Ethan’s mouth fell open at the sight.

Until now, every answer he gave to her questions had to be logical.

For her, the emotion called worry was not logical.

No – perhaps it would be more accurate to say that she didn’t even know what worry felt like.

It wasn’t the first time he had shown her worry.

But not once had this worry ever reached her.

“If I’m a burden, it’s okay to leave me behind.”

She was curious about the outside world, but not enough to want to be a burden to Ethan.

If she really wanted to, she could always go out later.

If looked at Ethan with a calm, clear expression.

Seeing that, Ethan’s face twisted slightly.

He knew that if he said she was a burden, she wouldn’t follow him.

To her, he was someone she could easily give up on – that’s how little she clung to him.

“Do you want to come with me?”

If answered clearly,

“That’s why I came out.”

“There are so many people in the world. You would have followed anyone if they’d asked. It didn’t have to be me.”

Anyone but Ethan?

She couldn’t understand why he’d said that.

If frowned at the words that made no sense to her.

There was no need for “what ifs”.

The past could not be changed.

It was Ethan she had met, and it was his invitation that had brought her out.

What else was there to consider?

“I followed you because you’re Ethan.”

“You don’t even know who I am.”

“Ethan.”

She had heard that question before.

After a moment’s thought, If added another word.

“Randall?”

It wasn’t the same answer as the last time, but at least it was progress.

Seeing the proud look on her face, Ethan burst out laughing.

“Do you even know what a Randall is?”

“A human without magic.”

She replied immediately, as if she had pulled the definition out of a dictionary.

Ethan chuckled softly and ruffled her hair.

“Once we get out there, there’ll be more trouble than fun, you know.”

“Then… will I be bored?”

Because trouble usually meant things you didn’t want to do.

“Bored? Not a chance. You won’t even have time to be bored.”

“If that’s the case, then it’s all right.”

“There’ll be a lot of nagging too.”

“Hmm, I don’t like it, but I’ll try to endure it.”

“You’ll have to learn a lot.”

“Learning is fun, so that’s OK.”

“There will be even more things you won’t understand.

“Then you can explain them to me again, Ethan.”

“…”

“I want to stay by your side. Is that not okay?”

‘Ah… I give up.’

With a sigh, Ethan realised that there was no stopping this woman who was determined to follow him to the end.