Chapter 7 – Trauma (Part 4)

‘Is he lying because he doesn’t want to tell me?’

Ellerdin bit the soft flesh inside her mouth. He promised to tell the truth.

‘He could have just said my ability wasn’t enough.’

She couldn’t understand why he was saying such absurd things.

Everything seemed fine until just now, so what had made him resort to such a lie?

She should just agree, but she didn’t want to.

“…You said you wouldn’t lie.”

Ellerdin glared at Fernan with tear-stained eyes. Tears dripped from her large, trembling eyes.

Fernan, startled by her unexpected reaction, leaned in closer.

“It’s true. Please believe me. If you don’t, I can show you.”

“Then show me.”

Ellerdin hiccupped, trying to hold back her tears.

“R-right now?”

Fernan stammered in surprise.

Ellerdin looked at him with clear eyes, as if she hadn’t spoken recklessly.

Fernan, momentarily flustered, took a deep breath.

“I can’t show you everything… but maybe this will clear up your misunderstanding?”

Fernan cautiously clasped his hands together and opened them.

Black scales slowly emerged from the peach-colored palm.

“……”

Ellerdin’s eyes widened.

She stared at Fernan’s hand, forgetting to breathe.

His pinkish nails transformed into sharp, long beast claws, and his hand grew to more than twice its usual size.

At that moment, a single black feather fell to the floor.

Ellerdin unconsciously picked up the feather. However, just like the scene she had seen long ago, the feather crumbled and disappeared as soon as it touched her hand.

“It’s true…”

Ellerdin’s voice trembled. It wasn’t because she was afraid of seeing the demon’s form.

She was in such shock that she couldn’t even care about that.

‘Why… has the future changed?’

Before her regression, Ellerdin had heard rumors that Fernan’s curse had been broken.

‘Could it be that my actions changed the future?’

Did my actions make his curse real and turn him into a demon?

If so, what should I do?

‘Fernan saved me from that hell. I want to make him happy. If Fernan is truly a demon…’

He’s such a kind person. Such a gentle person, yet he has to live his life feared by others.

As her thoughts reached this point, the tears that had stopped began to flow again.

“Sniff, I’m sorry.”

At Ellerdin’s apology, Fernan’s face turned harsh in an instant.

He gripped Ellerdin’s wrist tightly and asked in a slightly angry tone.

“Why are you sorry? Are you afraid now that you know my true identity? But as I said earlier, you can never escape now.”

His voice trembled slightly at the end. When he looked up, he saw her anxious face.

Realizing there was some misunderstanding, Ellerdin hugged him tightly.

“What are you saying? I don’t care if you’re a demon or whatever. I’m just… it feels like it’s because of me… that you have to live avoiding others…”

“What are you talking about?”

Fernan frowned.

However, Ellerdin, seemingly not hearing his words, tightened her arms around him and sniffled softly.

Sensing there was a misunderstanding, Fernan gently pulled Ellerdin away by her shoulders.

He spoke seriously, looking into her eyes.

“Why do you say it’s because of you? I know how the rumors about me are in the capital. I admit I didn’t try to resolve them. But I live here not because I’m hurt by others’ reactions, but because I don’t find them worth dealing with.”

Hearing his circumstances for the first time, Ellerdin’s eyes widened.

But she believed Fernan’s words were true.

However, she no longer wanted to distinguish what was a problem and what was true.

A tired Ellerdin leaned her head against Fernan’s chest. The blood that had been flowing from her arm had already stopped.

Fernan took out a potion and poured it over her wound. The blood disappeared, and the wound healed instantly.

Sensing the situation had settled, Fernan carefully picked Ellerdin up.

He laid her on the bed and began to massage her legs.

Her legs were a bit stiff from sitting on the floor for so long.

‘I should say I’m okay.’

Ellerdin blinked her reddened eyes.

The potion Fernan used had a drowsy effect, so Ellerdin unknowingly kept closing and opening her eyes.

Maybe because the tension had eased, she felt like all the strength had left her body.

Her throat felt dry and itchy, as if dust had settled in it. As she coughed lightly, Fernan handed her a glass of water.

“Cough, thank you.”

After taking a sip of water, Ellerdin exhaled slowly.

Her body, which had lost a lot of blood, began to show signs of fatigue as it worked to recover.

Ellerdin struggled to keep her eyelids from closing.

Seeing this, Fernan smiled and leaned in, pressing his cheek to the back of her hand.

“Ellerdin, please don’t do anything reckless like this again. You don’t have to do anything for me. Just stay by my side. I’ve…” 

become so fond of you.

Fernan murmured as he kissed the back of Ellerdin’s hand.

His voice was so low and muffled that it was hard to hear.

Ellerdin wiggled her hand, asking him to say it again, but Fernan only smiled meaningfully.

He stood up and brushed the redness from her eyes.

“Let’s talk about the rest tomorrow. Sleep well.”

Ellerdin, with her eyes closed, rubbed her cheek against his long fingers. Beyond her blinking vision, she saw the brightly shining stars above the greenhouse.

***

As the dawn air settled, Ellerdin woke up with a start. She was surprised to find herself groaning from fatigue. Once the sleepiness faded, she felt a warm body heat next to her, something she often felt before.

Turning her head, she saw a familiar bundle of fur wrapped around her.

‘…He’s been protecting me all this time….’

Realizing who Fer was, Ellerdin bit her lip. She was grateful to him for silently watching over her.

Tears welled up again.

At the sound of her small sobs, Fer puffed up his fur and pulled Ellerdin closer. She liked how he was attentive to even the slightest reactions.

‘What do I do… I really like this person.’

Ellerdin tried to suppress her growing emotions.

It wasn’t because she was leaving this place like before, but because she was hesitating whether she should start this feeling or not.

She didn’t know how to handle the emotion of love that had sprouted for the first time.

Facing her emotions properly made everything suddenly feel unfamiliar. Every part of her that touched him felt hot.

Normally, she would pet Fer’s fur without a second thought, but now that she recognized Fer as Fernan, she couldn’t do anything.

‘What should I do?’

It felt like her insides were filled with butterflies, making it hard to breathe.

Ellerdin, at a loss, fidgeted with her fingers.

Meanwhile, Fernan, who had woken up when Ellerdin sobbed, was pretending to be asleep in embarrassment.

He had opened his eyes slightly out of concern for her condition, but upon seeing Ellerdin, he instinctively closed them again.

‘Why is she suddenly blushing?’

He didn’t know what was going on, but he knew getting up now would be foolish, so Fernan maintained his pretense of sleep.

‘She seems fine, but in case she’s uncomfortable, I should move away a bit.’

Fernan pretended to toss and turn, subtly moving away from her.

‘She should be okay now, right?’

Fernan peeked to check Ellerdin’s reaction.

‘…?’

Contrary to his expectation that she would be relieved, Ellerdin was biting her lip as if she was upset.

‘Why, why is she like that?’

Fernan closed his eyes tightly. He couldn’t fathom why she would be upset.

Could it be the aftereffects of a nightmare?

‘Damn it, how could I not notice that? Stupid fool!’

Fernan cursed himself, gritting his teeth.

Meanwhile, Ellerdin was staring blankly at Fer’s fur, missing the warmth that had momentarily disappeared. She disliked this empty air.

‘Would he dislike it if I got closer?’

He must have slept uncomfortably while holding me all the time. So, this is right.

‘I know that in my head….’

But being apart from him brought a wave of sadness.

She hadn’t expected that acknowledging love would make her feel like a child all of a sudden.

Even though she tried to soothe her heart, the sadness didn’t easily go away. On the contrary, the more she thought about it, the more she wanted to cling to him.

‘Fernan doesn’t wake up easily once he falls asleep….’

Ellerdin cautiously moved towards Fernan.

Testing the waters, she approached, but Fernan didn’t move, as if he was deeply asleep.

‘Thank goodness.’

Ellerdin smiled brightly.

‘I can be greedy just this once.’

Then she hugged Fer’s fluffy fur tightly.

Her small figure nestled into his fur.

‘What…!’

Fernan gritted his teeth to stay still.

He hadn’t expected her to approach him first. Deep inside, joy overflowed.

Unaware of Fernan’s situation, Ellerdin was convinced he was asleep.

As he didn’t wake up easily, her actions became bolder.

Ellerdin climbed up towards Fer’s neck and spread her arms to hug his nape.

Her small embrace was filled with the large beast.

“Hehe.”

A small laugh of happiness melted into the dawn air.

‘Ugh…!’

Fernan’s hand trembled involuntarily.

Her loveliness made his heart feel like it would burst.

What should I do with this person?

He wanted to pour all his feelings into this small figure right away.

He wanted to hold her, kiss her, and shower her with love.

‘But… I shouldn’t do that.’

It would surprise her. Fernan slowly exhaled, suppressing his desire.

Meanwhile, Ellerdin, satisfied with Fer’s warmth, quickly fell back asleep.

Unlike her, Fernan had to endure the sleepless night.

It was the longest dawn in the world.