My Former Lover Didn't Die And Came Back - Chapter 23
He recalled the day he arrived at Cavendish Mansion. The first task given to him after the ceasefire was to guard the mansion’s main gate, or more precisely, to monitor his superior’s former lover. She was even a married woman.
…Is he insane?
His evaluation of his superior involuntarily became severe. Come to think of it, there was a nickname that had followed him for three years. The Mad Dog of the Battlefield. He wasn’t an animal, so the first part was incorrect, but the adjective was accurate. And seeing him falsely accuse her husband of crimes he didn’t commit and lock him up behind bars made it clear that he was indeed mad.
The punishment for his former lover who wore her shoes on the wrong feet1‘고무신 거꾸로 신다’ in Korean means leaving a man you were dating to meet someone else. It is used when a woman starts dating another man after breaking up with her boyfriend who joined the military during his absence was excessive. The fact that she abandoned him meant that there was clearly something lacking in Cedric that made him unfit as a husband.
If the rumors about Cedric were true, if he really was of common birth as rumored, then that would be a problem. The blonde beauty his superior had him watch over was naturally born with aristocratic mannerisms in her gait and speech.
After all, this was a world where a woman’s looks and a man’s economic power were an equivalent exchange. In Theodore’s eyes, Blair possessed such beauty that even if she married the wealthiest man in the Eleanor Empire, she wouldn’t be unworthy. He had never seen such beauty in his life.
Is it such a big mistake for women of marriageable age to seek a better husband? The changes in men when they meet women who are younger and prettier than their current partners are such a cliché that it wasn’t even funny.
His punishment for his former lover was excessive. That was Theodore’s conclusion.
His superior always visited the Cavendish Mansion late at night. It was obvious what he was up to with his former lover in the closed mansion. After staying overnight, she would always come out to the courtyard to wash the bed sheets and blankets.
Perhaps Theodore shared the same thoughts as everyone guarding the mansion.
…Why treat a beloved woman like this? Since idle soldiers enjoy gossiping about others, they all said that their superior was tormenting her because he harbored intense hatred toward Blair.
But in Theodore’s eyes… it wasn’t hatred but rather…
The distance from Cedric’s office to Cavendish Mansion was quite far. If his purpose was to relieve his sexual desires, he could have called for courtesans at his townhouse. If not, Cedric often received attention from many women at imperial banquets.
Cedric had plenty of work between his training, the banquets at the palace, and cleaning up after the war. And it seemed like the emperor used the handsome Cedric as a promotional tool to gather military forces for various events.
Despite all this, he visited the Cavendish Mansion almost every night. He truly had insane dog-like stamina and vigor.
His superior made sure they never entered the mansion. He even instructed them not to peek inside, no matter what sounds came from inside. In Theodore’s view, it was an act of possessiveness.
His superior didn’t assign maids to her, but he ordered them to bring the best meat, vegetables, and fruits. When the weather got colder, he told them to throw well-dried firewood through the crack in the door, and when it snowed, he ordered them to repair the windows and roof.
On sunny days, she would take walks in the garden. She had lost a lot of weight since he first saw her. Even though she was the prettiest woman of her age, her expression resembled that of an old woman. It was the face of someone who had given up.
Theodore knew what kind of women made such faces. It was the expression he had seen on women’s faces in back alley brothels. There was no way his superior wouldn’t know what he knew.
He doesn’t know what kind of past they had between them. But what Theodore knew was that his superior was pouring oil on his legs and setting them on fire himself. It was clear now that he couldn’t stop his own mad movements, gripping the torch.
It left a bad taste in his mouth. With only a few things to learn and no help for career advancement, guarding the mansion was mostly done by former mercenaries.
He had been thinking that it would be better to return to his territory like his friends did. But strangely, he couldn’t leave the odd job of wandering around the mansion.
* * *
Inside the most popular restaurant in the Eleanor Empire that Ian, Cedric’s subordinate, had reserved, only gentle classical melodies flowed without any special noise. The man and woman sitting face-to-face at the table said nothing.
…He seems unnecessarily capable.
Cedric thought of his secretary as he applied pressure to the knife cutting the meat. Elena’s voice was heard.
“…I heard it’s very difficult to make a reservation here these days, but as I heard, it’s really delicious.”
Elena said with a smile on her face. With her brown hair tied up and decorated with purple flowers, she was bright and beautiful today as well.
“…Please enjoy your meal, my lady.”
“…”
The blushing Elena, feeling awkward, cut the already sliced meat into smaller pieces with the cutlery clenched in her hands.
No matter how much of a soldier he was, the man in front of her was too silent even without words. …That aspect was admirable as well.
The Empire’s hero, Cedric Fitzgerald.
He was the figure who led the victory in the war against Litunia. Carrying the vast wealth and territory of the Fitzgerald family, along with the trust of the Emperor, he was said to have formed an unusual relationship with the Crown Prince while serving in the military.
Elena realized that she was weak when it came to men’s faces after seeing this man. Their meeting was arranged by the Emperor and her father.
It all started when the Crown Prince greeted her in the palace garden. Some maids who saw them strolling in the palace garden deliberately slowed their steps to spread rumors. After that, all she did was smile gently without saying a word in response to the questions thrown by maids at banquets or tea parties.
The rumors spread rapidly as if they had wings. Elena realized that people were always curious about who would be the marriage partner of the Empire’s hero.
When Elena stared intently, Cedric looked up. Her breath caught at the sight of his sculpted face.
Feeling her gaze, Cedric briefly raised his head and focused on cutting the meat without saying anything.
The veal meat here was definitely delicious. The tender texture and flavorful sauce were excellent. To achieve this taste, it would require not only good ingredients but also the skill of a seasoned chef.
His taste suddenly turned sour as she thought of a woman who had been trapped in the mansion for months, eating only food she had made herself. What she had in her mouth turned into rubber.
…Where did things go wrong?
He had been avoiding Blair’s mansion for ten days. His last memory was wrapping her hand in bandages. The injury on her hand should be fine. His first aid skills were proficient, and the wound was not severe enough that with a few days of good food and rest, it would heal.
However, strangely, he couldn’t go to the mansion after that day. For some reason, his feet wouldn’t move. When he tried to get on the carriage, his footsteps stopped, but he couldn’t figure out the exact reason.
“Thank you for today, Lord Fitzgerald.”
“…”
After Elena finished her meal, Cedric escorted her to where she could board the carriage. It was a dinner party that was hard to refuse with both parents and Her Majesty present.
When he reached out his hand to help Elena board the carriage, the scent of lilacs wafted from her body as she leaned closer. He suddenly realized how splendidly dressed she was. And he thought of a woman who had been wearing the same nightgowns for months without a maid to help her dress up.
He remembered how he responded to her desperate request to hire a maid. A chuckle escaped him.
Clatter clatter. The carriage carrying the woman disappeared from sight.
Elena. A name given to the brightest girl, meaning a torch placed on a sail. Among the women in Eleanor who worshiped the sea and martial arts, it was the best name one could have.
Elena was the daughter of the highest-ranking ducal family in the Empire. In Eleanor, a place without a princess, she would likely be among the top five women in existence.
Today she wore a white dress clearly made by an expert, and she was beautiful.
But why did his thoughts of a woman, who resembled golden wheat fields, keep coming to mind? It was beyond him.
* * *
Blair opened her eyes to the chilly air of the mansion touching her cheeks, and approached the window with trembling legs. She checked if there were any partially open windows, and tightly closed an additional window. Even as she stood by the window, she could feel the cold, and outside the fogged-up windowpane, white snowflakes were fluttering. The bitter cold had arrived.
She moved her lump-like body back to bed and looked at her bandaged hands. She could fear a tingling pain, but she didn’t care. Her overly empty stomach let out a scream of pain, but her appetite didn’t return at all. She sat on the bed and drowned in a sea of thoughts.
…I wonder if what supported me so far has been ‘my innocence’.
The past few months had been painful for her, but not unbearable. Perhaps there was some hope deep down in her heart. If he ever found out about her innocence, maybe Cedric would return to his former self. What had kept her going so far was her belief that she was innocent.
That’s why she imagined that the worst reaction she could receive would be something like, ‘So what will change? You’re still your parents’ daughter. You’re the daughter of the perpetrator, and that wouldn’t change.’
…The reality she faced was even worse than she had imagined.
…She didn’t know that he wouldn’t believe her words.
She recalled their first reunion. Seeing the maids’ bodies covered in blood initially scared her into lying because she was afraid that he might do the same to her parents.
「…It’s all my fault. Everything is my doing.」
She felt that she needed to calm his anger for now. She also had a careless thought that perhaps he might kill his old lover.
‘Why did I have hopes for him?’
After all, there was no way he could still have trust left in her… It was contradictory to expect him to have something she herself didn’t have.
After their reunion, he initially treated her cruelly, but as time passed, he gradually softened. The time they spent together increased, and they had dinner together. Why did she have such expectations of him?
The reason is simple. Having expectations is akin to having feelings.
Even when she had mostly given up hope for his survival after three years of separation, even when they met again in the blood-soaked mansion, and even when he threw bills at her while in a fit of anger, she couldn’t completely let go of him.
To receive such treatment yet still be unable to let go, there was no woman in the world as foolish as her.
Translator
-
ianthe
should probably stop picking up new novels. i'll try.
- 1‘고무신 거꾸로 신다’ in Korean means leaving a man you were dating to meet someone else. It is used when a woman starts dating another man after breaking up with her boyfriend who joined the military