Chapter 8 – Bad Girl (Part 2)

“How can you leave me like this?”

“…….”

“Junhee, how can I stand being with Sim Hye-joo while you’re like this?”

“Move.”

She pushed him away and got up. She tried to leave the room, but he grabbed her wrist and sat her down. Junhee, seated in front of Dowook, had a very angry face.

Dowook realized he had made a mistake. His desire to confirm that Junhee’s heart was still with him had ruined things. He quickly changed his approach.

“Should I kneel and beg?”

“Just move.”

“Should I stick my head in the yard and endure for days until your anger subsides?”

“Go back to Seoul. I don’t want to see you.”

She hit and pushed his chest. He accepted all her punches.

“Where would I go when you’re here?”

Still, Junhee’s anger didn’t subside. She kept feeling more and more angry. Just a few minutes ago, her body was calm as if dead, but now her heart was pounding unpleasantly.

You said you loved me. You said you waited for me. After mixing your body with mine so wildly and intensely. After hugging me so tenderly. What? A woman touched your thigh?

She couldn’t hold back the irrational anger and sadness. Bad thoughts kept coming. While Junhee was spending time alone in Nonsan, Dowook was hanging out with lowlifes, drinking and meeting women. He always kept his distance from women. He never let anyone touch his body carelessly.

And then he comes to her. Hugs her desperately as if there’s no one else but her. Makes an anxious and tender face. After playing with other women…. She was furious. She hated him. She glared at Dowook sharply.

“Other than that, there was nothing. I swear. She’s a woman who will soon be imprisoned with Choi Seonwook. You know that. I’m only for you.”

“Just go and get engaged to Sim Hye-joo and marry her.”

“Jealousy is cute, but be careful with your words.”

“What right do you have to be annoyed when you couldn’t even take care of your body properly outside?”

Her attempt to hit his chest this time was caught by Dowook. He seemed to be getting angry too.

“Yes, it was my fault, but you’re wrong too for constantly bringing up Sim Hye-joo and pissing me off.”

“Didn’t you think it was over between us and that’s why you acted recklessly? Fine, it’s over. So do as you please. I won’t care. Go and do whatever you want.”

“There’s a limit to how much I can tolerate, Woo Junhee.”

“I only said it. You’re the one who actually let someone else touch your thigh. If that’s a mistake, you’re mistake is bigger.”

At that moment, Dowook’s eyebrows shot up. His black eyes flashed red.

“Ah, so the punishment for that mistake is to hand me over to Sim Hye-joo? What a kind and innovative punishment, Woo Junhee. But can you really send me to Sim Hye-joo? You’ve been bringing up her name since last month, constantly pissing me off. Are you sure you can do that?”

“Why not? The director and your grandfather all want it. Go and be as kind to her as you were to me. They’ll all be happy.”

Anyway, no one at Heejeongwon welcomes me. 

Despite spending so much time and trying so hard to be recognized, Junhee couldn’t have what others took in an instant.

Thinking about it made her heart ache. She didn’t want to feel this pain. She wanted to stop now. She wanted to stop this tiresome argument and find peace. She wanted to be calm. She wanted to go back to before Dowook came to Nonsan. Rather than having her heart burn like this, it would be better to bury herself in the blanket and sink into loneliness and helplessness.

But Dowook didn’t stop.

“Be kind, and then what?”

He smiled. He continued his cruel questions in a kind voice.

“Should I have s*x too? Have children and get married, would that be okay?”

The moment Dowook reminded her of the existence of a child, Junhee felt horrible. 

If I have a child, will that child be treated like me at Heejeongwon? 

The thought crossed her mind. 

Will the child be hated because it’s mine, and receive the same contemptuous looks and words I did?

She lowered her gaze. She saw the stained blanket on the yellow linoleum floor. She grabbed the blanket for no reason. It was the blanket she had laid on since she was a child, one she couldn’t even remember. She remembered her father patting her to sleep on that blanket when she was young.

Neither Junhee nor her child should be subjected to such disdain just because they are with Choi Dowook.

Her mind was set. She raised her head again.

“Yes. Do that. Meet the woman your family wants without wasting your energy trying to fit with me. Have children and get married.”

Dowook burst into laughter. He turned his head and looked at the empty wall, repeatedly letting out a laugh of disbelief.

He let go of Junhee’s wrist. The way he brushed off her hand was cold. Suddenly, Dowook’s face turned fierce, and his sharp eyes pierced Junhee like a spear. A long silence ensued. Their angry breaths echoed loudly.

His piercing eyes were burning hot, but Junhee did not back down. She knew that Dowook’s anger reached from head to toe. Yet, she wasn’t afraid of him. She knew from long experience that no matter how angry he was, he wouldn’t treat her carelessly.

In the end, it was Dowook who frowned in distress. He turned his head and ruffled his hair roughly. He let out a long, low sigh and looked at Junhee again. He dialed someone while staring at her.

“Yes, Ms. Sim Hye-joo. It’s been a while. I think it’s time to make an appointment.”

His repeated words pierced her dazed mind. Soon, she realized what kind of call he was making.

Haha.

Junhee lowered her eyes and laughed. Her insides churned. She looked up at him again. Dowook also didn’t take his eyes off her.

“Well, we can meet at a nearby hotel, or if you have a preferred place, let me know. Anything is fine.”

Dowook’s soft-spoken manner to another woman felt strange.

Junhee endured it steadfastly. She could have lowered her gaze and avoided him, but she didn’t. Her eyes kept slipping downward, from his dark eyes to his saliva-slicked lips, and further down to his thick neck. She forcibly pulled her gaze back up.

If this was how it was going to end, it was something she had to endure anyway. While enduring, Junhee imagined. Dowook eating with, drinking coffee with, holding hands with, marrying, and having children with a woman who wasn’t her. Walking around Heejeongwon with a woman that the people of Taesan Group and Song Yeong-joo would be pleased with.

Bitterness seeped out from within. She stubbornly gathered her resolve with pride and spite.

Dowook continued the mundane conversation nonchalantly.

“What are you doing now? Did you have dinner? If so, what did you eat, and what are you doing tomorrow?”

He even laughed lowly while talking.

“Just because someone asked me to be kind. I thought I’d try being kind from now on. I apologize for my rudeness back then. From now on—”

“……”

“From now on.”

Dowook’s words slowed down.

“From now on.”

Suddenly, his lips stiffened coldly. He scowled fiercely for a moment and threw his phone on the floor. With a thud, something shattered from the phone. Dowook grabbed Junhee’s shoulder.

“Why aren’t you stopping me?”

His eyes glared fiercely at Junhee.

“You should stop me, Woo Junhee. Your boyfriend is doing something disgusting right now. So get mad and stop me like before, instead of just staring at me with that face.”

“…What kind of face did I make?”

“Like you’re about to cry. Like you’re forcing yourself to endure it.”

“You’re mistaken.”

“Mistaken?”

“Yes, mistaken.”

“No, it can’t be. I know you.”

Dowook smirked. That arrogant smile oddly grated on her nerves. The face and tone that acted like he knew everything. Dowook closed the distance further. Junhee spoke calmly.

“I won’t stop you. I won’t. So do whatever you want. Let other women touch your thigh, have meals with Sim Hye-joo, go to hotels. Do whatever you want.”

Dowook’s jawline tensed as if he was clenching his teeth. His eyebrows rose as if he was about to explode with something pent-up. His face showed he could no longer hold back his rising anger. Only then did Junhee feel a bit tense for pushing him so far.

Dowook gritted his teeth. “You started this,” he began, then spat out a curse. “You,” he said shortly, cursing again. He eventually stopped talking. His expression showed he was suppressing his anger, again and again.

An eternity of silence settled.

“You abandoned me again.”

The words Dowook finally uttered were like that. His black eyes wavered subtly, as if wounded.

Junhee also clenched her teeth. Her eyelids felt hot. A sudden rush of tears heated her chest.

Still… still, you shouldn’t do that. Even if I abandon you, you should keep waiting for me, keep embracing me. 

At the sudden surge of her own feelings, Junhee lowered her head. Shamelessly, she realized that was her true feeling.