Please Divorce Me Villain, I’ll Raise the Child Alone - Chapter 132

“I don’t want to hear that from someone who tried to run away as soon as their memories returned.”

Raphael really seemed to think she was trying to run away. Her feelings were certain, but she still didn’t fully understand his emotions.

“Why don’t you want to let me go?”

“……”

Even though he knew her true identity, he kept silent. When did he realize she was Evelyn? Leonel was the only one who had memories when they returned to the past. This meant that Raphael had figured out on his own this time that Amelia was Evelyn.

“Do you still need a Grand Duchess in name only?”

What Raphael wanted from Amelia was just the title of Grand Duchess. As soon as he found her, who resembled Evelyn, he approached her immediately with an absurd marriage proposal that was advantageous to her.

“Or is it because you realized I’m your first love, Evelyn, and you can’t let me go?”

If that was the case, it would explain his changed attitude. Raphael had changed at some point. Before regaining her memories, she was engulfed in despair and betrayal. It meant that he ultimately loved Evelyn. Even now, after regaining her memories, she didn’t feel entirely good about it.

No, she felt rather anxious. Having been revived, had her memories erased, and turned back time once more, she was no longer the original Evelyn. To be precise, she was Evelyn but not Evelyn. In other words, she was not the Evelyn he wanted.

“I’m… not Evelyn. I have the memories of Evelyn, but I’m no longer called Evelyn. I’m different from your childhood puppy love.”

Surely, what he longed for was the complete Evelyn. Amelia bit her lip in anxiety.

“I know.”

“…Why did you hide it?”

Even though he missed Evelyn so much. She still remembered vividly the smile and gaze he had when thinking of Evelyn.

“You already knew, didn’t you? That I’m Evelyn.”

What if he didn’t want her? Her feelings had become more certain than anyone else’s. She would cling to him even if he abandoned her.

But it was useless if he didn’t want it. Of course, she had no intention of backing down immediately. He had just said he wouldn’t let her go either…. It was the worst. In the end, she only intended to stay by his side until the end.

“To be precise, I found out later. Do you really think I married you knowing you were Evelyn from the beginning?”

“Even if it wasn’t that at first, you must have realized it not long after.”

How did she appear to him? The former Evelyn? Or a completely different person? Even with two sets of memories flooding in, her feelings for him hadn’t changed. Because Raphael was Raphael. But it might not be the same for him. No, it was definitely not the same. Even now, he couldn’t look her in the eyes properly.

“I realized it not long ago. I was sure when you attended the Founding Festival banquet.”

“You had suspicions before that, didn’t you?”

“Yes, that’s right.”

Since when? Right after Leonel turned back time?

“To be honest, I suspected from the beginning. Even though I couldn’t remember Evelyn’s face, seeing you, Amelia, reminded me of Evelyn. But at the same time, I thought it couldn’t be.”

Even though her feelings wouldn’t change regardless of his, she couldn’t hide her anxiety.

“But strangely, I felt a sense of rejection. As if someone was obstructing me. But at some point, that feeling disappeared.”

“When Leonel turned back time……”

So it was the goddess’s power that prevented him from recognizing her? This time, with the restrictions lifted, he realized it?

“And I had already found out once in the past. After you died, Amelia.”

***

After she died?

“After I died, Your Grace……”

He ran amok and died. That was the only way Siegfried could die. The memories after her death were all conveyed through Leonel.

“There’s a loophole in the goddess’s curse. If a certain existence is present, it can offset it.”

She didn’t understand what he meant by offsetting. As Raphael approached closer, Amelia was flustered. The heat emanating from his body made it hard to think straight. His massive frame seemed like it would engulf her at any moment.

“Do you know that Siegfried suffers because of the goddess’s curse? You probably don’t know to what extent.”

“R-Roughly……”

“We feel excruciating pain as if our bones are breaking, along with headaches from the surging power. We can’t feel anything except for the urge to kill. It’s the same with consuming food.”

Did that mean he couldn’t taste food? But both Leonel and Raphael ate without issue. Leonel especially enjoyed desserts. It was impossible not to taste if that were the case.

“Leonel can taste food.”

“The symptoms worsen as you become an adult. In Leonel’s case, he seems to have avoided it because he can use the goddess’s power and he’s still young.”

That’s why Raphael didn’t eat often. He couldn’t taste it anyway.

“Ironically, the goddess’s final curse saved us. To be hated by the only one who can free you from suffering.”

That was the last part of the curse.

“That created a loophole. Siegfried has only one mate. Meeting that person removes all pain, allowing them to live like a normal person.”

As his body pressed closer, Amelia stepped back.

“To Siegfried, that person is salvation and the only one they must hold on no matter what.”

“How do you know that?”

“I can’t help but know. It’s instinct. And that person always has an irresistible sweet scent.”

A scent? She was already completely within his reach. She was trapped in Raphael’s embrace.

“And that scent started emanating from you at some point. It overflowed when the block was lifted.”

He remembered saying that she had a scent.

“You were mine from the beginning. I was foolish not to recognize it because of the goddess’s trickery.”

“S-stop….”

“I almost made the same mistake this time. Do you know what happened to me after you died?”

She couldn’t escape even if she wanted to. If she moved even slightly, their lips might touch. Feeling his breath on her face, Amelia wanted to close her eyes.

“I realized everything. What I had missed.”

So it wasn’t that he liked her, but that he needed her? Because she was his mate?

“And then I realized I was doing the same thing as the past me.”

“What…?”

“I was missing the chance to hold onto you again.”

It was somewhat disheartening to learn that the reason Raphael, who had no memories, held onto her and was obsessed with her was this. She thought it might be a feeling similar to love… Maybe it was better that he was holding onto her out of his old feelings for Evelyn.

“So, you need me. That’s why I mustn’t leave….”

Frustrated? No, that word couldn’t explain this feeling. What should she do now? She couldn’t leave him. Should she stay by his side, feeling relieved that he needed her, even if he didn’t love her?

“You said you weren’t Evelyn. That doesn’t matter. I’m not the Raphael you knew either. Since the moment I regained my memories, I’ve been a completely different person.”

She was helplessly pulled towards him by the hand that grabbed her chin. Something flickered deep in his amber eyes, resembling gold.

“I don’t care if you hate me.”

“Stop….”

“I gave up on being loved from the beginning anyway.”

Gave up on being loved? Wait, this man’s words were strange. It seemed he didn’t think she liked him from the start. He was convinced it was impossible.

“Many Siegfrieds have done that. They longed for love and held on forcibly.”

“Wait, wait a moment.”

He was saying he would forcibly hold onto her as well.

“I tried to give you a chance. But you still tried to leave me.”

She wasn’t trying to leave. She had only left the castle to call him out. Of course, from Raphael’s perspective, it could be misunderstood….

“You don’t love me either!”

“What do you mean…?”

He pretended not to know, even though he had just said it himself.

“You said you’re keeping me by your side because you need me!”

The biggest problem was that she didn’t dislike him even in this situation.

“Amelia, of course you hate me….”

Amelia tightly closed her eyes and pulled his face to kiss him. It was better to shut up those lips that kept saying irritating things.