Chapter 10 –  The Master of the North (Part 6)

“Hurry, where do I go?”

Once he finished shaving, he stood and urged Knox.

Following the guidance, they soon arrived in front of a room where Ennie was the first to be seen standing outside. Normally, she would have been waiting inside, so Knox, feeling puzzled, raised an eyebrow and called Ennie. Only then did Ennie notice the two of them, and she was about to greet them lightly when she saw the Crown Prince and quickly bowed deeply.

“Why are you outside?”

At Knox’s question, Ennie began speaking in a calm tone, though her tightly clasped hands trembled slightly from surprise.

“Miss has been very tired due to not being able to sleep properly, so I was burning the herbs the Young Master gave to help her sleep.”

“Since when?”

“For quite some time now. I think she might wake up soon as the herbs are almost burned out.”

Knox turned to Cherta.

“What will you do? Will you see her after she wakes up?”

“No. I want to be by her side while she sleeps.”

The answer came without a moment’s hesitation. It was a natural decision for him, who had always ensured Ria never woke up alone. Seeing Knox nod, Ennie stepped aside from the door. Cherta opened the door and entered before Ennie could even reach for it.

Despite his hurried steps toward the door, his hand on the doorknob was careful enough not to make a sound.

Inside, a subtle herbal scent greeted him first. His gaze fixed solely on the bed from the moment he entered, he cut through the air mixed with the herbal scent and approached the bed. As he reached the bed, he naturally lowered himself, kneeling on the floor.

She had grown thinner. Her skin was paler, and her breathing sounded fainter than before. Suppressing the emotions that threatened to overwhelm him, Cherta reached out toward her face.

But it took quite a while for his hand to touch her skin. His hand kept trembling, and he repeatedly clenched and unclenched his fist, trying hard to stop the shaking.

Finally, when he touched her, the emotions he had barely held back burst forth uncontrollably. Afraid of waking her, he bowed his head and bit his lip hard. The metallic taste of blood lingered on his tongue, and tears mingled with the blood seeping from his lips.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being incompetent, for saying I’d protect you and failing to do so.”

There was only one thing he wanted to say, one thing he had to say. 

I’m sorry. I’m sorry for making you like this. 

Clutching the hand that had touched her face, he cried for a long time. He swallowed the sobs, fearing they might disturb her hard-won sleep.

He cried for a long time like that. Suddenly, he heard a moaning sound above his head.

“-Uh.”

Though it was a very small sound, Cherta’s head immediately snapped up. Seeing her frown in distress, his heart sank.

“…No, uh, no.”

“…Ria.”

“Don’t come, no, I’m scared….”

Her already small figure curled up even more. Tears poured out, soaking the pillow. Seeing her body trembling visibly even under the blanket, his body reacted before his mind.

He roughly wiped the tears from his face and climbed onto the bed, sitting down and pulling Ria into his arms. He hugged her and stroked her back.

“Ria, it’s okay, it’s okay now.”

“Let go, no, don’t come….”

But Ria struggled, trying to break free from him. The impact of that day, which remained a terrible nightmare, wouldn’t easily let her go. Yet Cherta held her tighter, continuing to soothe her.

“Ria, it’s okay. No one can hurt you anymore. I’ll make sure of it, okay?”

“Hic, sob.”

“I’m here. I’m right here, so it’s okay now. It’s okay.”

He held her tightly, enduring her struggles, and did not let go. Perhaps understanding his intention, Ria’s breathing gradually steadied, and her struggles subsided.

Eventually, her sobs quieted, and she lifted her tear-soaked lashes. As soon as she opened her eyes, the familiar scent at the tip of her nose made it hard to distinguish whether it was a dream or reality. She wondered if she was seeing them in her dreams because she yearned for them so much.

“Ria….”

But the choked voice she soon heard and the hand stroking her back confirmed it wasn’t a dream.

“…Cherta.”

Cherta, who hadn’t realized she was awake, flinched and lowered his head at the sound of her calling him. Ria, who had slightly pulled away from his embrace, also lifted her head to look at him. Finally, their gazes met.

A trembling white hand cupped his cheek. As the soft touch met his cheek, now damp again, hot liquid flowed from his golden eyes once more.

“Cherta.”

“Yes. Yes, Ria.”

Responding to the voice that seemed to confirm his presence, Cherta barely managed to open his blocked throat and answer. As he closed his eyes, the sensation of tears flowing was vividly felt. As was the warmth touching his cheek.

“Ria, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

“….”

“I’m sorry for not protecting you, for not finding you sooner, for only coming now. I’m sorry for making you feel this pain again.”

Resting his face against her hand, he repeatedly murmured apologies. The temperature against his cheek was warmer than usual, whether because he had cried or because her frail body was feverish, he couldn’t tell.

He only knew that the touch of her other hand, wiping his eyes, was something he had desperately missed.

Ria smiled faintly as her thumb became damp with his tears, then slowly caressed his cheek, which had become dry and rough since she last saw him.

“…It’s okay because you came before it was too late.”

“….”

“Yes. So I’m okay.”

A wave of relief washed over him. The painful days, from the moment he confirmed him, from the moment he felt his warmth, gradually faded. So she was truly becoming okay.

But Cherta’s face twisted at her words, which seemed to reassure him instead. He hugged her tightly, burying his face in her shoulder, and pleaded.

“How can it be okay? How! Why didn’t I protect you, why did I come so late, you should be… angry….”

“….”

“It’s okay to be. Don’t just say you’re okay, let out all the emotions you’ve built up.”

Knowing that Ria, fearing being alone here, had repeatedly told herself she was okay, as if hypnotizing herself, always pained him. It tore at his heart.

“No matter what, my feelings for you won’t change. I won’t let you go!”

So please, let it out. Don’t be afraid. Don’t worry about such things even at a moment like this. 

Cherta held Ria tighter, giving her the assurance that would dispel her fears. It became a catalyst, breaking open the tightly wrapped edges of her heart.

Her brows gradually furrowed. Her eyes crinkled, and tears welled up beneath her lids. The emotions she had suppressed burst through the gaps, escaping without hesitation.

“…Why, why did you come now? You promised to protect me every time. I… I only have you. You made me believe that, so why….”

“I’m sorry. It’s my fault.”

“Sob, I was so scared. I thought I was going to die, I was scared because I didn’t know what would happen.”

“Yes. It’s my fault. I should have found you sooner, I’m sorry.”

“I held on, thinking you were coming to save me, that you were coming….”

“It was too late, wasn’t it? I’m sorry.”

Cherta responded to every word that spilled out without missing a single one, apologizing. Saying it was all his fault. That he was sorry. Ria, hearing the gentle apologies in her ear, cried and let out the emotions she had tightly pressed down.

After a long while, as the continuous stream of words faded and her sobs quieted, Cherta gently pulled back and softly wiped the tears streaked on Ria’s cheeks with his thumb. Ria closed her eyes, focusing on the tender touch, then placed her arms on his shoulders, pulling him toward her. Their foreheads touched, and their breaths mingled.

Having released her pent-up emotions, she felt somewhat relieved. Ria added in a voice still tinged with tears.

“If you can’t protect me again, I’ll be angry….”

“Yes. As much as you want.”

“I’ll cry and hit you.”

“That too, as much as you want.”

“And I’ll leave you.”

“…That can’t happen.”

The sensation of his frowning forehead was vividly conveyed, and a small laugh escaped Ria’s lips. It was the first laugh that had emerged since facing him again.

“So you have to keep your promise.”

“I won’t let anything like that happen again. …I’m sorry.”

Ria nodded slightly and pressed her lips to his. As the movement of his lips lightly captured hers, the gradually spreading sense of relief completely took over her body.

Now, I’ve returned to your side again.