Chapter 12 – Part 4

Kristin no longer met Raphael’s gaze as he looked at her.

She began to walk forward, and as she tried to move beside him to avoid a puddle, their hands gradually brushed against each other.

As their hands kept colliding due to the puddles in front of them, Kristin was startled and placed her hand over her heart, stopping in her tracks to say to him,

“Please go ahead. I will follow behind.”

“Why?”

Raphael knew the reason but pretended otherwise, asking again.

“Why? Are there too many puddles? If it’s that troublesome, we can return to the estate.”

“It’s not that.”

“I know you’re uncomfortable being with me. Still, I hope we can keep our voices down in a place where we can remember our mothers.”

At his words, Kristin nodded.

In this place filled with happy memories, she didn’t want to argue with him. That was why she had changed her attitude toward him.

She thought there was nothing sadder than growing to dislike a place filled with good memories.

“I understand, Your Grace.”

Kristin looked at him, focusing on his upper body.

Walking around Lake Matejo in just a shirt seemed too much, with the cold wind blowing.

Although the sun shone above, it was quite chilly. So, Kristin took off the jacket she had draped over her shoulders and offered it to him.

“It’s getting quite chilly. It’s October now. You might catch a cold in this cool weather.”

Although Kristin offered, Raphael didn’t take the jacket. Instead, he looked at her intently and asked,

“Are you worried about me?”

“Excuse me?”

“You dislike me, so whether I catch a cold or not shouldn’t concern you. Don’t think that I can’t handle this kind of weather.”

Despite his words, Kristin couldn’t help but worry.

But she reminded herself that Raphael wouldn’t genuinely care for her.

If he had been capable of such care, he wouldn’t have treated her so coldly in their past lives.

She didn’t understand why he couldn’t let go of her, but she understood his feelings to some extent.

She was satisfied that she was no longer seen as an easy target.

She no longer needed to seek his love by embroidering for him, cooking, decorating his study with flowers, or buying him uniform shirts.

“Alright then.”

Kristin responded briefly.

As they resumed walking, Raphael followed her slowly.

After a few minutes had passed, as they rounded half the lake, something caught their eye.

There stood a large maple tree, firmly rooted near the lakeshore.

The leaves had turned red and brown with the autumn colors, and beneath the tree, a thick carpet of colorful leaves lay.

As soon as they saw the maple tree, Kristin and Raphael spoke at the same time.

“Do you see that tree?”

“That tree.”

Their eyes met as they spoke in unison.

* * *

Kristin ran towards the maple tree.

It was as if she forgot she was wearing a dress with a full skirt. She lifted her skirt and ran like a child, prompting Raphael to follow her, saying,

“If you run like that, you might fall. And those aren’t even your shoes. You could get hurt.”

But his words didn’t reach her ears.

Seeing this maple tree, memories flooded back.

As a child, she visited Lake Matejo several times a year.

Each time, this tree welcomed her with its beautiful autumn leaves.

Under the maple tree, bathed in the autumn sunlight, Kristin used to lay her head on her mother’s lap, feeling the clear sky and cool breeze as she drifted off to sleep.

What she remembered most vividly was her mother’s voice. Always warm and kind. She could never forget that voice.

As Kristin looked at the bench and was about to sit down, Raphael grabbed her wrist and spoke up.

“Wait, just a moment.”

He took a handkerchief from the pocket of her jacket and laid it on the bench for her to sit on.

Seeing this, Kristin asked,

“Oh, you had a handkerchief all along. Why didn’t you use it earlier?”

Raphael responded slowly, seeing her confused expression.

“Because this handkerchief was meant for you. It wasn’t for me to use if I got hurt.”

“But still.”

“It’s fine. And don’t just sit down on the bench without checking. It might be dirty.”

After saying this, Raphael turned to the attendants and guards standing behind them.

“I want to be alone with Kristin. Return to the carriage. There’s no need for guards right now. I doubt anyone here poses a threat.”

“Guarding is always necessary, Your Grace.”

One of the guards spoke up, but Raphael shook his head.

Recalling Kristin’s earlier advice to be kind to the servants, he forced a smile and addressed them.”It’s alright. This won’t take long. Go and wait by the carriage.”

After finishing his words, the Duke smiled at them, causing the surprised knights and attendants to step back.

One of the attendants quickly responded.

“Understood. We’ll keep an eye out for any suspicious individuals around the lakeshore.”

“Good.”

Raphael waved them off, and they quickly turned and walked back towards the carriage.

Seeing this, Kristin spoke to him.

“But we’ll have to go back soon anyway. I don’t think we need to be alone like this. Why did you do it?”

She asked him, and Raphael tilted his head back to look at the maple leaves above. Seeing the leaves reflected in his eyes, Kristin turned to look at the maple tree behind them as well.

“I wanted to be alone in front of this tree. My mother passed away when I was ten. Until she died, she loved coming here with me, but I didn’t particularly enjoy coming to Lake Matejo.”

“You don’t like such a beautiful place?”

“Yes. On cold days, my mother was often unwell. Every time she coughed while watching me play and collect maple leaves, I felt burdened by the situation. Even when I was having a good time, I sometimes resented her for coughing. I didn’t want to hear that sound.”

So when Raphael heard from his attendants that Kristin was ill, a deep annoyance surged within him. Hearing about illness was something he was all too familiar with from childhood, and it grated on him.

He thought he wouldn’t bat an eye if Kristin died, but when he heard about her accident, something heavy dropped in his heart.

It felt like throwing a heavy stone into a still pond, and he never wanted to feel that again.

Raphael vowed as he looked at Kristin.

‘I must prevent Kristin’s death at all costs. At first, I wanted to keep her close to avoid my death, but now it’s different. Just being close isn’t enough.’

He had to find a way to continually increase the time he spent with Kristin. He believed that their deaths were linked, and he needed to be by her side. He had died in the same place where Kristin had died.

After his untimely death, Raphael felt emotions he had never experienced before. He thought death would never come easily to him.

Having feared nothing, he had often expressed anger over the small mistakes of the servants in the Duke’s residence and had spoken cruelly.

Such behavior from the Duke had not spared his wife, Kristin.

No, perhaps Kristin was also a trash can for him to vent his emotions. That’s why he treated her so harshly during their short year together.

He deeply regretted it.

As Kristin had loved him, he had come to love her too, making his regret even more profound.

But he didn’t want to dwell on that regret any longer, so he spoke to her.”Could you tell me more about the happy memories you had here?”

“I, I…”

Kristin, who had been listening to Raphael, looked into his dark eyes and hesitated before answering.

“I rode a boat here, and we spread a big blanket under this maple tree to eat sandwiches. My mother was a noblewoman, but she was very down-to-earth, so she didn’t mind sitting on the ground in a dress. One day, we came here on a summer day…”

At that moment, Kristin felt something for the first time.

When she spoke to Raphael, she had never felt that he would listen to her like this before.

Whenever she talked to him, it felt like she was conversing with a wall, but now Raphael was looking into Kristin’s eyes and listening to her.

However, Kristin thought of this as a mere illusion.

She believed he was being kinder because they were in a place he liked.

“One summer day?” the Duke asked, prompting Kristin to continue hurriedly.

“We played games fanning each other and practiced dancing here for the debutante ball. I often practiced waltzing with my mother, but she said my posture was terrible and I still had a long way to go with holding hands and my shoulders. Even as a child, I couldn’t understand the point of noble parties. I thought they were a waste of time.”

“A waste of time?”

Raphael pondered Kristin’s words, which he had often thought about while observing the social activities of other nobles. Having felt the same way, Raphael couldn’t help but laugh when he heard Kristin’s words.

“Haha, that’s quite an amusing statement. I’ve thought that way for a long time too.”

“Really?”