She had mustered courage to speak in front of the knights, but the response she received was rejection.

When Diana heard Edwin’s firm answer, given without any hesitation, her cheeks flushed red. Embarrassment washed over her belatedly.

He was a knight of the Winchester family, so treating Diana respectfully was only natural. She realized she had been foolish to think she had captured his heart.

She had harbored arrogant thoughts without realizing it. Since many men tried to win her favor, she thought Edwin would also open his heart to her if he had such impure intentions.

Diana was the only daughter of the Duke Winchester, and any man who married her could inherit the Winchester duchy, so it was natural for them to be greedy.

But Edwin was different. He remained faithful to his role rather than his desires.

Well, Sir Edwin was that kind of man.

Diana disliked men who flattered her and wore fake smiles. Yet she had hoped Edwin would harbor such feelings…

She didn’t like people who looked down on others for their humble origins or discriminated based on social status. She had grown sick of people who acted hypocritically toward her.

‘From now on, if you bother Edwin, I’ll consider it bothering me! Besides, if I find out anyone is being bullied within the knight order, I won’t stand for it.’

Hadn’t she helped Edwin, who was of commoner origin, when he was being harassed by knights from lower noble families?

The sight of those knights who flattered her while bullying Edwin disgusted her, so she had thrown warning words at them. Yet now Diana’s behavior was no different from theirs.

She had come to like Edwin precisely because his attitude was completely different from theirs, yet she was thinking contradictory thoughts. Fool, idiot…

Forcing feelings wouldn’t make them appear, so what exactly had she been trying to do?

Feeling ashamed, Diana avoided Edwin after that. Whenever she caught sight of him from afar, she hid herself. She simply couldn’t face him.

Not long after, she heard news that Edwin would transfer to the Imperial Knights with her father’s recommendation. Well, someone with his exceptional skills wouldn’t remain just a ducal knight forever.

Though it was understandable, what should she do with her lost heart? Diana was confused about how to sort out her feelings.

Should she give up since she was rejected? No, was there really a need to do that? Even if he became an imperial knight, was there a law saying she couldn’t like him?

Though Diana had been avoiding Edwin, she had no intention of giving up her feelings. Not being able to see that handsome face would be her loss.

Shouldn’t she at least say goodbye before he left for the imperial palace?

Regardless of being rejected, Diana needed to thank Edwin for all the help he had given her. If she let him leave like this, she felt she wouldn’t be able to sleep at night from regret.

Thinking she could meet him at the training grounds, she headed there, but when she heard a conversation from afar, she hastily hid herself.

Edwin was talking with the knights, and it seemed like a conversation Diana shouldn’t overhear.

“Don’t focus only on your sword.”

“The sword is my entire life.”

“Don’t you have a woman you fancy? A man should carry pure love in his heart.”

Diana was certain Edwin had no woman he fancied. Not because he had rejected her. He usually showed no interest in women, and most of the women he met were people from the Winchester estate.

But that was Diana’s misconception.

“There is someone I admire.”

When she heard the unexpected words, she felt like her breath was cut off.

So that’s why he rejected her proposal.

She could have accepted it if the reason had been that he couldn’t become her personal knight because he had to join the Imperial Knights. But it wasn’t that. He had someone else in his heart. So this was what it felt like to have the sky fall down.

“Really? Who is it? Do I know her?”

“I cannot tell you that much. The other party doesn’t know my feelings anyway.”

Though greatly shocked, Diana found herself thinking of maids around Edwin’s age. Since they would have much contact with the knights, it was probably one of them.

‘Ella maybe? Wait, Susan is around the same age too. Come to think of it, didn’t I see him talking with Emily?’

There were quite a few women she could think of, so Diana couldn’t guess who Edwin fancied. Who could it be?

“Is she a noble?”

“It’s not like that.”

“What? It seems like she is though?”

“Please don’t ask any more.”

This was the first time Diana had seen Edwin looking embarrassed. Seeing him like that made her wonder if she really needed to find out who Edwin’s unrequited love was.

What would she gain from knowing except more jealousy? Feeling miserable, she tried to suppress her gloomy mood, but it wasn’t easy.

Diana ultimately couldn’t say goodbye to Edwin and had to watch him leave the Winchester estate through her bedroom window.

This all happened during their immature teenage years. After being rejected by Edwin, Diana buried her feelings and lived modestly and virtuously according to her education, showing the image of a refined lady.

After that, she heard news that Edwin had risen through the ranks to become a knight captain, but their connection ended there.

After becoming knight captain, it was difficult to see Edwin’s face unless she went to the imperial palace. She encountered him much later at a banquet hosted by the imperial family.

As knight captain, he was guarding His Majesty the Emperor by his side, and when she met him after so long, he had become an even more wonderful man.

She kept glancing at him, and when their eyes met, Diana looked away. She was so nervous she couldn’t even exchange greetings.

Though she had been rejected long ago, she still harbored lingering feelings, so she unconsciously acted that way. Yet she still hoped. She hoped Edwin would propose to her.

Even knowing it was a hope close to delusion, Diana desperately wished Edwin would become her husband. She didn’t know how much she agonized then.

But that was truly nothing but vain hope. He never proposed to Diana, and her father never recommended him as a marriage candidate.

In the end, Edwin never sent Diana so much as a letter, let alone a proposal.

Even though her expectations hadn’t been high, her disappointment was great, so Diana had no choice but to give up her feelings. She couldn’t live holding onto those feelings forever.

That’s why even though she still admired Edwin afterward, Diana readily accepted marriage with Clive. She was simply trying to hide her feelings, fearing she might be rejected by Edwin once again.

She thought marriage would help her forget. But looking at the results, she neither forgot Edwin nor avoided a miserable end.

It was truly the worst.

Putting aside the past that only brought wounds when remembered, Diana’s gaze turned to Edwin once again. Even when she tried not to look in his direction, her eyes kept drifting toward him unconsciously.

Meeting him after so long made Diana feel like she was confirming her feelings once more.

Moreover, the more she recalled memories with him, the more her feelings for Edwin bubbled up and overflowed. To the point where she couldn’t contain these feelings.

Would it be wrong to choose Sir Lauderdale?

Though he might have been a commoner before, he now held a baronet title and had the trust of both the Emperor and Crown Prince. Besides, she knew he was on good terms with her father. With Edwin’s upright and honest character, he wouldn’t betray her like Clive would.

She felt she could trust Edwin with her family. She knew well that he wasn’t the type of man who would harm her parents to seize the Winchester family.

Hadn’t she watched him from close by since childhood? If he had been power-hungry, he would have accepted Diana’s confession. Then he would have moved according to his desires.

What was the reality? Didn’t they become distant after she was rejected?

From any perspective, there was no better marriage candidate than Edwin. Looking at conditions alone, she wondered why her father hadn’t considered Edwin as a potential groom in the past. How could such a fine man be excluded from marriage candidates?

“But what’s the point? I was already rejected…”

In this life, she still wanted to marry the man she loved. But Diana couldn’t bring herself to covet him in this life either. What meaning would there be in marrying a man who had no feelings for her?

‘No. Wasn’t that in the past? He might think differently of me now. I was young then, but now I’m an adult.’

She wanted to be greedy. Would that be okay?

Come to think of it, Diana didn’t need to find a man to actually marry right now. She wanted to become the family head herself, and wasn’t she currently looking for marriage candidates who would satisfy her father?

‘If I recommend Sir Lauderdale, father might acknowledge my judgment.’

Even knowing it would be troublesome for him, Diana wanted to choose Edwin as her marriage candidate.

She knew well that it wouldn’t lead to an actual engagement. The future wouldn’t change easily. So for now, the best strategy would be to present a decent man to her father and show that she had good judgment in men.

Diana’s biggest goal wasn’t choosing a husband, but avoiding engagement with Clive.