Chapter 25

He saw straight through all of Rabiana’s worries.

“Truly?”

“Isn’t it cruel to bother someone who just woke up?”

His voice was so gentle it could lull someone to sleep. As her body relaxed, her startled heart gradually settled back into place.

It wasn’t that she disliked sleeping with Alberto.

But each time drained her so much that she hoped it wouldn’t happen too often.

Besides, sharing a bed with someone—something she’d never experienced before—was such an intimate act that it still made her cheeks burn.

She didn’t know where to start. She’d resolved to stay quiet, but the words refused to stay inside.

“Your Grace. Let’s just… stick to the duties of husband and wife.”

The hand stroking her belly came to a sudden stop.

“This… this kind of thing isn’t really necessary for that, so please don’t… don’t do it anymore…”

Alberto went so still it was as if he’d stopped breathing, and Rabiana was on edge.

Would he be offended and lash out? Would he scoff and mock her? She braced herself.

“Do you dislike it?”

“…It’s not that, but… I just don’t think we need to be closer than necessary…”

In truth, Rabiana knew.

She knew she should accept it when Alberto treated her kindly.

She knew that pleasing the duke of the estate would make her life here easier.

But some sharp, unplaceable feeling inside her kept turning toward him.

She wished he wouldn’t be kind to her.

If he was going to speak like a venomous snake, if he was going to treat her like she was worth no more than that, then she’d rather he just stayed cruel.

This back and forth—

It felt like he was toying with her.

“Why are you being so contrary?”

Alberto narrowed his eyes and poked her cheek.

It tickled somehow, and she scratched the spot where his finger had touched.

“Would you rather lie with a block of wood, My Lady?”

“…What?”

“Would you prefer I just hold you without saying a word, like a log?”

Rabiana chose silence. Alberto felt faintly offended when no answer came—strangely so.

It wasn’t something to be offended about; if Rabiana had answered “Yes,” he would have acted accordingly.

Yet when she stayed quiet, a frustrating pressure rose inside him, and he wanted to hurry her into a reply.

“…I don’t mind.”

“…”

“So please, if possible, keep some boundaries…”

“Boundaries.”

Alberto was taken aback. No one had ever drawn a line with him. He was popular with women, and they were always eager to close the distance. Rabiana was the first to leave him alone.

What nerve was this?

She had nothing, and once she bore a child she would have to leave the castle—wouldn’t it be wiser to treat him kindly and secure what she wanted?

So different from ordinary women, Rabiana grated on his nerves. Why did she insist on standing out like a jagged stone?

“You should draw that boundary with Lawrence Carter, not your husband.”

“Lawrence…?”

Hearing a name she could hardly believe, Rabiana replayed their conversation. Lawrence hadn’t come up at all.

“Giving a married woman a necklace—he seems almost like a lover.”

“…That’s not what he is.”

“He’d better not be.”

A flicker of displeasure crossed Rabiana’s face. She hated hearing Lawrence spoken of that way. He was her benefactor—the only one who had stayed by her side.

Alberto becoming her husband changed nothing. Rabiana wasn’t cold-hearted enough to abandon family in an instant, and she would never tolerate Lawrence—who had cared for her blindness—being treated as an illicit lover.

“Lawrence is family.”

“Is there blood between you?”

“…”

There wasn’t. He was a distant relation—so far removed they might never have met otherwise—but the Selden family, short on kin, had cherished even those distant branches.

Their parents had been close, and they had grown up together.

“Even if there’s no blood between us, no one can deny that we’re family. I grew up with Lawrence like a brother. He took me in.”

“Who’s to say he doesn’t harbor ulterior motives?”

“He’s kind. So foolishly kind he’s spent his life looking after me instead of living his own. It’s ridiculous—just a childhood bond, yet he’s never once turned his back on me. Always stayed by my side. Caring for someone with a disability for that long isn’t easy.”

The words left her breathless.

But still, Rabiana wanted Alberto to understand, even just a little, what kind of person Lawrence was.

Alberto, who had been listening silently, let out a dry laugh.

“Sounds like fanaticism.”

“…”

“You trust that man that much?”

The question pierced something deep inside her.

She told herself she was fine, but the truth was, she couldn’t be unaffected by the fact that Lawrence had married her off to an older man.

It might be ungrateful, but Rabiana was disappointed in him.

A faint sense of betrayal lingered.

She kept telling herself he must have had his reasons—must have—but somewhere inside, a trace of resentment had taken root.

That was why she had to respond.

Because she loved Lawrence as family, as a friend—and because she believed he loved her the same.

Because she was not someone to be used by others and discarded.

“Yes. I trust Lawrence.”

“…”

“Why do you speak so harshly about him, Your Grace? You don’t even know him. You don’t know how devoted he is to family. If you got to know him, I’m sure your opinion would change.”

“Are you trying to convince me?”

“…”

Alberto scoffed at her words.

To him, Lawrence was already nothing more than a scoundrel who gave jewelry to another man’s wife.

No matter what Rabiana said, he couldn’t help but sneer.

The look in Lawrence’s eyes when he’d seen him—that arrogant, defiant glare—still lingered in his memory.

“I regret to inform you, but I didn’t ask about him out of some petty emotion like jealousy.”

“…”

“I don’t care what story you two have, or what feelings may have existed between you. I just don’t want rumors of an affair spreading in the North.”

Of course he would say that.

He was a man who cared deeply about how he was perceived.

Even the child not yet born—

Because he was a man who always calculated the risk of getting hurt.

“That’s why I need to know what’s between you two.”

“…”

“So that I can stop it, if necessary.”

With Alberto, the answer always had to fit the conclusion he’d already made. Rabiana couldn’t say a word.

She didn’t understand why he saw them that way.

What was so wrong about giving a necklace to family?

Though she couldn’t guess Lawrence’s exact intention in gifting jewelry to a blind woman, Rabiana suddenly found herself wondering—why had Alberto given her a necklace? Why go so far as to clasp it around her neck himself?

She didn’t think it was jealousy. It was just… she couldn’t understand his logic.

“Lawrence really is family. He’s known me since I was learning to walk.

After he took me in, he stopped going to social gatherings entirely and stayed by my side. In some ways, he’s even closer to me than my parents were.”

“What else?”

That was all.

Rabiana went quiet for a moment before speaking again.

“I have a question for you, Your Grace.”

“What is it?”

“Why did you give me the necklace?”

She felt that if she could understand Alberto’s reasoning, maybe she could also understand Lawrence’s.

The two were different men, but they were still both men.

“If it wasn’t out of some petty emotion like jealousy…”

“I know. I know it was payment.”

When Alberto had bought the necklace, he hadn’t yet known Lawrence had given her one.

Even if it was meant as pressure or compensation for bearing a child, there had been other ways to do it.

Rabiana didn’t want to waste words. She cut him off before he could say more.

Alberto’s mouth twisted slightly, as if displeased, but she didn’t notice.

He answered evenly.

“Because women like that sort of thing.”

“…”

“Necklaces, rings, diamonds, jewels—do any women dislike valuable things?”

It was such a simplistic way of thinking, she felt deflated.

But Rabiana couldn’t relate.

She had no interest in jewelry, and she didn’t bother adorning herself with decorations she couldn’t even see.

Even after marrying him, she accepted only the minimal adornment required to uphold her dignity as a duchess. Her attire was plain.

Yet Alberto’s choice to lump her together with ordinary women proved he had no real interest in Rabiana herself. Was Lawrence the same?

“I don’t particularly like it.”

Even as she spoke, Rabiana couldn’t understand why she’d said it. Would this man care about her personal preferences?

“I don’t even know what the necklace looks like. No one in the world likes something they can’t see.”