Chapter 7

The man, who would usually make efficient use of his time—whether by reading, studying, reviewing documents, or maintaining his sword—was taciturn. He was asleep, leaning back on the sofa.

Even as she approached, there was no sign of him waking. Waving her hand in front of his face yielded no reaction. Mel stared intently at his sleeping face.

His face, as beautiful as always, looked surprisingly youthful. It reminded her that he was around her age—a young man who had only recently come of age.

Just as she felt an odd sense of guilt and was about to turn her head away, his usually cheerful face twisted into a frown. His brow furrowed, his eyelids twitched, and he broke out in a cold sweat.

“Is he having a nightmare? Should I wake him up?”

Her heart pounded uncontrollably. Placing a hand over her chest, Mel repeated to herself, I am Bleria Heaven, three times as if to summon her courage. With careful resolve, she placed her hand on his shoulder and gently shook him.

When she softly called his name, his eyelids slowly opened. His unfocused eyes looked paler than usual, giving her a peculiar feeling.

“Has it been 30 minutes already?” he asked groggily.

“Oh, for once, I’m on time,” she replied.

“Ah…”

Sitting upright, Gopher rubbed his weary face with his hands.

“Sorry, I didn’t get much sleep and just closed my eyes for a moment.”

“Did you have a nightmare?“ Mel asked.

“Not really… What day is it today?”

He asked but muttered the answer to himself under his breath.

Then, indifferently, he reached out for his now-cold tea and drank it. Watching his Adam’s apple bob as he swallowed, Mel instinctively turned her head away.

“The tea must be cold. Should I get a fresh pot?“ she offered.

“I don’t like hot things. Sunlight, fireplaces, freshly boiled tea, blazing flames…“

“Still drowsy?“ she asked.

“Today is the anniversary of my parents’ death,“ he said matter-of-factly.

Ah.

Stretching his arms upward, Gopher continued, “Most of the Allnight family died back then. Aside from my grandmother, it’s just me and my cousin who survived. The annex burned down completely; unfortunately, all the servants were trapped inside at the time.“

“...“

“I figured it’s something you’d discover eventually, so I thought I’d tell you now. But don’t tiptoe around it. I’m not particularly bothered by the memory, and forced sympathy is just… irritating. If everyone I meet acts that way, it gets… tiresome, you know?”

He smiled lazily, but his voice felt sharper than usual.

Was irritation all Gopher truly felt? Right now, he seemed less annoyed by the inconvenience and more… something else.

‘Don’t jump to conclusions,’ Mel reminded herself.

She diverted her probing gaze from him, thinking instead about the two people who abandoned her long ago. She thought of Norma.

Though she didn’t even know whether her biological parents were alive, if someone had forced her to mourn their deaths, she would have spat in their faces.

“I almost got burned to death myself, so I don’t like hot things. But I’m not sad about losing my family. Is that strange?“

“No, there are all kinds of families in this world,“ she replied hesitantly.

Gopher paused, then smiled faintly. “Thanks for understanding.”

She didn’t love those who had abandoned and abused her. The magic tied to the word “parent” wasn’t all that powerful for everyone. Gopher might feel the same way.

Mel clenched her trembling hands tightly. Then, a much larger hand covered hers. Surprised, she looked up at Gopher.

“What do you think will happen to us?”

Bleria. His voice swam smoothly into her ears, impossible to avoid. The sound seeped into her chest, touching her heart.

“You know now, don’t you? Marriage is inevitable. If it’s not me, someone else will fill the role. If you reject me, the one by your side will only be someone worse.“

“...”

“Honestly, I don’t understand. You seem to want love, yet you’ve grown fond of me. So why are you so adamant about stopping this?”

Her chest thudded, but she couldn’t discern if it was from confusion, fear, or something else. The sensation of where Gopher’s hand touched hers was overwhelming.

“Do you really dislike me?”

No.

Mel bit her tongue hard. She might have answered that way if her tension had eased even slightly.

“Do you still wish to break off the engagement?”

She couldn’t answer this time, though the reason was different now.

‘If I break it off, we won’t meet anymore, will we?’

The only reason Gopher visited Heaven was because of the engagement talks. If, as he said, she had grown attached to him, Mel hesitated.

For the first time, she had grown close to someone her age. She wished they could meet more often and share more conversations. She dared to think such thoughts as if she were an equal to a noble.

At that moment, Gopher’s hand, resting over hers, moved as if to coax a response. His fingers slipped between hers, brushing against the tender skin inside.

The soft texture of his glove ensnared her, like being caught in a spider’s web.

Spider’s web—yes, a web. The faint white strands drifting into her vision reminded her that she was already in another trap.

A fleeting impulse cannot outweigh one’s life. Mel lowered her gaze.

“Yes, that’s what I want,“ she said, steadying her voice before repeating herself.

“I want to break off the engagement. Will you do it?“

“No.”

The response was cold and final.

When Mel met his gaze again, the charming, almost seductive expression he had worn earlier had vanished. His face was stark and unembellished, painfully cold. A sharp pang struck her chest, but simultaneously, she felt a sense of relief.

“You will never hear me suggest breaking off the engagement,“ Gopher said firmly as he stood.

Mel didn’t stand but followed his movements with her eyes.

Just when she thought he would leave without hesitation, he bent down to meet her at eye level.

“You once asked me how to act more like a noble. Let me give you one more piece of advice,“ he whispered, locking eyes with her.

“Don’t look away when you speak, you liar.”

And with that, he left, leaving Mel rooted in place.

‘Why even ask me if you already knew I didn’t want to break it off?’

Mel covered her face with both hands. Her skin felt unnaturally warm to the touch.

***

“You seem to have a fever,“ the Duke said, placing a hand on Mel’s forehead. His expression hardened.

“It seems you’ve caught a cold. I’ll call for your physician.“

“I’m fine. Really, I’m not sick,“ Mel protested.

“I’m not fine. For my sake, at least, get checked,“ he said sternly, though there was an odd gentleness in his tone.

His contorted expression was warm, and perhaps because her head felt so foggy, a thought she had never entertained before pushed its way into her mind.

‘If you knew I wasn’t Bleria, would you still say that?’

She smiled faintly, almost tearfully.

“All right, I will,“ she agreed.

Though it was broad daylight, Mel obediently saw the doctor, took her cough syrup, and lay in bed, wrapping herself tightly in the covers.

Though she wasn’t seriously ill, Lucy sat beside her, ready to care for her.

What once felt like stifling surveillance now seemed like an indulgent complaint on her part.

“When you’re feeling better, I’ll bring you melon sorbet. They say it’s very sweet and delicious. The new chef’s skills are amazing…” Lucy’s cheerful chatter pushed away the lingering loneliness.

Though her body felt weak, her heart felt light. The lump in her throat was inexplicable as if her emotions were betraying her physical state. Mel fiddled with the soft, fluffy blanket, realizing how familiar the texture had become.

‘What do you expect me to do…’

Even Damian, who used to threaten her for the slightest mistake, now left her alone. She feared his wrath if her true identity were revealed, but such an event didn’t seem likely anytime soon.

The Duke still believed she was Bleria. Her stomach was warm, and the calluses on her hands were fading.

None of the nobles doubted her. Gopher showed no intention of breaking off the engagement.

She should have been thinking ahead, planning for the end, but the world surrounding her was doing its utmost to soften her resolve.

This extraordinary environment, the people who didn’t dislike her, the things that should have felt foreign—all of it.

And so, a desire she knew she shouldn’t have began to surface.

‘If only I were real. If only I truly were Bleria Heaven…’

Before the thought could fully form, Mel shot upright. Startled, Lucy stood up as well.

“My lady? Are you feeling unwell? Should I call the doctor?“

“I need to see my brother,“ Mel said hurriedly.

“But you’re not well—“

“It’s not that serious. He’s in his study, right?”

Mel rushed out of her room in a flurry as if fleeing from someone.

When she entered the study, Damian was engrossed in his paperwork.

Through the lenses of his glasses, his eyes scanned the text while his pen moved steadily. His detached demeanor, as though he had forgotten anyone else was in the room, oddly reassured her.

Mel spoke.

“I can’t end the engagement.“

“I thought as much,“ Damian replied.

His voice had no anger as if he had never expected otherwise.

“What do I do? It’s one thing to be engaged, but what if I get married?“

“When Father passes, I’ll fake your death and smuggle you out. Start thinking about whether you’d prefer Weiley or Moulton.“

“What if he doesn’t pass? If he lives on, unaware of the truth—“

“So.”

Damian cut her off, lifting his gaze to meet hers.

“What kind of answer are you looking for?”

He didn’t seem angry, but her guilty conscience made it hard to meet his eyes.

She bit down hard as though to suppress the pounding of her heart.

‘Please help me abandon this foolish dream.’

But the words that came out were different from what she intended.

“I just want to know what will happen to me.”

This time, he didn’t just glance at her; he set his pen down entirely. Crossing his arms, he tilted his head slightly.

The ringing in her ears, once oppressive, now felt oddly comforting.

She needed to know her place. She needed fear to erase the delusion that she could keep living this way. Only self-imposed anguish could return her to familiar ground.

But things weren’t going as she planned.