Chapter 23

It’s all just a faded memory now…

Still, I wanted to feel that warmth one more time, so I closed my eyes tightly in front of my mother’s grave.

A breeze brushed against my cheek, as if to tickle me.

I knew it wasn’t real, but for a moment, it felt like my mother had come to see me.

The urge to cry welled up inside me.

“I’ll step away and give you some privacy, my lady.”

“Thank you, Betty.”

Betty quietly moved away, giving me space to speak alone with my mother.

I was grateful for her thoughtfulness—it made it easier to say what was in my heart.

“I really must be my mother’s daughter.”

A sad smile crept onto my lips.

“Father always said that falling in love with someone you marry for political reasons is foolish, but… somehow, I ended up loving my husband.”

I spoke as if my mother was right there in front of me.

All the words I’d buried deep inside, the things I couldn’t tell anyone else, I confessed to her for the first time.

“He makes me so angry, but he’s so wonderful. Sometimes I wonder if things would have been different between us, if we’d met under other circumstances.”

I felt like a child again, whining to my mother the way I used to long ago.

“There’s another woman by his side. But please, don’t be angry. They aren’t the ones at fault—I’m the one who got in the way.”

Even as I spoke about Edward and Sasha, who had caused me so much pain, I couldn’t help but let out a small, helpless laugh.

Maybe because I was talking to my mother, the pain felt a little lighter.

“Oh, and Father and my brothers are doing well. You missed Father so much, even in your last moments… Do you still miss him, even now?”

My mother was a princess of the Empire, a woman who had everything—yet was always desperate for love. Until the very end, she yearned for her husband’s affection.

“I’ve always wondered. You loved Father, and you died with that love in your heart. I wonder if you ever let go of that feeling, even where you are now. Do you still love him?”

I gently brushed the dust and fallen leaves from the gravestone.

I couldn’t say it aloud to my mother, but deep inside, I hoped that her thin thread of love might finally have faded away.

Carrying a feeling like that, even in death, seemed unbearably hard.

“I was able to come today because I had time, but I probably won’t be able to visit again for a while.”

I realized it was time to leave, so I offered my mother a final farewell.

“But we’ll see each other soon. Until then, Mother.”

My footsteps leaving the grave felt lighter.

I’d said everything I wanted to say, and the wounds in my heart seemed a little less deep after confiding in her.

“If the late Duchess could see how beautifully you’ve grown, I’m sure she’d be proud,”

Betty said, approaching from where she’d been waiting in the distance.

“You really think so?”

“Of course!”

I managed a gentle, modest smile as we returned to the Winderton estate.

But as soon as I stepped down from the carriage, I found Lady Eteil waiting for me.

“Where have you been, Lirie?”

She asked with a frown.

“I went to see my mother.”

“…Edward will return in three days.”

Lady Eteil didn’t look pleased with my answer, but she made no further comment.

Instead, she informed me of the day Edward would return.

I didn’t know what had prompted her to be so forthcoming, but I was grateful for it.

‘He’s coming back earlier than I expected.’

But even the news that Edward was coming back no longer made me happy.

I just felt tired.

“Thank you for letting me know, Mother.”

“Make sure you’re prepared. Sasha will probably be with him.”

Even the mention that Sasha would be coming too didn’t change my expression.

If anything, I felt relieved.

“May I go in now?”

“Yes, you may.”

There were things I’d learned and come to accept in the library while I’d been studying business on my own.

First and foremost, I had to admit that Sasha was truly remarkable.

Proving yourself in the Lucenster Empire was no easy feat, but she’d done it.

And no matter how hard I tried, I would never be Edward’s perfect business partner the way Sasha was.

‘To be honest, it’s more like I’ve finally come to terms with it.’

I let out a soft laugh—just as Lady Eteil’s voice called out to me.

“Lirie?”

“Yes, Mother?”

I stopped and turned, halfway inside.

“Has something been going on lately?”

“No, everything’s the same as always,”

I answered casually.

“…If you say so.”

Lady Eteil looked at me with a strange expression, as if trying to gauge what was really happening—whether I might be plotting something after all.

‘That’s hardly the look of a refined noblewoman,’

I thought as I bowed lightly and went upstairs.

The sword Kion had given me was in my bedside drawer.

Alone in my room, I quietly took it out.

Strangely, unlike when I was young, I no longer felt afraid of death.

‘Is it because I’m older now?’

Or maybe it was because everything I’d endured during this brief marriage had worn away even my fear of dying.

There were countless times I’d wanted to die back at the House of Scarlett.

But I could never actually attempt it.

My fear was simply too great.

Every time I try, I gave up.

“This time, I really think I can do it.”

Unlike before, I felt certain I could see it through.

“It won’t be much longer…”

Just a little more, and I would finally be at peace.

***

Three days passed.

Just as Lady Eteil had said, Edward—who’d been away from the estate on business—was returning.

I thought Sasha would be with him, but I heard she would arrive a bit later.

“My lady! His Grace will be arriving at the Winderton estate soon!”

“Really? Thank you for telling me, Betty.”

Before Edward arrived, I hurried to finish getting dressed.

Peeking out the window, I saw the carriage drawing closer.

“My lady, everything is ready. Let’s go down!”

“Let’s take it slow, Betty.”

I stood before the full-length mirror, checking myself one last time for anything out of place.

Taking a deep breath, I finally stepped outside.

The steward and all the servants were waiting at the entrance to greet him.

“You’re here, my lady,”

the steward said, casting a cold glance at me.

I didn’t pay him any mind.

“…Yes.”

I stood before the doors, unflinching and unbothered, waiting for Edward’s arrival.

Today would be the last time I stood here, waiting to greet him at the entrance.

The last time I’d have to endure the servants’ disrespectful stares, the last time I’d hear Edward’s voice heavy with loathing.

‘It’s all over now.’

Faintly, I heard the sound of hooves and carriage wheels.

Edward had arrived.

“…Hoo.”

I took a deep breath, clearing my cluttered mind until only one thought remained.

‘Today, I die.’

***

The wait was short, but it felt as if an eternity had passed.

“His Grace has arrived.”

Soon after, the steward informed me.

Not long after that, the doors of Winderton Hall swung open, and Edward stepped inside, looking utterly exhausted.

His mood seemed foul; he rubbed at the spot above his brow as he entered, then absently adjusted the watch on his wrist.

“You’re out here again today.”

“Yes, Your Grace”

Edward stopped in front of me, clearly annoyed. He was so tall, I had to look up at him.

His cold gaze made me flinch. I thought I’d grown used to that look after all this time, but whenever I faced him like this, it still sent a chill down my spine.

“Do you have something to say to me?”

“No. I was just thinking how you’ve always been the same throughout our marriage.”

Edward stood before me, voice laced with sarcasm, picking at my nerves for reasons I couldn’t guess.

“You haven’t changed either, Your Grace.”

Edward seemed to be in a sour mood, but I tried to let it pass, as if it didn’t bother me.

On any other day, his words might have wounded me.

But today, I was fine.

I wouldn’t let him hurt me anymore.

I just had to get through today.

That was why I could face Edward’s sarcasm and remain unbothered.

‘After today, Edward, you and I both can finally be at peace.’

Everyone knew from the start that happiness was never possible between us—

I was just the last one to realize it.