Am I starting to have feelings too? That was the first thought I had when I opened my eyes this morning. Yesterday I cried. Although I didn’t know it at that time, those tears were definitely caused by emotions.

Perhaps it was the memory of throwing Zetak aside. My rational mind concluded that I didn’t regret it. But was it any different for my emotions?

I looked at Zetak as he rested in my arms. With his head resting on my arm, he wasn’t… breathing softly in his sleep. His red eyes, visible through his dark hair, showed no sign of sleep.

“Are you awake?”

“You truly are not a morning sleeper. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you sleep.”

He got up without a word. As I watched him go into the bathroom, the events of yesterday came back to me. I had told him bluntly that I didn’t regret what I had done to him. But why didn’t he get angry? No, there was no way he could accept it the way it seemed.

He was far too good at hiding his feelings. Even as he brought me a bowl of water to wash my face, even as he stripped me of my nightclothes and changed me into my Academy uniform, I found myself thinking blankly about what had happened yesterday.

“You seem a bit off. Should I take a few more days’ sick leave?”

His voice was calm and I lowered my eyes. Zetak was fastening buttons, his head down so I couldn’t see his face.

“Why aren’t you angry?”

His hands, busy with the buttons, stopped for a moment. But only for a moment – then, as if nothing had happened, he resumed his task.

“You heard what I said yesterday. There’s no need to hide your feelings from me. If you’re angry, get angry. I still have arms and legs to give you.”

He said nothing. He just kept on working in silence. Was he not even going to talk to me? Through his dark hair I caught a glimpse of his ear. There were patches of faint blue scales. Instinctively, I reached out, but before my hand could touch his ear, he grabbed my wrist.

“Please don’t.”

“Is it just touching your ears that you don’t like?”

“I don’t like it.”

“It doesn’t seem fair. Does it? You can touch me as much as you like, but I can’t do the same.”

Come to think of it, it was true. That day I was too weak from the medicine to touch anything. In fact, Zetak even covered my eyes to prevent me from seeing his tentacles. Meanwhile, he had his way, touching me as much as he liked. How could there be such unfairness?

“When I was unconscious, you tied me up with your tentacles and played with me, didn’t you? You drained every last bit of my energy. That’s why I’m so weak now. So I have the right to touch you.”

Zetak’s expression twisted strangely at my words.

“Honestly… Your Highness is just…”

For some reason, he wiped his face with dry hands. Though he looked like a young boy, his actions were like those of an old man who had transcended everything. He muttered what seemed like a curse under his breath, but in the end, the strength left the hand that had been holding mine. If only he had done this sooner. I gently rubbed the cool, snake-like scales on the rim of his ear with my thumb and index finger.

“There are so many ways to seduce.”

I grabbed his ear and lifted it as he muttered a curse. Zetak’s gaze naturally moved up to meet mine.

“You often say that I’m trying to seduce you. So, if I really tried, would you fall for it?”

I relaxed again, lightly touching his ear as I asked. Zetak looked up at me with a serious expression.

“You say things like that so casually. It seems like you’ve done it many times before.”

“Well… I’ve never actually done it, but it seems easy enough. Just holding your hand is seduction, touching your ear is seduction. Can’t I do anything with someone like that?”

Zetak closed his mouth at my words. I kept touching his once cold ear until it warmed up, and for some reason I started to feel sleepy.

“I’m thinking of taking another sick leave today and just sleep.”

“You only took the medicine once. You’ll have to take it once a week from now on – what are you going to do?”

“No. I won’t take it anymore. I’ll throw it away.”

“You will be summoned by the Emperor.”

“Let them summon me. What will they do if I refuse? To hell with an imperial order.

Then why did you force me to take it?

It almost seemed as if I had heard those words, but when I looked down at Zetak, his expression remained unchanged. Though his face was expressionless, his red eyes seemed to burn with intensity. I suppose it made sense. Aside from the effects of the medicine, the smell alone was horrible…

“Don’t feel so bad. You drank it when you were young, didn’t you?”

“And what does that matter?”

“I’m already an adult, so I can’t expect any additional effects. But you drank it when you were growing up, so you can expect secondary effects. Perhaps your cocoon …… could grow considerably, so don’t feel so wronged.”

There’s no creature that would object to such growth. To be honest, I don’t really know if it will have that effect. But since it’s an elixir from the Imperial Palace, it should have at least that much effect. Probably. Still, Zetak’s expression didn’t lighten. In fact, it seemed to have become more rigid, even uncomfortable.

“It seems you were about to say the word ‘cocoon’. Am I mistaken?”

“You must be mistaken. You are a snake and a spider. You’re not fused with a cocoon, so why would I say such a thing to you?”

There’s likely no creature that wouldn’t get angry after being humiliated about their cocoon. After all, monsters take immense pride in that part of themselves. The comment I had been thinking of accidentally slipped out, but there was still a way to recover. Considering that I was once a monster in my past life, I understood their way of thinking well.

“You have consumed that elixir during your growth period. As a result, yours will probably grow to the size of a large sweet potato or radish.”

If I mention growth, he should be pleased, right? However, Zetak’s expression didn’t just remain stiff—it turned completely stone-like. It seemed my words didn’t sit well with him.

“I must have miscalculated.”

I should have used a larger example. Come to think of it, he’s no longer human. Even if I used what humans consider a large example, it would likely feel insignificant from a monster’s perspective. I tried to recall the largest monster I had seen in my past life. It was about the size of an imperial palace. I hadn’t seen the size of that part, but surely it would have been proportional to its massive build.

“Yours will probably reach the length of a bamboo—”

“Shut up.”

“…”

“People might think it’s fused to a p*nis. Is it a human or a monster?”

You are a monster. I wanted to say that, but I chose to stay silent instead. His expression didn’t look good, after all. With a sigh, he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“This is unbearable… It seems staying by Your Highness’s side was a mistake.”

For a moment, it felt as though my heart stopped. Was he planning to leave the imperial palace? Because of what I said yesterday? Has staying by my side become so unbearable for him? Before I even realized it, I had already grabbed his wrist.

Without realising it, I had gripped him tightly, but Zetak just looked down at his hand, showing no particular reaction. I didn’t understand why I had grabbed his wrist either and just stood there, frozen.

“What’s this all about?”

“I don’t know either. Just…”

I was afraid you were going somewhere. As I mumbled these words, Zetak’s expression changed strangely. He looked at me for a long time, then let go of my hand.

“I really made a mistake. At this rate…”

It feels like it’s going to break. He murmured something unintelligible and let out a sigh. Somehow his expression was one of fear. What does he mean by breaking? Why is he behaving like this? Could he really be thinking of leaving the Imperial Palace? No, he couldn’t.

With a body like that, he wouldn’t dare think of going far away from me. The chances of being hunted down and killed by the priests are far too high. He doesn’t know that he’s fused with an almost immortal monster. That alone would prevent him from acting rashly.

But that wasn’t enough. There had to be some way to keep him on my side. Something more.

I knelt on one knee and met his gaze. Noticing that his gaze had strangely risen above mine, I brushed his hair back. The scars from the burns and the snake scales that covered his face were revealed to me.

“What must I do?”

“…”

“What must I do for you to stay by my side? Just tell me. I’ll do anything.”

He remained silent, just looking at me with an even more twisted expression. A weight settled in my chest. Frustration? Disappointment? Or maybe it was just indigestion. But I hadn’t had breakfast yet.

“Even if I made my body like yours, you’d still refuse. Even if I offered you my left arm, you’d still refuse. So what will it take to appease you? Shall I carry you and give you a piggyback ride?”

“A piggyback ride… Please, don’t say such things with such a blank expression on your face…”

“Then do you have your own way of getting the revenge you want?”

In the future, Zetak had killed all the nobles and destroyed the empire just because it was under my rule as emperor. Was that what he wanted now? But I’m no longer the Crown Prince, and I’m certainly not going to be Emperor, so it shouldn’t be like that.

“Why are you so desperate to ease my anger?”

“That’s because…”

So I don’t die. Surely that was the reason. But strangely it felt like there was something else, something different. Something deep inside me screamed that there was another reason. Zetak stopped smiling at me. The bright, cheerful smile of five years ago was gone. Even if it had been flattery, it still mattered. Zetak’s cool fingers brushed slowly over my cheek.

“With a face that looks like you’re about to cry…”

“What…?”