Chapter 15.1: Falling (Part 2)

Kiern looked steadily at Elizabeth, who had come at his summons. She stood with her back against the wall, maintaining a certain distance. Though she would come if he called and go if he sent her, she no longer approached first. The stark difference made Kiern feel increasingly twisted.

Elizabeth no longer smiled brightly in front of him, nor did she cry and reveal her emotions. Standing silently, she seemed eager to finish quickly, knowing he would send her away afterward.

‘It feels worse than I thought.’

Since Elizabeth’s poisoning incident, Kiern found it increasingly difficult to deal with her. He had known she was broken long ago, but he hadn’t expected her to make such an extreme choice given her nature.

She probably longed for freedom, choosing death to escape this hellish life. However, if he let her go, he would have nothing left. He would be left alone in a world of gray forever.

It was hard enough to endure now, but without her, it seemed he wouldn’t be able to endure at all. Knowing she was withering away, he couldn’t let her go, making him feel somewhat pathetic. Kiern impulsively spoke.

“Ellie, do you know why I keep you by my side?”

At that question, Elizabeth finally met his gaze. Her golden eyes still harbored fear. She spoke with a trembling voice.

“Why do you keep me by your side?”

Though she pretended to be okay, she was so overwhelmed that she couldn’t control even her voice. Knowing this, Kiern couldn’t stop. He raised his hand, signaling her to come closer. The movement of his slender fingers was graceful, but the intention was far from elegant.

Smoke rose from the cigar in his hand. In the past, she would have nagged him to quit because it was bad for his health, but not anymore.

Elizabeth’s gaze briefly shifted to his fingertips, but that was all. She turned her gaze as if she no longer cared whether he smoked or not.

Then, without being told, she approached on her knees. It was an act as if asking to be treated like a hunted animal or a street slave.

Kiern felt a surge of emotion at her act of lowering herself. And if that’s what she wanted, he was the type to oblige.

He impulsively grabbed her chin and exhaled smoke. Despite the heavy smoke of the cigar, she didn’t close her eyes. She merely looked at Kiern with an expression he couldn’t decipher, as if blaming him.

You’re the one who ruined me like this.

So don’t expect to take even a sliver of my heart anymore.

Kiern knew this, but he pretended not to. As he stroked her cheek, he spoke.

“To think you still don’t know. Ellie, you’re more naive than I thought.”

At his deliberately provocative words, Elizabeth bit her lower lip. The woman who once suited the word “naive” best was now far from it. And it was Kiern himself who had made her that way.

He felt both love and hatred for her innocence. He missed the bright eyes that looked at him but also resented her for knowing nothing. And he hated her for siding with Stella despite knowing everything. He had wanted to destroy her.

The feelings he tried so hard to ignore, insisting he wasn’t drawn to her, only grew stronger, leaving him engulfed in guilt. 

He avoided her, believing he was committing an unforgivable sin as a son. Yet, the more he evaded her, the closer Elizabeth came, until he finally broke her down.

Unfortunately, her light could not overcome his darkness. Instead, it was devoured. Kiern growled as he stared into Elizabeth’s eyes, now completely devoid of light.

“No, it can’t be. There’s no way you could be naive with that woman’s blood in you. Are you doing it on purpose? Coveting the position of Duchess like your mother?”

Feeling simultaneous disgust at himself for trying to extract even a shred of emotion from her this way.

And as he expected, emotion began to appear in Elizabeth’s eyes.

“Kiern.”

Hearing his name from Elizabeth’s lips, Kiern couldn’t control himself. Did she know? How complicated his feelings were every time those lips called his name.

Kiern was shaken whenever Elizabeth called his name. So shaken that he even wanted to give up revenge.

The first time he held her. When he falsely said he loved her, it wasn’t really a lie. Though he didn’t need to say those words, seeing Elizabeth whispering lovingly, calling his name, he spoke impulsively.

Yet, inwardly, he kept insisting it wasn’t love. How could he dare to love the daughter of his enemy? How could he love the daughter of the woman his dying mother had warned him never to trust?

Kiern couldn’t admit it. Even now, he rationalized that he was merely desiring her body.

She was beautiful and lovely, after all. He kept telling himself it was just that, yet the word “love” was what undid him. Just hearing her call his name made his nerves sharpen.

“Who said you could call my name so freely?”

At his reproachful question, Elizabeth’s lips quivered. Her eyes, filled with emotion, had a different shade than before. Her once sparkling eyes grew duller and duller. It was far better than when she acted like an emotionless doll for the past few days.

Feeling a burning thirst, he leaned forward. As the distance closed, she trembled. Annoyed by that reaction, Kiern unwittingly tightened his grip. At the pressure, she let out a faint voice.

“It hurts.”

Feeling pathetic for immediately loosening his grip, Kiern spoke as if making a resolution. As if this was his true intention. Even knowing it would hurt her, he didn’t hesitate to wound her. To him, it seemed the only answer was to drive a dagger into Elizabeth’s heart.

“Don’t pretend to be naive. It’s only creepy when you do.”

“…….”

“Don’t delude yourself either. I didn’t take in someone even that woman abandoned because I pitied you or loved you.”

When he finally mentioned Stella, Elizabeth began to crumble. Kiern brushed his fingers over her quivering lips.

“It’s just simple revenge. Just as your mother ruined my mother’s life, I intend to tear your life to pieces.”

Thinking this was the reason and everything for keeping her by his side. For this one reason, Kiern hadn’t hesitated to confine her.

Walking this path, he now found it chilling. A relationship like a monster and its unfortunate prey, sacrificed to that monster. Even if he let go of the already shattered prey, it wouldn’t come back to life.

Kiern lacked the courage to stop the revenge now, nor the tenacity to continue it. Like floating dust, he chose to wither alongside her, watching her dry up. He couldn’t abandon or forgive himself, and he felt pathetic.

As he pressed his fingers, a hot, soft tongue touched his parted lips. The tender sensation was enough to cloud Kiern’s mind.

The more Elizabeth tried to close her mouth, the more intense the stimulation became.

As Kiern’s touch grew persistent, Elizabeth’s face began to flush. Simultaneously, her golden eyes started to sparkle like water-soaked stars.

Seeing her trying not to shed the tears that filled her eyes, refusing to close them, made him feel both pitiful and inexplicably displeased. He murmured lowly.

“Don’t cry. You don’t even have the right to cry.”

“…….”

“Just stay prostrated at my feet for the rest of your life, paying for your mother’s sins. That’s the only path to forgiveness you spoke of.”

This was the only answer he could find. To keep her by his side and live together in hell. The sweet ticket to paradise would never be granted to either of them. Kiern decided to fall into the abyss with her.

Kiern adjusted his posture and captured Elizabeth’s lips. Then, with damp hands, he began to explore her body. His touch, trailing down her delicate neckline, was hot, but Elizabeth felt only chills. When she shrank back and resisted, Kiern’s eyes gleamed with a strange light.

He held her nape firmly and began tangling his tongue deeply with hers. Their lips were not just captured but crushed, teeth clashing together. Heat lingered wherever his tongue traced along her teeth.

When Elizabeth instinctively tried to pull away, it only made Kiern more desperate. He sucked on her fleeing tongue and tangled his fingers in her disheveled red hair. His hands roamed over her rounded shoulders, seeking out sensitive spots to stimulate.

Before long, her clothes were halfway undone. He left marks on her pale skin as if staking his claim. Twisting her *rect n*pples, Elizabeth couldn’t hold back her moans.

“Ahh…”

Her body, already accustomed to him, began to respond to his touch. This was deeply humiliating, but Kiern didn’t stop. Finally, as his hand delved into the wet bush and rubbed her cl*toris, Elizabeth collapsed against him.

“Aah…!”

It felt as though a storm of emotions was raging within her. She hated him for treating her so cruelly, but she hated herself even more for responding so easily to his touch. She despised the man who destroyed her life and consumed her soul, but her body still reacted to him, and that disgusted her.

“Ahh, hnng!”

Elizabeth buried her face in his shoulder, pleading with him. She just wanted him to finish. She also wanted this nightmare to end quickly so she could finally be free.